One week down....
Too many more to go.
One day feels like a week.
This past week felt like a month.
How am I to survive the next couple of (actual) months?? How am I to keep my anxiety from surfacing?? How do I keep my need to see Him under control?? How do I keep my mind from going crazy until I can finally feel His touch??
I wish I could close my eyes, open them, and see that our weekend is finally here. But that's not possible. I must find a way to distract my mind from being so impatient. The problem with that is...well...no matter what I do, He is always in my thoughts. I thought this past weekend would be a bit distracting for me (as I went out of town to see family). I was wrong.
The entire time I kept wishing He was there with me. I imagined Him looking for my hand whenever we went out somewhere. I pictured Him laughing and talking and joking and just having a great time with my family. Those are just SOME of the thoughts I had all weekend long.
I was so desperate to at least hear His voice but He was also with family. I did try my hardest to enjoy myself but I failed time after time. The more everyone seemed to have fun…the less I enjoyed myself…and the more my anxiety got agitated. Though I do have to admit that my nerves calmed down a bit when He sent me two beautiful pictures. I did use them to help me when I’d feel a panic attack trying to surface. Master managed to calm me down yet again.
How does He always manage to calm me down? How does He always know what to say and what to do? How can He be so strong to ease all my pains? He is the most wonderful Master any girl could ever dream of. I am the luckiest slave!
I love you more and more with each passing day, Master!! ?❤️