Accessional diary of a dyslexic dom.

Any old nonsence that comes into my head.

I try not to blog about religion or politics as there is the old chestnut about offence, which I work so hard to avoid, but in this instance I am not quite sure if this blog is about religion, philosophy or morality. A lot of people disagree, but I personally think that Buddhism is a religion: They believe in hell (as well as reincarnation) and they have gods. The only difference to western religions is that there gods don't seem to do anything.

Anyway the question (that we discussed at my meditation class yesterday) is it ever all right to lie. The Buddha never lied (I mean from the time that he became the budder. I do not know if he lied before that). Silence is fine, indeed stillness and silence are consider an important part of Buddhist life. So he could just say nothing, or I think there are stories of him answering a question with another question, but he never lied,

But lets remember that he believed in hell and being reincarnated as a dung Beatle, but what if you don't believe in all that? If you lie to a close friend or relative and they find out, then they might not trust you in the future. Also, in curtain situations, no one is quite sure wether it is more considerate to lie or to tell the truth.So what about lying to a stranger? You are never going to see them again.

Most people know the story of Ann Frank, but incase you don't, during the war a group of jews hid in a seller, and were hidden and brought food by the people who lived in the house below. If a soldier knocked on the door and said have you seen any Jews? The downstairs people would have to lie. Did Budder consider this kind of dilemma. Did he even know that things could be that bad?

Personally I make a conscious effort not to lie, but I still do, little white lies, or that is what I think (maybe lying to my self), but very occasionally lying can become a survival technical. When I was a child, if a bigger, or more aggressive looking, kid approached me on a bus and said "what football team do you support"? The answer was all ways "What team do you support" and whatever he said I would agree enthusiastically.

What if I had insisted on all ways telling the truth. I might get an accessional black aye and other bad things might happen once in a while. However the reword would be to live in a world of constant, unadulterated truth. Truth, along with ethical behave, can create a clarity of mind.

Now I must go, I have a dinner engagement with a unicorn and a talking fish.

Bunnie - Comment deleted by poster.

4 years ago

Bunnie - *edited*

This does appear to be an age-old dilemma.

I once (even not that long ago) spoke out very openly and somewhat aggressively around my distaste for people lying.

Something I have come to understand is that I am fortunate enough to be able to live in a way where lying is a choice (my life or those close to me doesn’t depend on the outcomes of my answers).

I choose to not lie. However, I am also very grateful to have that choice :)

4 years ago

Justme26 - @Bunnie: Presumable you have also put a lot of energy into creating an environment that is conducive to the truth, but it is not all ways easy, with family for example.

Yes it is a very old subject. It just happened to be on my mind today.

4 years ago

Bunnie - I made a decision quite some time ago to always be honest. I come from a family of people who believe so strongly that little white lies are ok, that I have realised that they’re no longer capable of even recognising what is a lie anymore. This breaks my heart. It also makes me never trust their word. Which also makes me sad. I want to... but why would I trust anything they say?

I realised that I want my word to be stronger than that. It has taken a lot of learning on how to communicate. I still stuff it up and hurt feelings and come across the wrong way and have things misinterpreted... however I would still to this day much prefer that than for someone to not be sure of whether or not my word was trustworthy. That’s the choice I made, and I have had to work damn hard to achieve that. I still do... because something else I have come to learn is that it’s ongoing. I think often what happens is that people just want to choose the easy way. I know that’s what I realised for myself anyway.

4 years ago

Justme26 - Another consequence of this is that, in the end, the person who is lying dose not know what is true and what isn't.

4 years ago

AKittenforSir(sub female){JohnBond} - Generally, no, I don’t think lying is acceptable behavior; even the little white lies. But as with every rule, I do believe there are the rare exceptions. If, like in the Anne Frank example you gave, I had to lie for the survival of my family members or loved ones then I would accept the immorality of lying for what I believed to be the greater good - their safety.

4 years ago

Literate Lycan(dom male) - I thought on this long and hard. And my short answer . . . It depends. I’m not walking in anyone else’s shoes and don’t know their life. As you pointed out with the story of Anne Frank, there are times for the greater good, you might find yourself in a position to lie to protect or defend others. Say in High School or college, you may lie and not tell your friends you hooked up with a girl or guy, so to protect their reputation? But as a rule, I’d say at least be completely honest with ones self. If that happens, we will probably find we don’t have to lie o

4 years ago

Justme26 - @literate Lycon. Buddha was one of several philosophers who felt / feel that there is no room for compromise at all. This can seem very extreme but the results can be quite startling. If you are going to sleep with someone and then lie about it, you do have the option of just not sleeping with them. OK you are 16, your hormones are going crazy and you might not get another chance, but all I'm saying is that it is an option (I know what I would do).

@Bunny. I'm curies what your take on this is (because your approach is quite unusual).

4 years ago

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Justme26

Accessional diary of a dyslexic dom.

Is it ever OK to lie.