Wise thoughts

Over the years of my opportunities, I’ve learned one thing that really helps me out. Communication is king.

This is true in any relationship: work, school, home, family , friends, D/s. Yes, D/s requires communication. 

You may think it’s simply saying things , and being honest (yes no) or any other form of communication. But communication has two things : Input and output. 

I will use a transistor as a example: 

https://circuitdigest.com/article/pnp-transistor

We have the emitter (our mouths) the collector (our ears) and then the base (the relationship) . The only way the base fundamentals of any relationship works out , is if we both listen and talk  to eachother. 

Are you doing a lot of talking? Are you doing a lot of listening ? You doing a bit of both? 

See ya later, space cowboy.

This is quite literally my first jump into the bdsm community. I was introduced to the reality by my mentor. 

Ill start by saying this, my intentions are never to cause others to stumble. My intentions are never to step on others feet. I strait up just talk a lot. 

I learned of a unspoken rule recently, last night in fact. I wont go into detail on it, but I won’t do it again that’s for sure. 

Is there a pamplet I can pick up on the way in? Is there a compilation of unspoken rules listed somewhere? Inquiring minds have got to know (mine). 

Anyone reading this wants to set me on the strait and narrow so I don’t have a similar situation come up in the future, that would be wonderful if ya posted that in private or bond. 

I just want to fit in, and I felt like I was doing well all things considering. 

Thanks bunches folks.

ya never know which one is filled with cayenne and glass shards? I swear that’s right..at least seven tenths of the time! 

Im gonna be real, whenever any of my prospects show up, the genuine ones are pretty much are not planned. It’s always surprising how it happens too. 

One moment im joking, the next thing things get serious. Not like ...”get down on your knees” but like, really getting to know eachother. 

As an advice to everyone involved, both sides, you got questions? Ask. Ask every question, even the stupid ones. 

The worst the person can say is, or should be: “I’m not comfortable enough yet.” That is real , take them at their word. 

One last thing: honesty is important, don’t sugar coat things. Words like “always” , “forever” , “never” , or any definites or indefinites spoken at the beginning need to be discussed.

Let your words mean what you say, and let you say what you mean. 

Stay classy, San Diego. 

I am new to the community, so I’ll start like this: when I first heard this term I was like “a mythical creature with a horn on its head that closely resembles a horse, generally rumored that it’s blood if drank would grant immortality?” Cause my brain is just very logically driven. 

When I heard what it was, outright, it made much more sense to me. I was just like huh, yeah I hope that there is a unicorn out there for me.

But then I rescended my words...unicorn is basically a impossibility, a irregularity when it comes to the submissive being “perfect.” If my submissive was perfect, in every bit of the word, she wouldn’t need me. 

So I guess what I’m saying is this: there is someone out there that is perfect for me*. I am far from perfect, I have many flaws and I am not afraid to admit them. I have come a long ass way from the ignorant man that I was 7 years ago when my first prospect came up. I don’t expect her to be perfect either. But what we become when we connect, I mean really connect, we become better people. 

Imagine if bdsm was entirely singularly structured, then there would be no community. Imagine if for a second that bdsm was just one aspect of the whole, then there would be no submissives there would be no dominants. 

I’ll leave you with this, I have done this before with opportunities that never have left the helipad so to speak: 

( No, I literally didn’t kill them, I just smothered them. )

When you are strange, no one remembers your name? 

I think they might have been wrong when it come to that song. I know I am one weird dude and seemingly people never forget me. 

Just a side note: I was a skinny little thing when it came to early elementary till middle school. The prescribed medicine I had kept me skinny, it was for my seizures and epileptic activity that was caused by a weird allergy. I'm kinda lucky to be alive, so every moment I'm thankful for that. 

So I grew up, gained quite a bit of poundage and then soon I'm walking around in a mall. I run into some girl I don't recognize and she stops bold face, and points at me. "You be that bad boy in my class." and I , a good wholesome Christian lad such as me made a strange look upon his face. "Pardon me?" "You be that bad boy in my class..." she then tsk tsk tsked me and walked away. 

If you went to my work right now, and walked around , my face is literally labeled in the weirdest places. Like, used as a ticket dispenser my lips were cut out on a cardboard cutout of me and strung stickers through it. Inside my trainee's desk the first thing he sees when he opens the drawer when its empty is a picture of his trainer. 

I guess I'm kinda a 'real life meme' so to speak. But this is kinda where I have to contradict with the whole narrative of that song 'People are strange.' I live the strange life, I am the oddity , I am outside of the norm. No one forgets this dork.

And that should perhaps tell that My personality is just strong, like a strong slice of Limburger cheese. Like a fish out of water. Perhaps even out of this world!

That's all for tonight folks, just remember: You'll never forget. 

did you think of a count down till blast off?! 

This post is going to be a bit short: since it’s not about me, it’s about you as a reader. 

