Scribbles

It is here, and about damn time too.

I am sitting at the airport waiting for some loud, faceless voice to announce that it is time to board the plane that will take me to be with my sub, love, baby, whore, lady, friend, and brightest light - ButterfliesAndCuffs. 

It is noisy and busy but I am not distracted because I can think of only one thing: her. Holding her, using her, laughing with her (and as we have both pointed out many times we do really laugh a lot together) and being together again after far too long.

Distance is a shitty prick, but in less than 12 hours we will have overcome it. We will probably not leave our hotel (or bed) much at all for the next few days and nights, but we will get to meet and spend time with our good friend Precor whom we both met here.
And while you are in the neighborhood don't forget to check out my girl's Thirst Trap Thursday post. She has included some incredibly sexy new pics - and just in case you were wondering, we chose them together and I approved every one!

That is going to have to be at for now because my flight will be boarding soon, but you will hear from both of us at some point to announce that we are together finally.

And about damn time too!

You may have noticed a few countdown posts here in the blogs during the past week or so. Apparently there are several of us who are going to be happily in the arms of our beloved partners very soon, including myself and my sorely missed sub ButterfliesAndCuffs.

It has been fairly well documented that I was sick the day they taught math class, and as something of a cute little joke my body decided would be funny to fuck with me and make me sick yesterday too. Fortunately it was only one of them 24-ish hour thingies and I am feeling all better, but since I was sleeping it off all day I was unable to do my countdown post. Like the very good girl she is, my dear sub did hers, and thankfully no one assumed that we had stopped counting!

Last night we were once again excitedly discussing our upcoming naughty time together, and of course we started to calculate the difference in time between our planes arriving at our destination. "I don't know" I told her, "you are on the math side of the slash in this dynamic." But then I saw it...

How did I miss this before? Right there on my phone, the app for the airlines I will by flying showed the date and time my first plane will be departing. But if you wait a couple seconds it also shows - a countdown!!! I never even had to try to figure it out because it was provided for me the whole time.

As of this very moment it says that I will be taking off in 1 day and 1 hour. I asked around and from what I am told that is approximately 25-ish hours. Add to that the actual time in the air, plus the 3-ish hours after I arrive until her plane touches down, and in 34-ish hours we will be standing together in the airport, her in my arms, kissing and stuff like that.

I think it is 34-ish. I'll have to check with my better math half.

Please check out my blog and hers tomorrow for our final countdown posts, including her Travel Time Thirst Trap Thursday spread. I have seen it and you are SOOO not going to want to miss it!

(What you are about to read is based on actual, repeated, real-life events. I am not poking fun at anything or anyone other than myself.)

As the days rapidly crawl toward the moment when I and my beautiful sub ButterfliesAndCuffs will be together again I have been reviewing my own personalized pre-flight checks, and have come to the comforting realization that - contrary to what I have been told - I do not have OCD, I merely have OCD tendencies. And there are very important differences.

For instance, like most people I pack exactly 5 times before leaving for a vacation, which I have been able to cut down from 7 by first making a list of everything I need to bring, triple checking it, and staging everything on my bed, clockwise in order of it's appearance on the list. This allows me to make sure that everything goes neatly into my suitcase in the proper sequence, top to bottom, left to right.
Which is a perfectly reasonable tendency.

Obviously all non-clothing items (toiletries, medications, chargers, cold remedies, sanitizer, important documents including my itinerary and the aforementioned itemized list, etc.) go into their own ziplock bags, along with lists of contents so nothing gets overlooked or left out during the 5 packings. Each ziplock bag also includes a copy of my itinerary, just in case any of others somehow get wet or forgotten or lost or damaged. Also, by writing the dates and destinations of my trip on the outside of the ziplock bags I can be certain that they are all brand new and unique to the vacation in question, though it is helpful to practice that a few times before loading all the items inside, just to make sure everything is legible.
You will agree that these are all understandable, sensible tendencies.

Since I always bring by laptop with me everywhere I go my carry-on bag is the perfect size for it (with room to spare for all the chargers, USB cables, my kindle, it's charger, medications, sanitizer, copies of important documents including my itinerary and the aforementioned itemized lists, etc.) And everything is folded up and wound up and packed up so that the whole thing will lie perfectly flat when placed on the floor with the side pocket facing up. It has to be in that position because the pocket holds my itinerary in triplicate and I must maintain quick, easy access just in case I need a copy for something or someone I hadn't anticipated.
I tend to be somewhat more cautious when I will be out of the house for more than a few hours.

