stress, tension, frustration, grief have all taken a grave toll on me. i am not sweet or succulent or anything in between.
instead, maybe i am a giant tumbleweed on fire? potentially an accurate description.
everything is so built up my sleep is a disaster, i'm running from one thing to the next, i've had a headache for three days and two nights.
tonight my head is pounding, my heart is racing but slow and sinking.
small bouts of a rubber crop on my thigh as hard as i can swing, i can feel the small bursts of beauty in the dark. it stings and it tingles and i can feel everything relax and then goosebumps.
my headache is easing up, my shoulders are almost loose. i can feel the release in some parts of my body but never as many as when you are holding the handle. being shamed for self-harm, i carry so much guilt and embarrassment when i am the one who has done the deed.
thank you, from the bottom of my heart