Hello Friends,
Songs speak for me but I can not promote my originals as it is a commercial activity. What I can do is share songs that mean a great deal to me and thus offer a peek inside my heart, soul, and mind. The first song is "Bonnie Raitt - I Can't Make You Love Me".
Hello Friends,
Yes, I chose to write a blog entry today. Lately, I have been feeling that at my age, I should not have a future outlook. Many well-known people and some not-so-well-known people have passed away at 76, my age: Jimmie Buffet, Melonie, Richard Tandy, Richard Lewis, OJ Simpson, et al. On the other hand, many of my family members lived into their 90's. So. If I want to adopt a positive attitude as a close friend encourages me to and admonishes me for negative vibes, this is a start:
"Yes, I am an older guy, and I have had an uncountable number of sexual encounters of many variations. I am settling into a pattern despite age related challenges: I desire a soft-spoken, affectionate woman who grows into a friendship, and once we know and trust each other, have sex from easygoing to whipped-up extremely passionate lovemaking as we learn to be lovers for each other. This takes time. Should I be in a hurry? No, I must not because the quality of both the friendship and the sex depend upon taking time to develop a relationship that can meet this goal."
My wife has a terminal disease, and its progression can not enable an accurate prognosis. What shall I do? I need to find the most profound amount of wisdom that I can summon to help guide me into such an ambiguous future.
The opinions are abundant, but the wisdom has yet to emerge.
I wish all those who have followed my blog good luck and farewell. JH
Hello Friends,
A king may abdicate, and a boss may resign or retire. How does a domant end his or her dominance?
A dominant must be in charge at all times (unless he or she is a switch) of submissives. Letting a submissive get away without consequences when not acting as a submissive, allowing the submissive to become in charge of a situation, and when a submissive punishes the dom for something the sub dislikes, this is the beginning of the end.
Sure, the dominant may drop the guise and become nothing or even submissive themself. This is a world of many possibilities.
When a dominant feels like they are falling short and abandoning the drive to act as a dominant, this can lead to being neither and then depressed and frustrated. There is no future to look forward to, and losing trust and hope is all part of this shift into nothingness.
The whirlpool of negativity swallows some people up. One negative experience or thought leads to another, and then, like falling into a black hole, there is darkness and nothingness. It can swallow you whole, and as the cosmological theory of black holes goes, there is a point of no escape when one passes the event horizon (the new now).
There is no need to say goodbye or offer parting words; simply fade away. "Old soldiers never die; they just fade away."
Gen. Douglas MacArthur, April 19, 1951
Hello Friends,
My life has been far from carefree, and now I see I have also been careless. Recent thoughts about myself center on the negatives—negatives that are not life-threatening but nevertheless negative. I am not good company, and I can only claim to be a marginal friend to anyone who gets close enough to notice. I will be 77 in July, which isn't very far from 80 years old. My family reaching the 90s has been the norm, but if there isn't a reason to live that long, why bother is my thought. Once, I had so much enthusiasm to do, see, and learn so many things, but now I don't care much about that or those things. As a scientist, technocrat, artist, writer, and independent recording artist, I seem fruitless and shallow to me now. Estranged from my children and isolated from people with few exceptions indicates I have a terrible character, and others see it. What is worse? I don't care enough to desire change.
Yes, I have a negative taste in my mouth, and I expect it will grow until it overwhelms me, and I will choose to fade from all social interaction very, very soon. All together.
Hello Friends,
Although cognitively impaired, my wife has a habit of surprising me. One recent evening, we were sitting on the couch, and I was getting her to laugh with small talk. In the middle of the time, I jokingly told her, "If you are good today, I will tie you up with ropes for a while this evening." She laughed and grinned, and in the aphasia language, she seemed to tell me she would like that. Now I am considering taking a course in Japanese rope tieing art.
Hello Friends,
I dreamed that I was treating my leather baseball glove, cowboy boots, and military spit-shined boots, and a notion crept over me concerning all things leather. I was inspired to look through a leather kink catalog, and when I tallied up what I ordered, it came to $869.69. I hope I ordered the right leather outfit and accessories. I remember ordering English leather (TM) cologne.
Hello Friends,
I just learned about cock pumps and cock rings. I am curious and wonder if they work as well as advertised.
Hello friends,
I have a new fantasy: I want to loose my cock inside a big loose, very wet pussy. Yes, juicy lips and folds, big clit to suck on, and so slippery I almost fall inside her. Wow, that would be so enjoyable. I hope I will get a chance to have that experience.
Hello Friends,
The first moment of connecting with someone interested in you as much as you are interested in them is like an electric shock that feels welcome. How often does this happen? It happens more than I thought. The thrill is addicting, and it is like falling in love for the first time, even if it is limited to a brief conversation. This is a positive moment so I hope to have such events in the future.