Some of this is a bit stream of conshesnes, rambeling self pity, please excuse spelling, enjoy:
It is 1. 30 in the afternoon here in the sunny UK (I do not know if it is raining but it is quite overcast), I have things I should be doing but, as you can see, I am not doing them. Later I will probably turn on the TV. I think I have been ghosted again (on that other site). I really had hopes for this one. It is worse when they exchange half a dozen messages with me and then just disappear. It means they have given me a chance and decided that I am not even worth a "sorry, no thanks".
I am not going to apologise for sounding like a whiny school girl, but I do realise that I sound like that (by the way anyone who's advice is "grow up", "pull yourself together" or "snap out of it", can please go away). I know I keep saying this but maybe I should just give it up. It is not really helping me to trust people, to like people. It is hard to play a positive role in the world when I am constantly being / feeling rejected.
On top of that my paintings have suddenly gone horribly wrong. A few weeks back I was doing, what I thought was, some of the best stuff I have ever done (although I suspect that most people would not see it). Now suddenly I can hardly produce a doodle (seriously).
And don't get me started on politics (no really, its best not to). Ow well, as Spike Milligan said: It will only go on for ever.
PS: I think I will try the TV. Maybe there is an old film on, or maybe I will watch a DVD.
