This is always the kind of thing that happens when I try to have fun hahaha!
Give me your opinions.
Find the post referenced in the recording here: "Hearing Loss"
Oooh! About to pop my voiceblog cherry.
Gonna break my voiceblog hymen.
What to say... what to say... How about this:
I have no idea what made me think of these things...
Did anyone else ever do this? -
Borrow your uncle's old, used van, and get together with your stoner buddies. You'd wait for everyone to climb in, roll up the windows, hot-box the shit out of it, and pass out on the mattress on the floor in the back.
Or this? -
Move into your first apartment, dead broke, with a shitty minimum wage job. Since you couldn't afford grown-up bedroom furniture you had to arrange a dozen milk crates on the floor to serve as a frame AND box spring and laid the mattress on top.
Or am I the only one?
Thanks to SensualDom for this challenge
There were so many images that I could have picked. Pictures of a Sadist, or a Degrader, or a Daddy.
It all comes down to the same thing.
Those who know me might even be surprised at the one I chose, but it is very simple.
She doesn't have to be bound, or collared, covered in bodily fluids, or even naked.
She only needs to know her place. I'll do the rest.
This is not going to be one of them silly, lighthearted things for which I am well known. Nope, sometimes shit just isn't funny. I'll explain:
My feet are always super freezing cold so I usually sleep with my socks on. When I woke up today I noticed that one was missing.
(a sock, not a foot.)
So to be fair I took off the other one and threw it on the floor.
(the other sock, not the other foot.)
Seriously.
WARNING - No Triggers Ahead!
And you know what else is funny?
With all the talk about about them and how we should or shouldn't put them at the beginning of our posts,
have you noticed that the one word which never seems to trigger anyone is -
"Trigger"
The fuck?
Irony at it's best.
First was that awful White Shirt challenge. SOMEONE (she knows who she is) kinda made it so that I could no longer avoid taking part in it I mean thankfully finally participate in it. Since then I started to like the challenges and have accepted a few more.
I am actually a week late, and pt.2 has already been issued (I'll get to that soon) but here is my entry for TKP's
Getting To Know You Challenge (the first one)
For most of these it will be impossible to narrow down to just one answer, and later today I'll remember 37 other answers that would have been just as good.:
1. My favorite childhood toy(s):
Silly putty, Spirograph, Wooly Willy, Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots, Rubik's Cube, Etch a Sketch.
2. Favorite album:
I'm just gonna stick with childhood faves because by now there are sooooo many to choose from.
The Beatles 1962 - 1966 (the blue one)
The Beatles 1967 - 1970 (the red one)
3. Favorite childhood TV show:
I was definitely a fan of Sid and Marty Krofft shows like H.R. Pufnstuf, Lidsville, Sigmund and the Seamonsters, Land of the Lost (the actual original tv show.)
And later it was all the usual shows - Brady Bunch, Love Boat, Fantasy Island, 6 Million Dollar Man, Bionic Woman. I'm surely forgetting 100 others.
4. First film at the cinema:
I think it was Grease, and at an actual drive-in like in the movie.
5. First crush Celebrity and Personal:
Celebrity - Had to be Farrah Fawcett. I was madly in love with her when I was... 9yo?
Personal - Probably my 1st grade girlfriend Stacy when I was... 7yo?
6. Favorite animal:
Monkey. That was an easy one.
7. Favorite film:
Again, I'm just gonna stick with childhood faves because by now there are sooooo many to choose from.
As a kid my fave was either Rocky or Star Wars (the original 1977 movie, later to be retitled as Star Wars, Episode IV – A New Hope.)
8. First kiss who and where:
I kissed my babysitter when I was... babysitter age. At home I assume.
9. First real contact with the kink world:
Ooh, this is a great story -
One day at school I told these best friends named Lily and Sonya to get on their knees. Once they had, I pissed on their faces and in their mouths. It happened while they were kneeling just inside the door to the girls bathroom so it wasn't weird.
I was... 8yo?
But as an adult it was in my early 20s with my first true love, the one you never forget. I pissed on her too.
10. Only one person to be left on a island with for a year, without any technology:
Easy answer - My kinky little Kitty!
(Or Farrah Fawcett when I was... 9yo?)
A big Thank You to TKP!
Next up, Part 2!
Show of hands - who didn't see this coming?
(No one raises their hand.)
That's because everyone saw it coming. It was never a question of if it would happen, it was simply a matter of time.
Predictably, the last several months have seen a spike in the average number of births. Widely attributed to the fact that while last year the whole world was experiencing some level of quarantine, instead of moaning about how they were stuck indoors staring at the walls, many people were instead asking each other "Hey, wanna fuck?"
Established couples, roommates, friends. For some, sex became a fun way to alleviate boredom; a much needed break in the monotony by way of good ol' fashioned fucking.
And why not? Sure, there was a lot of sexting and camming and mutual masked masturbation, we put a lot of extra mileage on all of our toys, and Amazon became everybody's favorite porn site.
But as 6in of hard expanded to 6ft of horny suddenly "we're all gonna die someday anyway" became a viable excuse to close the social distance.
Our urges overtook us, all manners and mixtures of genders and identities. But as is often the result when eggs and sperm collide - babies happened.
Enter 2021.
Until the birth certificate people catch up the gender choices will continue to be just "male" and "female" and according to the Social Security Administration, so far this year the most popular baby names are Liam for boys and Sophia for girls.
But there was also this other phenomenon, the thing we all saw coming. The appearance of neat little bundles of germs, so-called "virus babies."
Yep, you guessed it, people started naming their babies after the damn virus. Really.
Perhaps the highest profile example of this is a couple in India who named their twins, a boy and a girl, Covid and Corona. Interestingly, the couple said that they might someday give their babies more distinctive, traditionally gender-specific names, but for now the twins can easily be identified by their pink and blue masks.
