My journey

K y i v - Sometimes fantasy is not enough and it must move to reality...

Devotedsub​(sub female){His} - The fantasy and online aspect is more than adequate for me, given my home situation. Even if it changed, I believe it would be enough as I believe the imagination is a powerful thing. The struggle is accepting and understanding how the loss of a Dom/Master is so much different from loss of a vanilla partner. It really is.

K y i v - It takes 2 to tango as they say. Finding that Dom who settles for online may be a struggle.

Devotedsub​(sub female){His} - Not difficult at all actually. There are many, many willing. Our thoughts and values may not line up, but that happens in rl as well.

Scooby Alpha​(dom male){bratlitpri} - Hmmm. If you are willing and able to learn, then it was due to their inability to train, not because you weren't good enough. If they don't have patience, well I will keep my opinion to myself, but you should never be left to feel that way.

Devotedsub​(sub female){His} - Nahh, they always find something better. And, in one case it is partially my fault because I knew it was not committed and he would go back to her as always. I'm giving my gift of submission to the wrong ones, I guess. I'm just never good enough

Scooby Alpha​(dom male){bratlitpri} - Don't doubt yourself. Just be petient.

Bunnie - Whilst online can seem very real (well... at least unless it’s considered cheating... then somehow it suddenly becomes acceptably “fantasy” lol), oftentimes it’s not sustainable as an endless ongoing thing. I’m not saying don’t do it... I’m simply saying be prepared for the possibility that it may be more “fluid” or “transient” than what you’d expect compared to offline relationships.

Keep in mind that others seeking online are probably in a similar situation to yourself... unable to fully commit... for whatever reasons that may be. If you simply accept it for what it is, and enjoy it for what you can both have together... without trying to change the rules... it can be some fun and fulfilling kinky experiences for all involved, for however long it lasts.

Devotedsub​(sub female){His} - This is very true. Ohhh these people seem to be able to commit online ...even when they are in similar situations, but not to me. But certainly things can happen where things dont work out.

Bunnie - So often we’re told it’s not us, it’s them. This is such bullshit in my opinion. It takes two. In my opinion, everything that happens is an opportunity for learning and growth. If you feel that there are behaviours that affected the relationship, look into them and see if it’s something you can work on.

We seek these relationships to grow within ourselves and to learn to become better versions of ourselves... and yet so many run and hide from this responsibility. If you can learn to embrace it, you may just find your experiences shifting to a new level. Good luck :)

Devotedsub​(sub female){His} - Oh yes, they always say it's not you. But it clearly has to be if they always move along. Most will find they made a mistake, as I am a very faithful and loyal sub and take it seriously, even being online. Some won't understand that and I get it. I feel I am starting things that I know won't work out from beginning but I get wrapped up in it. Not smart. Also, I am very funny about taking my time.. If the situation doesn't seem right and I don't feel a click... I move on. Which makes sense, but I may miss out on opportunities that may be good for me. I don't know.
I do feel I have grown as a person and have more self confidence from the two Dom/sub relationships I have been in so all isn't a loss.
Thanks for writing and listening Bunnie.

Scooby Alpha​(dom male){bratlitpri} - You bring up a good point Bunnie. In D/s relationship, you should both be providing feedback.