I have already reviewed my plan exactly 37 times and have come to the conclusion that the only OCD-ish things about my preparations and pre-trip rituals are the 13 trial runs I do the night before, but everybody does that.

True story. And it will all be more than worth it when at long last she is on her knees before me again.

There is a reason why I don't math in my head - I'm no good at it. Add to that my already complicated relationship with numbers - I don't like some of them, and more than that, I just don't trust some of them. Now, I know what you're thinking:
"What the fuck dude - that is so crazy true! Numbers suck!"
Well, no, it's not that they suck, it's that they can't always be relied upon to add up the way we want them to. For example:

In 5-ish days I will arrive at the airport in (location withheld for sexy purposes) where a mere few hours later I will be meeting my dear ButterfliesAndCuffs at baggage claim after her plane lands (we talked about it and decided that that will be more convenient than trying to meet there before her plane touches down.)
We have done the math (ok, she did the math) and we have estimated that we will be together in approximately 125 hours.

But I want the numbers to add up to RIGHT NOW and dumb math wont let that happen.

Ok, I get it, there are rules. Rules can be fun. I like rules. Rules are our friends. I'm sure that thousands of years ago places like Babylonia and Mesopotamia were pretty happening places, and doubtless Pythagoras and Archimedes would have been cool guys to party with - but how did everyone involved in the math game overlook factors like flight times and longing and impatience?

So we have to wait another 5-ish days, and there is nothing I can do about it, in my head or otherwhere. Perhaps by the time we leave the airport I will have forgotten my completely rational frustration and resentment toward numbers, but for now I say fuck you math! Not cool!

Strawberries

I own this mouth and it swallows everything I tell it to.

(Admit it - you want to be me right now hahah!)

**Posted with full consent. It was actually her idea. How awesome is she! Original post here**

6 days left.

It is less than a week until I devour my tasty little ButterfliesAndCuffs. Yes, devour. As in eat, consume, demolish, gorge on, take ravenously, use to satisfy myself as I please. So in honor of the remaining 6 days, we both accepted Maxorde's awesome challenge. She posted her answer earlier today. Good thing this will be limited to only 6 things because I could go on and on and on about the brazillion things I love about her:

1. Her tremendous mind and will and heart. She already had it goin' on when we met, but she keeps getting better, stronger, faster. She has the technology. She has somehow become... more, and in every way. And not because of me! It is because she keeps trying and reaching for the next thing, no matter how far away it is. And she reaches it too, every time.

2. There is just no other person - I mean Nobody - that makes me laugh as much as she does. We make up games, we invent new words, and it is insane how much time we spend just falling over in tears because one of us said something that just killed both of us. More often than not it is something so silly, so dumb, that not many people would think it was funny. But we always do.

3. I have mentioned on a few occasions that at first I thought she was just too sweet for words, and she totally is. But turns out that she is NAUGHTY!!! Like crazy sexy naughty. Like super whorey naughty. Like necessary to take night classes just to comprehend how naughty. Like I need to take out a second mortgage just to afford additional space for all her naughty. Wow.

4. Ok, I left this one out of the first few spots and waited until I thought it had been enough time and was safe to whip it out, because it could cause some serious damage, mentally and physically. And because I didn't want everyone to think I am shallow. I mean, I am, but I don't want that to take away from the rest of the list. I'm talking about her glorious smile! Have you seen it? Her smile absolutely devastates me. No kidding, I could happily see it everyday for the rest of my life.
(Honorable mention: killer body!)

5. She loves me. How could I not include that on this list? And she proves it everyday without ever having to prove it. It is in everything she says and does, the way she looks at me, her willingness and eagerness to submit in every way. The way she makes me want to be a better Dom and a better man. The way she has touched me, physically and emotionally, that says "I love you" without even saying it.

6. She is my sub, the best I could ever ask for. But she is also my friend, my light, my lover, my love, my reason, and my just everything. All mine.

(And no kidding - go look at that smile!)

Or 1 week, whichever.

We haven't distilled it down to hours yet but surely that will be happening soon. Not long ago it was more than a month away so I can deal with 7 days because when that final hour arrives I will be in possession of my own - and my owned - ButterfliesAndCuffs.

Since she will be going out with friends tonight I will take the opportunity to catch up with some of my friends that I kinda haven't talked to in a while due to there being this little toy I enjoy playing with instead. And she is SO much fun to play with. And to do everything else with/to as well.

