Truth be told

Now that I have everyone’s attention, why is it that when it’s made very clear no sex is to be had, and the person claims to agree and want to be friends also to build trust, they disappear after being told no sex of any kind, including FaceTime?

Is it the thrill of the chase? Is it the predator hunting his prey? Is it the lie about what you want and then try to change their mind and you get what you want? 

What ever happened to being genuine, open, and honest? Especially in this lifestyle where there is so much at risk, stake and involved? Yes, I do believe there is. What we experience and share is so much greater and deeper than an ordinary vanilla relationship. We put our mental, emotional and physical health into someone’s hands. 

For me, it’s not all about the sex. I have an extremely high drive, but I exercise self-control. I am not going to put myself in harms way or jeopardize or compromise myself for a good fuck! That may be the case for some, and everyone’s motives and intentions are different, but for Pete’s sake tell the person what they are and don’t lie or mislead. 

I’m starting to conclude that being here is no different than being in the vanilla world when it comes to finding someone compatible with the same interests. At the end, seems like sex is all they want. They tell you want you want to hear until they get what they want or disappear when they don’t. Oh, and yes, I do know this is a sex website...but, if that’s all your looking for and want, say so and don’t contact me. Read my profile thoroughly, I am very clear in what I am looking for.

The only sex I will be having is going to be with myself, so don’t ask. It’s a turn off when people disrespect my wishes. 

TGIFF!!!

Inspiration, when your spirit awakens and you begin to see things in a different light. Your perspective changes, your open to the possibilities. The feelings that arise within motivates you to pursue what you may have thought was unattainable or unrealistic. 

I want to explore more of myself, try things I haven't tried because I have been afraid. I want to do it with someone I can trust, who is not out to just gain for themselves, but who is looking to grow and can with me sharing in the magical experiences that come with this lifestyle. I want to build a life with someone that wants the same, someone who can take lead and charge where I want to give it, someone who will also respect me for the person I am and not try to change me to meet their own selfish needs. I have found it interesting on how quickly you can weed out those who claim to what the same, until you take sex off the table. 

I want a connection beyond the physical. If you want my submission, then you need to prove to me that you are worthy of it. I know who and what I am and will only give it to the right person. I don't play games. Except for those we both can enjoy. My mind needs to be enticed and stimulated, not just arouse it sexually because it won't work, it's actually a turn off. Capture my mind and the rest will follow because, trust me, this pet will not just follow you around. 

Let's see how far I go...

Why do things have to be so complicated or is it that we are the ones who make it so? 

I am a hands on kind of person...something needs to get done, I’ll jump in and get right on it. I don’t like to wait, But when it come to relationships, where I have been burnt and pretty good, even after having taken it slow, right now I feel like I’m stuck in neutral - idling.

I want to move on, but I am hesitant. I want to jump in and take the risk, but I am fearful because once you have had the real thing and they’ve broken the most precious gift you could have given any other human being - how can one not be almost paralyzed and immobile?

Then when you make the attempt to step back in, you meet a liar right out of the gates. Makes you more than apprehensive when you were open and genuine about the very thing you were hurt by. It saddening and upsetting that people can have no shame and intentionally hurt others, especially in this lifestyle where trust is a building block of a D/s dynamic. Yes, things still stings and not in a good way. 

Along comes this pretty awesome guy who seems to understand me and is respecting my wishes to take it slow, who I have given several outs and he hasn’t taken them. I know that everyone is different, they are their own person and no one should be judged by others mistakes and will remind myself of that because he does deserve to be given that chance. 

While I am idling, he is softening my heart and letting me see who he is. Making me feel comfortable little by little. I hope to be able to shift to drive soon, and see where he takes me. After all, can’t enjoy the possibilities just sitting there - well, perhaps just for a little while.

After my fiasco, I was hesitant to talk to someone else, but I did. We seem to have hit the off, both definitely want the same things and have similar interests. He’s funny, playful, smart, sexy, very talented, and makes me smile and I look forward to his messages. He IS open AND honest. He understands my need to take things slow and build upon a friendship first. There are no games or expectations. 

I’m a curious kitten and with a very inquisitive mind that I tend to ask a lot questions, especially when I meet someone. Isn’t that how you get to know a person? He was such a great sport in answering my 100 questions the other day, that in return I had to answer them also with some additional ones. Did not see that coming. Lol One of the questions brought up a conversation today in which it prompted me to start a dialogue revealing things about myself. Not negatively, but more informative. Well, I think I scared him and he may have run for the hills. 🤦🏼‍♀️ I offered and let him now the door is open for him to go at any given moment. I’d rather they know it’s an option than ghosting me. 

I haven’t heard from him since this morning and I’m almost gun shy to reach out. This is the part I do not like of having to start over. My brain has already resolved to him checking out. I’m already missing him and can’t stop thinking about him. And, I can not stop but to wonder - can it be him? Can he be the one? 

I will have to let it rest for night and see what tomorrow brings. 

Good night to y’all.

I have been on here for some time enjoying reading and chatting with people. Recent events inspired this short story after my interactions with a dom here who approached me. I typically do not engage, but he intrigued me, with a very impressive profile, enough to strike a conversation with, but unfortunately, due to his blatant dishonesty, the conversation ended. The most upsetting part of my interaction was the fact that I openly shared an issue which prompted me to ask him my specific question that come to find out he straight out lied about. And then people wonder why people have trust issues. However, though as brief as our conversation may have been, he did give me a lot to consider about what I wanted further and that what I hold to be real and true, as this lifestyle is NOT a game for me, are values and standards that are non-negotiable; trust, truth, honesty, openness, communication...to name a few.

What does this story mean? That although you, as a dom, may be able to take a submissive down a journey or path of wonder where she experiences total complete ecstasy both mentally and physically...remember this, that when you commit the ultimate betrayal, all those memories and moments are tainted and erased to be forgotten, no matter how good they were making you her worst nightmare come true.

She walked slowly down the forbidden path with apprehension, but curious as to what waited for her. He had given her a small taste of what was yet to come. With every step her body temperature rises with the anticipation wondering if what he offered was real. She could feel the fire within rising as his words replayed in her ears drawing her closer feeling the moisture between her legs trying to squeeze them tight. She was captivated by the sound of his voice that was alluring and almost bewitching. Her nipples hardening with excitement, her breathing labored as she imagines his touch already forgetting why she shouldn't go down the path, but she had to see because she was too intrigued. She was finding it hard to resist him as she could hear him calling her. The mastery of his words pulling her closer and closer as he begins to posses her mind as she thinks, how can that be possible? The hunger is now growing seeking desperately to be touched and explored. The ache and pulse needing to be satisfied. She's surprised to feel the wetness dripping down her leg that the urgency now arises to reach the end with no hesitation to find that mental release and escape to submit before him. As she approaches the end of the path, she suddenly stops as panic begins to ensue as her mind retreats unsure. But her body ignores the warnings betraying her as she succumbs to his spell releasing all inhibitions letting go of those inner deep desires to please the man who has captured her heart feeling the waves of pleasure overtake her body.  As she awoke from her slumber, the ultimate betrayal followed when her mind erased it all...

Be kind to one another.