Thoughts

CK45​(sub female) - ~big hugs~ NOS.
I’m new-ish here as well but have faced similar.
Please take this with a grain of salt and understand this is only my opinion.
Take things day by day. The PTSD and abuse in your past I feel needs to be dealt with separetly then once under control with the right Dom.
One thing I would do if I were you first is to change your name to Someone Special. We all are...you included dear ❤️
Self talk...self parenting. I slip often but ty to be aware of it.
The right Dom will come after...if you jump in too soon you might get hurt and nobody wants that.
😘
ck

Morley​(sub female){Max Sterne} - CK 45 you took the words right out of my mouth. Yes, PLEASE as CK45 says, change your name, WE ARE ALL SOWCIAL IN SOME WAY, THAT INCLUDES YOU!!!!!!

I have also been through abuse, it all, but I sought counselling and work on myself daily. That is something very important you need to do. Take care of YOU, take time to heal and grow.

If you ever want, please message me, I am a good ear and will be there for you.

Again PLEASE CHANGE YOUR NAME ❤️🤗❤️🤗❤️🤗❤️🤗❤️

Satindragon - You have found the right community to help you sort through some of these questions. First and foremost you survived the abuse. You are worthy of all the happiness you can find. PTSD from abuse is a devil to deal with. Take your time. Do not become a victim here. No one should ever badger you when you speak to them. Don't call anyone Sir until he has earned it. Don't send nude photos just because someone ask. Don't let anyone belittle you at any time. When you have found a person worthy of all your secrets, all the hurt you can start working toward something special. This takes time. Remember that this lifestyle is built on trust and communications. Educate yourself on BDMS and talk to us, we are here to help.

alawey​(sub female){(OWNED BY } - Ok hun first off . my heart goes out to you for having to deal with this in ur past.

But as someone who was married to an abuser for way to long. Trust me that it takes time to recover and built back ur self worth so that others can not shatter it
And i agree take ur time being u. Dont rush into anything dont share to much at first when talking to those running to try and claim u.

Sorry i have more i would like to share with you . although im at work and my break is up.
Feel free to reach out any time

Pumpkin29​(sub female){MrWhite} - You've got some good advice already, and I'm going to offer a potentially unpopular opinion here...Punishment doesn't *HAVE* to be a part of your dynamic. It's not part of mine, for similar reasons. While that may not necessarily be traditional, it's all about what works for you and your Dom together. A sensitive and creative Dom can learn you well enough to correct you without it being a "punishment."
As you grow, you may decide you're ready to step in those directions, but it's also ok if you never do. The right person will help you in all the right ways.

Morley​(sub female){Max Sterne} - *** Stands and claps loud***

So very well said Pumpkin! ❤️

alawey​(sub female){(OWNED BY } - So. True!!!!!.

Also i may add that "punishment"
Dose not always mean spankings , being whipped or flogged or any of those kink type things.
I know with just a look from wolf. And knowing i screwed up is so much worst to me.
And i know other some subs who are given writing assignments ( cough cough) , and i even knew a young one who had to do lines . like when we were school." I will not talk in class" ect