She added a new post on her blog today about something that we have discussed many times because of how remarkable and head-shakey it is: just how totally off-putting our profiles were to each other initially. So much so that we both thought there was no way either of us would ever be right for the other, or even interested in more than friendship.

But she is (among countless other things) so much more loyal and obedient and submissive than I assumed she could be, so much more of a masochist than she let on, as naughty and whorey as I could hope for, and with a much stronger heart, mind, and body than I imagined. I am continually amazed at just how complete and completely amazing she really is.

But, lest you think that I had completely misjudged her, know this: she is as sweet and kind and loving and tender and intelligent and fragile and delicate and beautiful as everyone thinks she is. Even more so, if that's possible. And she's fucking hilarious!

In fairness, at first she had me all wrong too! Funny thing about profiles, we are not exclusively our kinks and limits and pictures and descriptions and words on a screen; we are almost never exactly the people that our profiles suggest. So, at first we had each other wrong, but somehow that led to us now having each other. She may have been the first to say it today, but I wholly concur: being wrong can be pretty fucking awesome sometimes.

Today I have two very important points to make so listen carefully and don't get lost -
1. Doms fall in love too.
2. Time is a butthole.

You frequently hear and read about how a sub loves her Dom, how she is devoted and committed to her Sir, that her heart beats only for Him, and so on. Yet, from what I am told, it goes largely unmentioned how often a Dom falls for his sub. If true, perhaps part of the reason is that some Doms believe it removes some of control they have over their subs? That they can't dominate their own subs if they can't first dominate their own feelings? That their Dom colors are fading, or their Dom pants are beginning to rip apart at the seams?
Bullshit. They are in love with their subs and for some ridiculous reason they dont want the world to know. But it happens, and I suspect it happens a lot. I know that it does because it happened to me. I am in love with my sub, my good girl, the caretaker of my property, my dirty whore, my own ButterfliesAndCuffs. And I wont let it go unmentioned - because I do want the whole world to know. We both do.
And that doesn't weaken our dynamic, it strengthens it. It does not mean that I own less of her, but that I possess her now more than ever. My love does not distract her from my dominance, it makes her feel her submission more profoundly.
How fucking cool is that!

On to my second point...

8 days to go. 8 fucking days. 8 fuck off days. 8 go fuck yourself days.
8 Macarthur Park days. (7 extra points if you get that reference. Not 8 points, because today 8 sucks.)
8 "It's an honor just to be nominated" days. Except it's not an honor since I already won yet I have to wait another shitfuck 8 days to accept my award..
I keep reminding myself that it is just a matter of time, and that time is a butthole. Time can suck sweaty llama balls. Time is the unlaundered shit stain on the underpants of always. Time can't even afford a trial period parking pass in the friendzone of ass.
I pee in the face of time, but not in a hot, sexy way. Time doesn't get the good stuff, it gets the bottom of the bladder, left over coffee grounds pee.
Nope, all of the best of everything I am is reserved for - and because of - my one. The only one I want. The one I own. The one I love. My ButterfliesAndCuffs.

To summarize:
I am in love with my sub.
And 8 days can kiss my ass.

I have this little piece of property I own a few hours from here that I like to visit, travel through, spread some seeds, loving and appreciating and doing whatever I want with. I'll be spending some time on and in my property very soon.

In preparation for that trip (and because this sort of thing seems to be quite a lot of fun for a lot of people) I'm going to tell you about it while I check the calendar for the 3rd time already today -

Countdown to my Love.

As you may have already heard, on March 24 I will once again be holding and loving and laughing with my wonderful, glorious ButterfliesAndCuffs (yes, yes, butt stuff too. Geez, I thought I told you to mind your own business!) She is the most amazing woman I have ever met, the kindest heart I have ever felt, a treasured friend, my most prized possession, the best sub I could ever want, and the only toy I will ever want to own and play with ever again.
She is all of these and so much more; so many, many wonderful things. It has been too long since the last time I held her, too long since she looked up at me with eyes that say "take me or I will devastate you with my radiant smile!"

And we get to meet with our sneaky friend Precor whom some of you may remember from right here. We have a few things to thank her for in person.

9 days and counting. Ugh, maybe I should go check the calendar a 4th time.

People keep coming up to me on the street, in the stores, at the circus, even when I'm just getting out of the shower,

and everyone has the same question:

LJ - why are you so happy? Why are you smiling so much? What's with the extra spring in your step?

Why are you sooo hard sooo all the time?

I tell them:

Because I own this.

(And if somehow that doesn't answer their question I tell them to take a look at this!)

And because I am sooo proud and I want the whole world to know.