(I confess, I made up that last part.)
Other examples from around the world are:
Lockdown (very dungeon party meets WWF)
Sanitiser (queue all the jokes about squirting into someone's hand.)
Tina, as in quarantine
Demi, as in pandemic
Rhona, as in corona
And a man who named his son Covid Bryant, after the late Kobe Bryant, who died in a helicopter crash in early 2020 just as the whole covid thingy was really taking off.
(Ok I feel bad about that pun. Sorry.)
I've never met or heard of anyone named Plague or AIDS or Smallpox or Cancer or Polio or Flu. But maybe the trend will continue and in the future we will commemorate all sicknesses and infections and diseases and maladies of every shape and symptom just by fucking them into the following year's SSA list of Most Popular Baby Names.
Fuck me I am so fucking tired of the whole fucking subject.
Yes, this is going to be yet another in a very long line of humorous musings about kink shaming, probably the dozenth one already posted today, all about how somebody made a stank face because they didn't like what gave someone else an erection, and how dare you expose me to it, and ewww poor fragile me because it's awful and icky.
But this time it happened under stranger than usual circumstances, and as the sole arbiter of what is sexy/bloggy I decided to plant my flag on the barely attainable high ground and use my chosen platform to rant about it.
Hereafter, at least for the duration of this post, kink shaming will be referred to as KS* because as much time as we spend droning on about it, launching strikes at it, or trying to defend ourselves against it, it really should have it's very own capitalized abbreviation. Like DDlg. Or GERD.
(*Not to be confused with SK which is the German death metal band Skunky Kunt that KB turned me onto recently hahah!)
In this case I was not directly involved in the KS and I don't actually know what happened. The two people at the center of this travelling circus told 2 people, and they told 2 people, and so on and so on and suddenly, before anyone could say "Faberge," the story had reached my doorstep. (Another vintage TV commercial reference. It's 1984 old school but still feels, y'know, fresh.) It was about the presumed not-niceness of a Dom based on his profile which had been misinterpreted by a overzealous, easily-angered sub.
I will not give the names of the 2 founding members of the band because it was their conversation and I don't want to mischaracterize them or their opinions. Plus, it was a disagreement about a profile and I really don't give a shit about something as meaningless as a disagreement about a fucking profile. We fill them out and we read them so that we can decide if we have an interest in the person behind the picture, not to confer sainthood on them.
IMPORTANT! - It is crucial at this moment to mention that to the best of my knowledge, during their exchange explanations were given and apologies were accepted. The conversation was ultimately very cordial, both players turned out to be very cool people, and the two said goodnight, each having come to respect the other's point of view. Awesome.
Please keep in mind that this is a wash, rinse, and 3rd person repeat account of the conversation. My understanding of it is as follows:
A Dom wrote a rather pointed and not very timid profile clearly outlining his greatest fetish: training subs who want to be broken, abused, and remade "perfect" by himself, all the while being used for his enjoyment and at his whim. Ok, I guess I can kinda see the allure of that. A sub then read it, didn't like it, and she fired off a solid condemnation of him and his point of view, calling him and his profile "disgusting." Her opinion was that he was one of them instas that has no knowledge or respect of the lifestyle and community.
Hers is an easy reaction to understand, and his (unnecessary) explanation was that having that sort of dynamic with that sort of sub is his biggest fetish. And it is interesting that, according to him, he has had many subs "Love" his ostensibly "disgusting" profile, and contact him with interest. I believe that because during my time in our community and in rl I have met enough people to know that it is not only possible, it is also not uncommon.
His profile was obviously not constructed at Build-a-Bear, his particular D/s style isn't really my ish, I've never read Insta-Dynamics for Dummies, and thankfully they got it all sorted. But if we are to say that KS is unacceptable can any of us truly have a problem with any profile - even it does come off as insta-dumbass as his?
Doesn't what she did count as shaming?
And if we go around balking at the things we see here, bitching about how one member fails to live up to our self-imposed standards of Domsmanship, or how another member falls well below even the lowest expectations of acceptable subbishness, aren't we judging their dynamic, and therefore their kinks, and shaming them in exactly the same manner that we hate when it happens to us?
Because if we are then I suggest that the templates for every profile and blog post, every forum, message, chat, and Bond, should prominently feature this warning sticker:
!CAUTION!
The following might hurt your feelings.
Maybe even real bad.
Continuing past this point indicates that you are a consenting adult who has already agreed to accept that risk, way back when you checked the box next to "I am legal, now let me in so I can get my kink on!"
If you do not agree with the above statement then immediately Stop, Block, and Roll.
(And maybe fuck off a little while you're at it.)
YES, I know there is a very big difference between KS and plain ol' not wanting to jump in someone else's bouncy house. I used to be a very active supporter of the "no kinks left behind" movement but lately I've kinda started to rethink that. I believe that sometimes it is actually overtly dishonest (and more than a little dumb) when you opt to switch from "Wait - you like to lick your own butthole? That's totally gross!" to "Uh oh, I don't want to threaten your already weakened sensibilities so instead I'll qualify that with 'unless its a fetish in which case I'm all for it' even though it's still totally gross."
YES, another option is not saying anything at all but if someone asks me if I like to lick my own butthole I'm probably not going to say "Sorry, no comment."
One is the truth, one is a lie, and one is conspicuously evasive.
Ok, I really don't give a fuck about anyone's opinion regarding my fetishes, or if anyone tells me they're gross. I'm ok with them, I own them, and I'm not ashamed. For now KS does exist, but hopefully someday no one will ever feel such a thing again.
And in the mean time none of us should ever forget that the Block button is right there begging to be pushed, and "go fuck yourself" is a mere few words away.