I do not have any idea where this post will lead, I have not thought it out completely, as of yet, I only know what has been laid on My heart to say here.. W/we (Me, Flitter, and My wife, Natalie) have 3 cats.. TWO, Furrocious (EMPHASIS on the FURR) and Fable are both ferals that were caught and tamed by U/us (Me and Natalie) the third (Star) was a foster that needed taken care of for a couple months.. That was WAY over a year ago..
Star prefers to be an only cat, and does not take kindly to other cats.. They're always fighting, and raising Cain when the 'Hoomans' are trying to relax, or worse yet, trying to sleep.. Star has a tendency to sit in the bathroom, OR at the top of the closet to get her space from the others.. When she sits in the bathroom, anyone that comes in is accosted by her.. Sitting on the counter, swiping at them with her paw wanting loving and/or attention..
That all being said, Natalie and I have been together for well over 6 years now, despite the fact that she is only 27.. Flitter is a new member to O/our poly dynamic and still finding new things that Nat and I B/both take for granted as being understood.. *I* am 'old school' as many here have pointed out, more than a few times, I accept that, but also know that MY views HAVE to evolve to make this relationship work.. I feel that I AM trying to evolve My views on what is acceptable and what is NOT, as well as internalizing things I would not have accepted even 10 years ago.. NOT just from flitter, but from My 'little' Natalie as well.. I am seeing the similarities between Star, and My Flitter, reaching out for a lifeline from Daddy, wanting the comfort and the validation that their needs are important, to ME, their Daddy.. I have failed in the communication parts so far, more often than not, but I AM, like all 'Hoomans', a 'work in progress'.. I may not see the claw swipe for the attempt to get My attention that it is, and might see it as an attack on Who or WHAT I am.. But I am Man and Warrior enough to admit when I take those swipes wrong, and I do My best every single day to NOT lash out in defense of said issues.. I internalize, consider all the possibilities and return with a course of action that *I* feel will benefit E/everyone..
This will be an ongoing issue, I'm sure, but one that *I* feel Love and purpose will iron the kinks out of as time goes by.. NOBODY is perfect, LEAST of all, ME.. *I* am no less 'Hooman' than anyone else reading these words. I freely admit this, and apologize all the time on those occasions (which are far more frequent than I like to admit) that I am wrong..
I just want My Flitter to KNOW, she is here for a reason, and NOTHING she does is rejected out of hand, or at ALL for no reason.. She IS a member of My Family, and I hope, when that day comes, and the Lord calls Me Home, SHE is holding My hand, along with Natalie, to help ease My passing..
My apologies for the book I've written here, I did not mean for it to meander as much as it did.. But these words and the jumbled emotions NEEDED to be expressed..
I have been gone from My account for a bit, but MOSTLY because I felt I had found what I sought, so felt no further need to be here.. Flitter has opened My eyes to see that even though she is HOME, finally, I DO have so much more to offer and express with the experience at My disposal, and I want to help make the Community here the best it CAN be, if I am able to do so..
Thank you, My Flitter, for helping to open My eyes.. I love You, My Princess..
Daddy.
Edited for My Dyslexic and fat fingers, because I always get on Flitter for her grammar, and MINE was absolutely HORRIBLE here..
