When can I start a new life? The caregiving for my wife that began in 2017 has weighed me down more day by day. No, I can neither give up on her nor have someone give me a vacation from my caregiving. Without discussing current events in detail, I will only say they have deepened my depression. Nowhere to go. Nothing interested me anymore, so I just had to wait for the inevitable end we all must face one day.
The irony? I loved living and seeing nature and watching the advances in science, especially space exploration. Now? I don't care at all.
Negative news sells, and I no longer read newspapers or watch TV, but seeing updates on the internet is difficult to ignore. That is because the Internet is my last connection with the outside world beyond my home, where I care for my ill wife.
I apologize for being so negative; however, in my 77 years and a half, I have never felt this isolated and alone. I always found a shred of hope on the darkest night.
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