The Isolation Diaries

What follows is a bit of a moan, yes I am a little bitch at times, so strap yourself in for a bumpy ride…or strap on if you like, there would be no complaints here.  (Shite joke I know, but it’s been a long couple of weeks )

After contracting the zombie virus over Christmas my immune system has been fucked, catching everything going.  While I haven’t gone full infected, human brains just didn’t appeal to my delicate sensibilities.  one of the worst aspects of the aftermath is that I have a zombie toe.

but Mr Monkey what the fuck is a zombie toe?  I would post a pic but I’d expect to be cash apped if I did.  Basically my big toe has swollen to the point I haven’t been able to put my shoes on.  It is also fucking agony to walk on so I’ve not left house in about 2 weeks.

It’s making me a bit moody, there are after all only so many shite 80’s horror films one can watch.

been given anti biotic as and it is clearing a bit but by fuck does it hurt. Considering giving it the old double tap.  If it’s still there at the end of the week I’m gonna take some garden shears to it.  

anyways.

moany post over.  Next time might be more introspective or whimsical…who knows, depends on how good the pain killers are.

or maybe it’s the guilt that add to the pleasure.

Though to be fair rocking out to S-club 7 s reach or trudging through the countless “real life” para normal investigation programmes may be fun, it rarely comes close to that mixed feeling of vulnerability and comfort you give control over to someone.

I always find it interesting finding out why people are…people.  Well what makes them people…who they are.  

I find quite often though, particularly on kink related sites, that you don’t always get the authentic person.  

blank profiles or the odd chart where the percentages don’t add up to 100% dominate (pun intended) a huge number of accounts.  No chance of getting a read on people.

So, with that in mind let’s have an amnesty of sorts.  Tell us some (non kink related) guilty pleasures.  Bonus points* if you currently have a blank profile or one those chart things.  Double bonus points if you have seen a ghost**.

*No prizes, but it’s always handy to have some internet points in the back pocket.

**or experienced anything you can’t explain***

***Non kink related, cos let’s be honest some folks can be into some pretty unexplainable things****

****Infact let’s just keep it to ghosts, I can see someone saying they caught thier da pissing in the sink when the toilet was right there.  I mean sure it’s hard to understand, but your old man was clearly pished and mistook the sink for a urinal. 

Going on 3 weeks of sounding like some sort of breathy raspy bordello worker.  If feel I really need to capitalise on this.

I reckon there must be a market for bunged up Ayrshire Droll for folks to listen to while they rip the head off it or slap the bean.

What do you mean no?

I’ll take it to dragons den and see what big Pete and his pals think about it.

Anyhoo,

back to the work face.

I am one month away from being half way to 80.

The thought for getting old has never really bothered me as…and this is a real thing…my mental brain had me convinced that I was going to die on Boxing Day this year.  I had everything all set up too, tunes for my funeral (paper roses by Marie Osmond for when I’m carried in and we got the moves by electric call boy for when I go up in smoke and everyone is leaving)

Had letters and everything written for my kids too.

I honestly have no clue why I thought that may happen..other than my head likes to fuck with me almost as much as I like to fuck with it.

anyways, imagine my surprise when I never dropped dead.  

realisation that I have a good few years left and not exactly sure what to do with it.  Still it’s exciting.

so here’s the plan,  I am too good for the job I am doing just know,  this year I’m gonna either get a new job elsewhere or at my current place of work.

im going to do more writing, not for any reason, just I enjoy telling wee stories.  I may or may not self publish depending on how brave I feel about them.

I’m going to try and make more meaningful connections.  I don’t have many pals where I stay and I really do miss having folks I can just talk baws with.  Does that sound like I’m a bit of a saddo?  Maybe,

kink wise?  I’d like to explore my submissive side a bit more, but really just happy talking to like minded folks.

Anyways, here’s to not being dead.

catch ye

…man I fucking hate that turn of phrase.  Mostly cos it’s just a thing said and rarely done. 

So here’s the plan for the year.  I’m going to try and be more better and grammer be dammed.

im going to be open to all new things, push my comfort levels.

actually talk about things without wanting to murder someone or toss myself into a wall.

I have goals I’d like to achieve, i might compile a list of them here or I might just patch it and pretend I’ve achieved them.  

anyhoo.

onwards and upwards 

2, nearly 3 years without incident.  Went to the football just before Christmas Eve and noticed my pie was a little rubbery with no taste.

queue a night of high fever and no sleep…tested in the morning and there was more than one c-word being used.

First time I’ve had the full festive period off, ever and I was stuck in the house.

I know others have suffered a lot more than me so won’t moan too much, but it is fucking shite. 

all better now, still no voice though and still in the hufff.

Aunty Rona is a prick, pass it on

Got the boke…my wee girl had it a couple weeks ago, psssed it to my wife who as then decided to pass it to me.

Nothing quite like the feeling that every fart is a threat and not want to to eat anything just in case the food comes back up to say hello.

Too much?  Aye probably is…

anyways taking a day off work to try and sleep it off and feel sorry for myself, probably take tomorrow off too.  I’m a big believer in the rule of 2.  

Basically if you take a day off take two days so that it clears…and if you feel better the next day you get a wee day to yourself.

anyhoo, quarter finals of the World Cup starting today.  Croatia vs Brazil kicking things off I do think it’s going to be France or Brazil winning the full thing.  This World Cup has had some wild results though so could be a dark horse like Croatia or even Morocco. Honestly don’t mind who…so long as it’s not England. 

anyways, I’m off to try fight my guts again

Hello Cagebots,

It’s been a while, but after experiencing what can best be described as a fraternally inspired episode of poor mental health I had to step away from most my social medias and spend a bit of time “touching grass” as kids say these days.

Over the past year or so I have made the decision to cut the people that were causing the issues as best I can.  Figuratively of coarse, I’ve not got the stomach to operate literally, however tempting it may have been.

Anyhoo, I know I left quite abruptly and if anyone I was  talking to remembers me, I am sorry.  I would reach out but I think after nearly two years it’s probably not the done thing, 

I’ve had fun reading back over some of my old posts today, planning to add a bit more going forward.  Talking shite on here is always quite cathartic.

anyways,

til next time cagerinos

toodeloo

Caught myself last night watching Radiohead at glasto from 1997 and thinking the first time I seen this I was a more spotty and socially awkward than I am now.  

I got thinking what would I tell 15 year old me, in truth it’s a hard question as there really isn’t much I’d change about my life, I’ve been lucky.  I think I would just offer an answer “3 more years, it won’t be great and a tent will fall on you”

Anyhoo, daddy day care today so I best get back to being a responsible adult

How do cagebots,

Some thoughts for today, not much structure today.

In Emerdale,*which is a soap based around farmers in the Yorkshire dales, why are their boots never dirty?

the existence of a sub-woofer implies the existence of a Dom woofer.

When you lose something, why is it always in the last place you look.

* I don’t actually watch this but it popped up when I was looking for some propper telly**

** you know like football or the A-team***or something equally as good

***ok so I know it’s not 1986 anymore, but still the  A-team was pretty good****

****well looking back...it has not aged well, and how come with all that gunfire nobody gets shot.  The are supposed to an elite commando unit, unless that just means they don’t wear any underwear.

that is all for today,  I’m going to go back to falling out with my internet connection and getting raging at customers.

toodloo