How will you earn that submission Mr. or Mrs. Dom?
The answer to the question rests in the method of the attempt. Consider mountain climbers for a moment. Do you think they are all the same? Do you believe they approach the task at hand with the same processes? I can tell you for a fact, they do not. For each climber there is a unique set of circumstances imho.... these are but a few
Some wish to climb the mountain to the top, leaving no or as little evidence that they were ever there, leaving it as unchanged as when they found it.
Some wish to reach the top regardless of what they leave in their wake. They simply want to reach the top at all costs.
Some wish to embrace the adventure. take it all in with every breath from step one, to gain a lifetime of memories
I can also tell you that making the attempt with others who do not share your desires can have disastrous results for one or both of you.
So now comes the moment of truth. As you have finally met that new sub or Dom you wish to explore with, what goals do you have in mind? Are your goals the same? Are YOU being totally honest and truthful with the object of your desires? AND JUST WHAT ARE THOSE DESIRES?
There are many pathways to the top of the mountain, but all require one main common theme ... honesty and integrity.
If all you are wanting is some playtime, some physical intimacy, some NSA interactions, be damn sure you are upfront about it. No lead ons, no hidden agendas. And if along the way your goal changes, be honest about that too. Yes, the "things have changed" talk is prolly going to hurt somebody, but it will hurt less the sooner you have it, or you may even get surprised and find you BOTH want to change it.
If you are wanting a dynamic, but not a committed serious type of thing, again .. honesty is key, and you both better want the same thing.
But if what you seek is what I have referred to in prior bloggings as "the true bdsm dynamic". Treat it with respect, treat THEM with respect. Get to know the person, not the body. Any woman can get a man in bed, and it doesn't take much of a man to fuck somebody, But if you want that deep life filling connection, you are gonna have to build it. Take in the ENTIRE experience, from day 1. Celebrate each new discovery and level of trust you discover together. The physical will come as it should, wanna make it Earth Shattering? Learn to touch each others souls, and when the trust is there to even allow that...... your time has come.
Just my 2 cents worth...
~ID~
