Lately, I have been seeing a lot of folks talking about others betraying their trust, lying, or straight up ignoring the rules of consent (and I am not talking in a CNC way... this may not be my jam, but Consent is STILL essential here). Anyone, Dom or sub, Predator or prey, Big or little, should have their rights and consent honoured, and Consent can only be given if there is Trust and Honesty.
For Example (this popped up in a recent post):
If you have a transmittable disease (sexually or not), you should be up front and honest about it. Someone cannot give full consent without true honesty. If someone tells you that they are clean of all transmittable diseases, and then knowingly infects you, that is a Crime in the UK, no matter the circumstances of that transmission. I don't know the law in other regions of the world, but I assume that in most this is also the case. If you go into a relationship or dynamic and knowingly lie about something that serious, that is a massive breach of trust and negates ANY given Consent, also it makes you a MASSIVE DOUCHE CANOE who is only fit for fertilizer.
In all relationships, no matter how fleeting, they should always be built on Trust, Honesty, and Consent. If you are friends with someone, it should be built on Trust, Honesty and Consent (especially if there is Benefits to that friendship). If you are in a non-relationship BDSM dynamic with someone, it should be built on Trust, Honesty, and Consent. Consent cannot be given if someone is being dishonest.
Being HONEST with each other (groups included), giving and receiving TRUST, and getting and giving CONSENT is SEXY to me.
If someone lies, if someone is distrustful, or someone ignores consent, they could be the sexiest looking person on the planet, and I would walk the other way if I saw them coming.
It is shocking to me that people in a Vanilla setting still do not get this, let alone within the BDSM community.
If you come across someone who betrays trust, lies, or oversteps the rules of consent, do not go quietly into that fair night. Shout it out loud! Burn that Bridge! Shit, light the fires of Gondor if you have to - We have a duty to those around us to call out injustice, malice, bigotry and hatred in all its forms, and the best way of doing that is to stand by Honesty, Trust, and Consent. And if you do, you are FAR sexier for it.
I never judge someone based on what kinks or fetishes gets someone off, but I do judge people based on their actions, how they treat others, and whether they have Honesty, are Trustful, or value Consent.
Now go out there and be the Sexy Bastards and Bitches, Littles and Bigs, Fuzzies and Scalies, Doms and Subs that you know you are!