While coming to grips with, and yes, mourning, the loss of a recent sub, I've been considering the loss of other subs over the past couple of years, and the reasons for those endings. Some partings have been my responsibility (okay, 'fault'), and some have been from other causes.
Each has brought to mind that online D/s relationships might perhaps be more fragile, more prone to misunderstanding, than those in person. At lest in person, misunderstandings might be more easily seen and addressed face to face. Online is often missing all the visual, body language and eye contact clues which might otherwise help keep a relationship healthy. It might take greater care from both Dom/Domme and sub.
Looking back, perhaps the most frequent, and distressing, reason for my losing a sub was the accidental disclosure of our relationship to a sub's in person significant other. Carelessness in electronic communications, in other words. Maybe we Cagers don't think often enough about this real danger area. A mutually satisfying relationship can, and has more than once for me, ended in a POOF! when messages have been left where an SO could read them.
Saying or doing something which is misunderstood, or taken in a way not intended, has also tripped up a relationship for me, probably my bad, through careless communicating. Life changes also have led to loss of connection, too --moving, divorces, family medical changes, etc. These often can't be helped, and also affect in person relationships.
So, what is my point? Only to remind that impermanence--fragility--is an ever-lurking possibility in our online activities. Seeking out the giving and receiving of whatever sort of satisfactions we need is something I'm learning actively savor on a daily basis.
Things can change in a heartbeat.