So I’m going to ask 5 absolutely ridiculous questions to get to know people here better. Don’t be shy, if ya don’t wanna put them on my blog PM me.

first: Take your favorite movie, turn it into a porn film? Example: Mine is big trouble in little China, so  I just change one word “Big trouble in little Vagina.”

second: Give me a guilty pleasure that is so bizarre it is difficult for you to admit? Mine, playing a competitive game and bargaining with my partner who gives oral or receives depending on the outcome. (It’s not hard for me to admit this....just an example)

Third: If you were to pick one celebrity to be your partner, who would it be? Mine would be Kate Beckinsale, oh man 😳 what a babe. 

Fourth: If you were to be born in an era not today, what era would that be?? Victorian would be my choice. 

Finally: If you were to have a super power, what would it be? Mine: Multi-Man. 

-cups his hand up to his ear- Let’s hear it folks! 

I’ve always been big on work ethic. Ya know, busting my ass for the sweet reward of feeling accomplished. 

I’ve always been an amazing steward of my time, and of my work. Perhaps my lack of organizational skills confuse some, but I am a functioning work-a-holic. 

Ive recently gotten a promotion to “assistant to the row manager” no title change, but ya know I got a few perks from it. Example: being able to delegate. I have been so used to doing things on my own that when I found out I can point to my coworker and say “yo man, do this and email me when you are done,” it just kinda was like “I can do that?!” 

I guess the reason why I mention this, in work situations I’ve always been a lone wolf. Never having people to rely on to get things done. Now that I’m in this spot it just is tickling me pink, or whatever color I turn when I’m happy.

See, one thing I gotta say about myself : I’m a Gemini and I have a god complex. Kimidere if you will (for those familiar with the ‘lovy’s’), and it is a struggle holding some of that back. 

See it’s interesting, I’ve always been the ‘go to guy’ for fixing recipes in a book, training people how to make the perfect gelato, memorizing rediculously long numbers or obscure pass phrases. Now I’m the guy that is kinda able to tell others what to do. 

Some might be asking how this connects to my dominant nature, well it’s a lot about who I am as a person. I am very tenacious, I am self sacrificing (from my previous post ‘A New Hope’ I go into detail how I sacrificed my sleep for my prospects peace of mind), I am by the book on most things. 

One more thing about myself: I have a hard time apologizing, not because it shows ‘weakness’ as Gibs says on NCIS, but because of pride. I have worked on that throughout my years and apologized to one of my subordinates just yesterday. 

I guess I’ll end with this statement, always be the best you can be. If you can’t , be honest with yourself and whoever it might affect. 

See ya later, space cowboy. 

Though some might say I've had an easy life, I've always struggled with the simple. What I mean by that is, things that seem obvious to others don't come to me. Not that I'm oblivious or outright ignorant, but that It's literally impossible for me to look at something and see the simple answer. 

I over complicate things, frequently, from tying my shoes to buckling my shirts, I make it more difficult than it needs to be. I over think things, I worry about things that aren't difficult, or things that are not super important. 

Let me explain why this matters: I had an opportunity to take in a particularly broken individual. She was a sweetheart, I gave her opportunity to come up with her pet name, she chose doe. She was very much like a doe, energetic..fun but very shy. Easily frightened too. 

This sadly didn't work out, and my first reaction in every situation that doesn't work out is blame myself. I did exactly that. I went back, looked at all the messages, conversed with my mentor about it. I thought I was at fault: that I pushed her too hard, I put too much pressure on her, or I forced her into something that she didn't want. 

However, upon re-examining the situation, I know for a fact I did nothing wrong. I would say it was a flawless victory, but here I am with a empty lap and more questions than answers. This victory was more about myself than anything where she ,though my focus and hopefully prize at the end of the tunnel, was taking the side car of the whole situation. 

I was fighting a lot of her demons, it felt like Scott pilgrim vs the world at times. Lots of compromises were made, lots of 'i'll settle for that' on both of our counts. There was a moment where I should have realized where it was going south: she mentioned how "no one is ever there forever." This statement was her having second thoughts about 'us', which we were still in the get to know you stage. Followed by: "I'll always be your brat." Trying to distract me from the obvious, that she was having doubts. 

I could have been bitter at her, however...thanks to her I feel like I've come to understand the importance of aftercare better. Staying up till 4 am all through the week so that she could go to sleep. I really cared for her, and still do. I wish her the best in her life, seeing as I am no longer a part of it. 

I realized at this point that the community I was a part of, a Role Play community, is not where I should go to make lasting relationships. I can still be a positive uplifting individual, however my talents are wasted on most. This is where it has brought me to this place. The Cage, of course never been in someplace like this. 

This is a new beginning for me, a new hope. I thank you for being such a welcoming community for me. I am looking forward to getting to know those in this group.