Yesterday was day 3 of my 30 day chastity. So far i have been compliant.
i was sent to work alone. Its Monday, orders have been shipped. Nothing much to do. i'm bored.
i tested my resolve. i watched porn, i read erotic stories, i chatted with kinky friends
Yes a true masochist! But i did not go to the forbidden garden!
i am strong and will stay true! i can do this!
Day 3: A HUGE SUCCESS!
This is day 2 of my punishment, 30 days of chastity for being a greedy cumslut.
My task yesterday was to be by Master's side so He could watch my every move.
It started interestingly with an intense play session. You might be a bit confused as this is suppose to be 30 days of chastity but you see Master owns this cunt, it is His and to make that quite clear He took possession!
Then I was spanked soundly and sent to the kitchen to make his breakfast. Yes a wonderful way to start the day.
Now my instructions were clear. Be at Masters beck and call. Its Sunday, a day off from work and we will be together the entire day so this will be an easy day.
Or will it.
i proved my worth as a dutiful slave and was His laborer, climbing down into the crawl space with Him and the big bugs! Handing Him tools, fetching materials, holding the light! Up and down, down and up, holy shit this is hard work!
By the end of the day after I cleaned up the dishes from dinner, Master was able rest and i couldn't wait to sit down and rest too. i realized that i did not have one naughty thought of His greedy cunt the entire day and now all i wanted was to cuddle!
No, Master doesnt have to explained to me again that play has been sparse not because He does not love His slut but because of all He has on His mind. i need to maintain control of His cunt and if i become overwhelmed i should tell Him. i usually can't keep my desires in check because i am insatiable and that is embarrassing. Now with adding the online dynamic, it has given something new to our lifestyle and yes there will always be sexual stimulation, He also understands i will always be a work in progress. But now i have renewed understanding of what Master is dealing with and will work harder to keep His cunt in check!
Day 2 A SUCCESS!
Day 3: Task IIII: Being On My Own
30 Days of Chastity because i am greedy!
Day 1:
Task I : Research the history of chastity
Thank goodness for YouTube!
Thats why I failed history as a child. My goodness that's alot to know.
Task II:
Chastity in todays BDSM Community
The purpose is to “bring sexual anticipation to an unbearable level by putting yourself in a chastity belt... Surrender total control by giving the key to your partner”. It is known as “orgasm denial play” and is designed to be used in consensual sexual relationship
Chastity belts in BDSM may be used as part of a practice of orgasm control, to prevent the wearer from engaging principally in sexual intercourse without the permission of the dominant, who acts as "keyholder". A chastity belt will also prevent other sexual activity such as masturbation and oral sex involving the wearer's genitals. Chastity belts may be worn by both men and women as part of BDSM play. A chastity belt may be worn for the duration of a sex play, for a limited period or as a long-term arrangement.
i am hopeful to impress my Sir with a willful ability to gain control of my naughty minx ways. But knowing my track history i will continue shopping for the jewelry that may be added to my wardrobe.
Day 1 WAS A SUCCESS!
Tomorrow:
Day 2: Task III: Supervision Of The Slut
i did something stupid because i am a sex addict and agreed to online play with a friend without permission from my Sir! Even though we are no longer poly by Masters request, there was a time that this would have not been such a serious offense because I would have asked. Yes I know how wrong this is, I know enough to know why this is wrong too!
There have been times since joining this site that Master has allowed certian types of interaction with other Dominants and submissives. Such as sharing experiences and kinks with pictures and controlled play. By that i mean that i have been allowed to have my masturbation controlled by a Dominant to give him experience with controlling a submissive. i have been allowed to experience what it would be like to be a switch, never in realtime you see, always online. i found i dont have a Dominant bone in my body, lol!
But then came an unexpected interaction that of course started innocently. Friends chatting about our kink, the other person was a male submissive, he was empathetic and very sexual like me but that was where the similarities ended. He was going through some things and I thought I could help. We had fun talking about how slutty we could be and then it happened!
He needed a dominants attention, i was excited to try and give him what he needed. I failed miserably, i am a true submissive and i told him so. The tone changed over night. He became dominant. My addiction kicked into high gear.
I decided to play, my play partner warned me of not being able to provide aftercare, but i said that i was a big girl and could handle my own aftercare. The play began.
