Hey all,
Another personal shared topic: is loneliness. You who follow me know I have been a caregiver for my wife of 39 years starting with her early onset diagnosis of dementia in 2017. The caregiving intensified over the last three years and so did my being isolated in a strange town, not my native State. We moved here because our family promised to help us but they have not A large part of the day I am busy but once I get my wife asleep in bed the loneliness swallows me up alive. I made many errors looking for a companion and have been significantly scammed. And although I have a woman who is a cyber love, she never came to me or visited me. My wife is but a fraction of what she once was slipping away from me slowly but steadily and the song by Brooks & Dunn - Neon Moon Neon Rainbow lyric says it most excellently "When the sun goes down on my side of town That lonesome feeling comes to my door And the whole world turns blue . . ."
The doctors and shared group counselors tell me unless I get some respite and help soon I may pass away before my wife or many caregivers in my position do. I keep trying but either red tape shortage of funds or lack of family help. I abandoned looking for a companion online. The latest search seeking a sub to be my companion clashed with my Cyber Girlfriend's insistence that will be her job (whenever she gets here). so I ended my interviews for her sake. I know despite support groups' counselors and meds I am in some way damaged goods emotionally. I have a survivor instinct and that keeps me going.
In the meantime, I have my job as a caregiver and I have gone back to my songwriting and established a mini digital recording studio.
"When the sun goes down on my side of town That lonesome feeling comes to my door And the whole world turns blue . . ."