Or: missing the scene, where I've been, and how I feel.
*This is copied from my profile on a different site, though I tend to get the best advice from those who read blogs here so I thought I would repost it*
It's been some time since I have been active on here.
Long story (not sooo) short: I was in a relationship, there did happen to have a kink side to it, and it was wonderful. It changed my life, heart, and also showed me some beautiful things about how BDSM dynamics can so strengthen a relationship.
Now I am home in the US. I graduated. I have a career in social work.
I miss kink, especially rope, so badly.
But I'm also nervous to explore this side of me at home. I know I have options, in the bigger city or another munch outside of my immediate community.
But I feel tender.
Not in a good way.
I've come to realize how deeply rooted, spiritual, even, BDSM is for me. Putting myself out there again feels terrifying. Nearly as terrifying as dating after a failed relationship.
But I need rope as much as I need to have coffee every morning (a non-negotiable necessity!)
I tried self-tying... But the sub-high and drop is so intense for me that I worry about my mental health. That is to say: I have attempted to, but the couple of times I have the aftermath has either been A) so emotional it almost negated the positive B) possibly dangerous.... Once I tied too tightly though I thought I wasn't (I prefer to feel like a cozy lil baby bird in a very constrictive nest lol) and had some pain after, for instance.
Anyway.
A long-winded cry for advice and opinion.
Xx Ivy