I was told to do things I had never done before, mostly edging which was not something i had ever been made to do. There was nothing beyond my limits but i still hit subspace.
Then i was told to turn my attention to pleasing my Master.
What?!
i dropped! i dropped hard.
Master did not know what i had been up to, i tried to handle the feelings on my own. The play partner became unavailable. i was told that he could not be reach for awhile.
I couldn't handle it anymore and began to cry uncontrollably. Master gathered me into his arms as i sobbed. i spilled my guts. i told Master everything. How i was made to edge, how i was made to plug, how i was made to spank my greedy cunt!
His response was iconic! i am reminded why He has been my only Master!
He said,"knuckles you silly bitch, I didnt know you wanted you to edge. If I had known you wanted that experience you could have edged the driveway!"
Lessons learned, i am not strong enough to play without aftercare, i need to be stronger and just say No to online play!
And most of all i learned Master is the Master of this sex crazied addict!
Oh and i will be paying homage to Sirs cock for many days to come without release! Now that is edging at its finest!
I don't need you to save me
I don't need you to cure me
I don’t need you and your antidote for I am my disease
I don't need you to free me
I don't need you to help me
I don't need you to lead me through the light
I will always fall and rise again
Your venomous heroine
'Cause I am a survivor
Yeah, I am a fighter
I will fall and rise above
And in your hate I find love
'Cause I'm a survivor
Yeah, I am a fighter
I will not hide my face
I will not fall from grace
I'll walk into the fire, baby
All my life
I was afraid to die
And now I come alive inside these flames
You don't want me to love you
You don't want me to need you
You don't want to look at me for you will turn to stone
You don't want me to hurt you
You don't want me to bite you
You don't want me or my aching soul
For I will only fall and rise again
Your venomous heroine
I’m a survivor
Yeah, I am a fighter
I will fall and rise above
And in your hate I find love
‘Cause I'm a survivor
Yeah, I am a fighter
I will not hide my face
I will not fall from grace
I'll walk into the fire, baby.
All my life
I was afraid to die
But now I come alive inside these flames!
I don’t need you to save me
‘Cause I’m a survivor
Yeah, I am a fighter
I will not hide my face,
I will not fall from grace,
I’ll walk into the fire, baby
All my life
I was afraid to die
But now I come alive inside these
Alive inside these
Alive inside these
pho·bi·a
ˈfōbēə/
noun
an extreme or irrational fear of or aversion to something.
"he had a phobia about being under water"
Master takes me there,
That place i fear.
Where he keeps me waiting
It brings a tear.
i wait, i wait, i wait
In that place i hate
Some days I can't say why I'm feeling lonely
And some days I am too proud to ask for help
And I stumble through the noise trying to find some peace
A stranger in the crowd, I lose myself
So I walk down to the river
Where the troubles, they can't find me
Let the waters there remind me
The sun will be there when we wake
I walk down to the river
Though I might not understand it
It's not always as we planned it
But we grow stronger when we break
So I walk down to the river
I walk down to the river
This raging world can get so overwhelming
Looking for a meaning when it won't make sense
In my head it's getting loud like I can't outrun this cloud
No matter where I go well there I am
So I walk down to the river
Where the troubles, they can't find me
Let the waters there remind me
The sun will be there when we wake
I walk down to the river
Though I might not understand it
It's not always as we planned it
But we grow stronger when we break
So I walk down to the river
I walk down to the river
Let the calm pull me under
Far beyond the thunder
And tell me it will all be okay
Let the waves take all my worries
Conquer them with fury
Give me shelter, be my escape
I walk down to the river
Where the troubles, they can't find me
Let the waters there remind me
The sun will be there when we wake
I walk down to the river
Though I might not understand it
It's not always as we planned it
But we grow stronger when we break
So I walk down to the river
I walk down to the river
I walk down to the river
I walk down to the river, to the river
To the river
I walk down, oh oh oh oh
To the river, oh oh
Oh oh oh oh
Actually I would love to be Debra but I would probably get fired for stealing! Lol!
i hate to brag,
i hate to boast!
But being a woman is so great i must post!
Why you might ask for these gleeful lines!
Because we can orgasm multiple times!
My heart is an entity of its own,
It walks beside me all alone.
We hear the music on a string
My heart and I begin to sing
Its only hanging by a thread
As we listen in our lovely bed
The music will bring us together to spoon
But then it's only a paper moon.