so my current avatar picture....has generated quite a bit of activity for me both here and on fet.
and i do the dance with them when they want to talk. the emails can be interesting.
so the reality is some guys just want to get laid and will lie about anything to get you to meet them face to face.
so for those of us looking for serious play partners it can be really problematic.
for example a recent exchange went like this:
him: is your mind always in the gutter like me lol
me: well my gutter is labeled B D S M
him: do you love to roleplay and be spanked roughly
me: yes but im not a one night stand
him: im hoping you want weely consistent play? (and thats a line of bullshit it wont go beyond a week)
me: i do and everyone says they do but its never the case. what are your kinks? what does someones ass look like when you are done with it?
him: bright ass red are you a moaner or screamer
me:been trained to be as quiet and respectful as possible
him: what if i told you i want you being loud and whimpering
me: im not an actress
him: do you like to be watcched as you play with your pussy
me:yes
him: send me a face pic
me: you will get one if i decide to meet you. we have just begun to chat. im not a whore. im looking for serious play partners. not guys looking for a one night stand or the thrill of scoring an older woman
and i can guarantee you that no one has called me ugly
(but i sent the picture of me dressed as a pirate wench)
him: you look naughty..how tall are you
me: 5'2"im a good naughty girl..vanilla with a twist. my idea of fun is got giving random blow jobs to guys for half assed attempts to pretend to be a dominant.
its not how i have fun.
.........silence.......
me: see thats why i dont send face pics
but dont worry ..im sure there is a whore out there somewhere just waiting for you.
so Here is the teaching lesson.
first of all ....he very rarely answered my questions....thats a huge red flag. if they do this to you how do you think they will treat you in real person.
his reference to being in the gutter translates to......im looking for sex with no strings attached aka one night stand
the reference to consistent play means....oh maybe you will whore me on a regular basis...i would like that
he never assured there would be consistent play...translates too...im gonna treat you like a whore at least one time
asking about moaning or screaming.....and then wanting loud and whimpering....another sign he wants to use you for sex.
the picture thing translates to ....im gonna wank tonight to your picture so im already using you as a whore
whether you like it or not
which is why i sent a halloween picture of me with another guy.....to send the message that im not desperate for him...remind him i dont need him or his cock
height.....that was all about making me conscious of my height....i am short therefore i am only good to service him and give him what he wants. i can then be thrown away
he doesnt want a kinkster....he isnt even remotely kinky....he is just an asshole looking for free sex and prolly using women to make himself feel better when he gets over on them.
if he was kinky he would have taken the opportunity to tell me what turns him on bdsm wise and he would have been touching himself the whole time.
this is why i talk as much as possible about peoples kinks. i want all the subs out there to hear how people with kinks talk about their kinks and how they feel. i want subs to be able to pick up on when someone wants a whore and isnt really kinky.
i want subs to stop being taken advantage of.
and i want them to be smarter and wiser and able to out walk and talk the assholes out there.
and since i am in a teaching mode here ...lets talk about profiles. you have every right to look at anyones profile but read them ...there will always be clues to their nature. and look at pictures. anyone who posts pictures that look professional dont have pictures of their own.
if you see spanking pictures and there are two bright red spots on the butt cheeks the person has a horrible spanking technique and if you let them spank you .....it will be very painful with no eroticism in it.
more importantly .just because someone reaches out to you..it does NOT mean that you are obligated to have anything to do with them. insist on talking to them and really pay attention to the shit they tell you. dont rush into anything with anyone. make them really talk to you.
the assholes that want to use you as a whore will spend very little time before deciding you wont sex them.
