There's been alot going on with me and in my life over the last 6-8 months. It feels like its reaching towards a breaking point and I know that will end up being because of me. My mind has been quite chaotic and I'm not sure what to do about it. Realizing new things about me little by little. Today I wondered just how far I have come so I looked up my original bdsm tests and re-did the test today.. And wow! Did not expect the vastly HUGE difference between my first test and now. It's scary and I have no idea how to talk to master about it.
However, it does validate what I have been feeling inside, that I'm not the same person I was when my Master and I met and even a year ago.... So now knowing this I still don't know what to do next.... I know I will need to talk to my Master about everything but 1: worried about hurting him and 2: I don't want to say anything until I can figure it out myself... Nothing like having a super serious conversation and not knowing the direction you need to take it in.
So yeah, here I am at a crossroads and not sure exactly what it all is that I want/need anymore, not sure how to approach and talk to Master about it, and just plain scared of the whole situation 😞 Definitely in need of some kind of guidance but I honestly not sure where to turn to😞😞😞😞😞