Monsters, I have a monster deep inside of me. I think that we all do. My monster was pushing its way out to run rampant. I tried to stuff him down because monsters are bad and should never be out. But when you shove them back into their dark cages they feed on the darkness and grow into a frenzy becoming stronger each time you try to shove them back “into their place”. They don’t like that.
the only way is to open that cage and let them bust out and run. Monsters I believe are not very good at distance running. You ask why in the hell would you let a monster out, monsters are bad and must be contained? No no matter how scary you think your monster is by freeing and think of what the destruction It would do. It’s much more scary keeping it locked up filling it’s cage day by day, not acknowledging it and when not if it breaks out all hope is gone.
so I have to open that cage and speak to the monster, I have to learn about the monster, dive into the monsters veins and feel every fiber. I cannot be afraid to do that, of the monster will sense that and use my fears and grow more dangerous.
so I have to stand my ground and listen. Really fucking listen. Learn everything about my monster. Then and only then do I feed the monster properly. Speaking with my monster, allowing the monster to talk. This monster, is my monster and only I. Yes just I, this is not a joint battle. Most make it good.
Monsters can be good and be used for good and not destruction. My monster has to be allowed to feel the sun, not shoved in a dark damp cage, feeding on dead words and deeds. For me to be the person I want to be not need but want I have break the monster free. Will I bleed as it lashes at me? Most definitely. Will it strip flesh from me? Most certain. Will it devour me? Only if I let it rage in darkness. I must get angry and yell back at my monster. Not some pussy scream, but a scream that is so deep and loud that only I can hear. I have to be angry, super angry, a anger filled with rage. Nose to nose a scream. That is my monster
So with beyond shaking hands I’m opening the cage and letting the monster out. I will rage with the monster learning a my evils and then can I be who I am to be. I know I am good, and it’s worth finding. I open that cage and let the monster feed on me. Feed on my thought, my words, my actions past and future. Then is when the monster will let me see. I must see the monster as a whole and the monster will shape me into good, for I am the monster. This monster is mine. No one else’s. So no one else can tame the monster.
