No one tells you how you're going to handle it if someone close to you comes down with something as crippling as dementia or alzheimers. I got to learn that first hand when my mother was diagnosed earlier this year and now that I've spent quite a bit of time taking care of her it's devastating.
It has literally changed my life in ways that I can't even comprehend at this point. And honestly, I don't see that changing back to my old normal anytime soon... unless the worst happens, and I can't even begin to fathom that.
It's just odd to me that in my 44 or so years of life, I have cared for people, been to war, finished my graduate degree, rise up the corporate ladder (still climbing), been the trainer/leader/Dominant partner my lifestyle partners needed... and nothing was nearly as all encompassing hard, time consuming or emotionally draining than caring for the woman that brought me into this world while she becomes something far less than the intelligent, decisive, goofy feminist (sometimes to her detriment) that I always knew.
It's made my life more of a shell at this point too, as I typically work, sleep, eat, and care for her now.
I used to have time for the important things in my life... like the lifestyle and my hobbies and now... well, it is what it is.
Only came on here to vent because yesterday I realized that the look she's adopted when she's resting reminds me of a feral animal, confused ad to what's going on and it rips me apart to know I can do nothing to stop it.
