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Longer-Term D/s Considerations

Things unseen often affect relationships. This is a (perhaps infrequent) chance to look at some of them through the lens of a decade or more of online experiences with a variety of submissive partners.
5 years ago. May 28, 2019 at 2:42 PM

Recently I have had to grapple with something new in my Dominant life.... subs with major medical issues.

I'm not sure I handled them as well as I might have.  I tended to be slow in realizing how much such events instantly can shut down any submissive feelings.  I compounded that by  trying to keep some whiffs of 'Domlyness'  in the dialogue, when in retrospect that was unthinking.

I realize now that just dropping  any thoughts of kink,  instead going full-bore with vanilla human sympathy and support is clearly the best path for me when confronted with events of medical necessity..They are, can be, all consuming.

We're  moving on from those brinks.  I haven't been criticized, but probably I should have been.  Still, grappling with medical issues with in a D/s relationship made me realize that medical issues need to be squarely faced with a caring heart  while everything else goes on a back burner.  Should there be a next time  (here's hoping not!)  I hope I remember sooner what I've realized,  and send the flowers and supporting  thoughts right away, and keep them coming without thought of the  D/s relationship....

I wouldn't wish medical issues on anyone...They are out there, though.

TakenLower - It’s only a mistake if you didn’t learn from it, and it looks like you’ve learned from the experience. It’s hard to know when to drop the D/s and just be a friend because you don’t want your sub to feel like the Dominant has abandoned them. I think just letting them know that it’s their call is helpful in that.
5 years ago
HGB​(sub female){Scottish M} - So happy to hear you stuck around and didn't bail. Many do. Being involved with someone with illness can be a challenge. You learned that is a big deal. Hope it doesn't happen any time soon.
5 years ago
CapnRick​(dom male) - Appreciate your comments, all. You've each given me more thoughts of value....
5 years ago
Satindragon{Not Lookin} - Let's not forget that Dom's are human too. They also get sick or have medical issues. Part of that package is taking care of each other.
5 years ago
lstcntrygrll - Juggling kink, health issues of a D/s (either your own or a family member) is challenging, specially when it's a family member that needs your complete focus. Sadly, it does affect the D/s relationship.
5 years ago

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