In person in Boston, I found my place in the kinky groups. Being a dues paying member of New England Dungeon Society (money to pay for presenters insurance and the website.)
On the large fet community board that replaced hundreds of individual websites and message boards, a fairly rough and tumble community these days, I have found my place years ago- and then again last year.
I generally get along with people just fine.
I'm fed up with my local, small city, kinky group (not the city listed on my profile,that was mistake when signing up.) Recently, I was not able to present my intended educational event and had to "wing it' because the member hosting the event told my co-presenter to leave. It was an unofficial event advertised on the local group page, so the homeowner has the right to say who is on their property.
I had agreed to present, so I stayed. In retrospect, I should have left, but I did my best for the people who came to the event.
Thinking of the local group board members, I consider one of them an unsafe player, one is not in the lifestyle beyond being a spouse, and two of them recently described themselves as assholes.
I'm not going back to that house or doing any presentations at unofficial local events. My place is not with people who put personal politics above group principles of safety and inclusivity.
- - -
I have tried to stay within the codes of conduct for this website in this post.
I'm not trying to out anyone or tell anyone else they don't belong in either of the local groups.
I am venting.
I'm finding it painful, that even though I consider myself at a sophmore level in the kink of the evening, and was asked (tricked) into joining a practice group where I would be the defacto presenter - even though it started out wrong, I prepared educational and entertaining content withing the level where I am comfortable explaining the risks and rewards - and even though my chosen assistant worked on the safety and practicality of the evenings presentation, worked so hard as to reach the level of being a co-presenter, they were denied access to a group advertised event.
.This isn't high school. I will not play with immature kinksters. I'd rather have a dozen sincere newbies at an event than whoever these people are
p
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