My Castle Vault

Memories. 

That's what it gives me.

Snapshots of times I have broken.

Still-frames of who gave me the hand-ups.

Music.

Oh, the music.

My life in stereo.

Every one I have ever loved has a melody.

Some of those have changed key and time signature over the years.

Sometimes it's lyrics.

Sometimes it is when I first heard the song.

The Sound Track to my life.

My life is the people I have loved.

It always has been.

{found in drafts, i feel like this is the right time to publish it}

Preface:  I tried my best to filter out my emotions while I was crafting this, and I did not polish it quite as well as I would have liked.  I ran out of the appropriate size and shape of spoons for the task.  This is crafted as a reaction to a Forum thread gone rogue.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I have never in my life genuinely *needed* a man.

I love my children, but I did not need to have them in order to feel fulfilled.  In fact, given my lack of maturity at age 18, I would say that I would have been more fulfilled the whole way around if I had waited until I was actually stable in my life before I had them.  
 

A man’s choice for me ruined that.  

So, setting the reproduction issue aside, as I don’t think that we have gotten to the part of science and ethics where creating a human life is viable without bits and parts from both sexes; I will continue. 

When I am in need of someone to comfort me, help me, guide me... I never needed a man specifically for that.    I needed someone I could trust, and respect and allow myself to be vulnerable with.  Cock and ego not required. (in fact, those usually made things worse) 

If I had the choice, I would live in the middle of nowhere, far from the current politics of men, and the infrastructure they’ve corrupted. 

Women are conditioned to depend on men.  We are *taught* that stuff for the basis of survival.  It is not the be all end all bottom line. 

It’s conditioning and delusion of lesser men, and the women they have damaged for generations.

 
Are women these glorious creatures that can do no wrong?  No.  But to say that women need men, because they cannot do the things men do is, and ever will be insulting and disrespectful. 

Do I think that men can live without women?  Yeah.  Same reasons.   It would be just as insulting and disrespectful to men to claim otherwise. 

Asking to be shown the same respect as a woman, that we would be shown as a man; is not us oppressing and disrespecting men. 

1: When did you lose your virginity?

Age 17, with someone i worked with.  (terribly boring sex, as most penetrative sex has been for 25 ish years)

2: Rough sex or soft sex?

Depends on the person i am having sex with.

3: Do you have any unusual kinks/fetishes?

It's really hard to say what is unusual these days, but i would say yeah.. i think i might have one that qualifies lol.

4: Weirdest place you’ve had sex?

Woods doesn't seem weird to me, neither does in a van/car.  Swimming pool?  Oh wait, roof of the house?

5: Favorite sex position?

i haven't tried them all, so how can i choose a favourite?

"Fuck me like a bitch in heat."  << my younger self's opinion

6: Do you like to be dominant or submissive?

A significant chunk of the time i am subby, but i have my Dommy moments.

7: Have you ever had any one night stands?

No, i have had "sex-ish" but not a one night stand.

8: Sex on the bed, couch or the floor?

Prefer the sofa or sex furniture, but beds work too.  i have a strong preference for not having sex where i sleep though.

9: Have you ever had sex in a public place?

Yes.

10: Have you ever been caught masturbating?

Yup.

11: What does your favourite underwear look like?

On me, or on someone else?

12: How often do you have sex?

That depends on your definition of sex.

13: Is there anybody right now you’d like to have sex with?

Yup.

14: Do you prefer giving or receiving oral sex?

Giving

15: Most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to you during sex?

Well, yeah, i am sure there are at least a dozen stories that could go here, but i can't really remember them since they are mortifying lol.

16: A song you’d listen to during hard/rough/kinky sex?

Head like a Hole by NIN, Pretty When You Cry by Vast, Coming Up For Air Leather Strip

(These are remnants of when i was in my late 20s)

17: A song you’d listen to during soft/slow sex?

i don't think i have an answer for this

18: Are you into dressing up for sex?

Costuming and lingerie is very fun, i like being dressed up

19: Would you prefer sex in the bath or sex in the shower?

Yes.  A fan of both.

20: If you could have sex with any celebrity right now, who would it be?

Hmn.  i don't actually have an answer here.

21: Have you ever had a threesome?

Yes.

22: Do you/would you use sex toys?

Yes, much lots.  Lovense are fun.  Magic Wands are too.

23: Have you ever sent someone a dirty text/picture?

Lol... often.

24: Would you have sex with your best friend?

Lol.

25: Is there anything you do after sex?

Help clean up the mess if i am able to think/move/process reality.

26: Something that will never fail to get you horny?

Submitting

27: Early morning sex or late night sex?

Yes.

28: Favorite body part on the opposite sex?

Okay, i am a sucker for pretty eyes across the board.  But favourite on a man.... hmn.  Nah, that is too personal to the man i am with lol.  Not something across the board.

29: Favorite body part on the same sex?

Okay, i am a sucker for pretty eyes across the board.  Chest and ass, with chest winning out just by a smidge.

30: Do you watch porn?

Yes, technically.  i watch spanking videos, as soon as any actual sexual acts start i shut it off/skip to the next spanking scene or next video.