16 more days...
Sounds like a long time. I know it’s really not...but at this moment it feels like forever.
Nights are the hardest for me. You see...when we are together he holds me tight all night...we rotate back and forth holding each other. Our bodies touching everywhere. We even hold hands while we sleep! Even when I’m like a fireball...he still holds me. He rocks me out of my nightmares when they come on...I have less of them when he’s with me.
I dread nighttime when he’s gone. It’s the loneliness time. Even with pillows all around me...it’s still hard to sleep...and I’m a sleeper!!! I miss his breathing...his soft skin...his smell. How did I ever sleep without him before??
My bedtime routine is just not right when I don’t have his chest to lay on...listening to his heart beat...studying his face...and kissing him goodnight...getting to hear the sweet “I love you” in the middle of the night when he thinks I’m asleep. Getting the videos of me sleeping and snoring sent to my phone ....
I review every picture every night...just to ease my anxiety and have all the mental pictures before I close my eyes. I refresh my pillow with his cologne to try and be with him while I sleep.
16 more days...
Until tomorrow.
