Good Morning Everyone!
I would like to begin today's blog with a little information on myself, a few thoughts that have been rolling through my head and perhaps a few questions for you to consider.
Now I enjoy golfing, I am absolutely average and it is something that I would like to improve at one day. Yesterday I went for my first time in years (I haven't had much free equity to spend on such folly) but the house that I choose to move to was partly based on its proximity to this golf course. One of my favourites, cheap and now close by!!!
Golf takes a lot of practice, patience and discipline as golf is a game of the tiniest degrees. Don't believe me? Think about the swing of a club, and imagine your club face is off by a millimeter. (Sorry I'm Canadian deal with my metrics) Does that millimeter make any difference? When your goal is a hole just 5 centimeters wide, when you apply force through your swing and that slight twist of the club face adds spin to the ball..... Trust me, I went through my fair share of shanks yesterday and the tiniest shift in the club face can have you running through shrubs going "Where did that fucker go!?!??"
The thing that I really enjoy about golfing is the peace on the course. Now I don't mean to say that golfing is peaceful. I've had my share of breakdowns, clubs thrown and curses shouted. I've been beside friends who have "lost their shit", maybe they had a few too many beers but that's besides the point. What I mean is I enjoy golf the most when there aren't many people around and there is no pressure to play quickly. You can listen to the birds and animals, the sounds of the wind, and it's calming. You get time with yourself and can enjoy walking the course, and boy was I fortunate. I had called to make a tee time but found out they were wide open so when I showed up to play my round until the 16th hole the only other people on the course were the workers going about mowing the fairways, and taking care of what was needed. That and the birds and other animals. The thing about it was, I was completely alone and no one was around. I could celebrate my shots and pars made, I could express myself fully without reservation. I actually managed to make 2 pars on the day, and for my first time out in a while it makes me extremely excited for the rest of my season. The 18th hole I missed a birdie opportunity by an inch, and I couldn't believe how close I was!!! I had some really good shots, some really great shots and some absolute stinkers. But that's golf and I am not consistent enough to drop my score under 110. Well I shot 118 but that's an honest 118. I believe if you cheat yourself on the scorecard it only effects you, you can puff up your chest and boast "I'm such a great golfer!" But if you forget to count the dropped balls (Oh yeah, I lost 10+ balls yesterday!) then you aren't accurately portraying *your* golf game. So I'm brutally honest when tracking my score because I want to legitimately improve and that can only be done when we take honest stock of who and what we are.
Now onto the thoughts that I had. While I was out there I had to make sure I didn't get too close to any of the geese as they can be aggressive depending on the day, luckily the only things they were interested in fighting was themselves. But I saw and heard robins and all sorts of different animals and sounds. It wasn't until I had made it home and was chatting with some individuals here on the Cage that I began to think back to the animals and the sounds they could produce. As humans we are extremely fortunate that we can express ourselves in any number of ways. We have the ability to change our voices, to create sounds that draw us in and sounds that push us away. You should hear my "old man voice".... Animals only have so much range of expression when it comes to how they communicate but each individual here has so much potential. We can argue, yell, kick and scream. We can moan and whisper sensual little secrets. We can bite and squeal, laugh and cry. We can EMOTE!! Why does that matter and what am I going on about? Each one of us, has a natural state. It is our state of being where we are comfortable. Some people love being on a stage, surrounded by adoring fans. Some people like quiet and calm safe spaces. We each have intrinsic desires that match our personalities, our wants, our emotions, and how we process and view the world. Everyone of us, likes to be one thing or another. That is dependant on our past experiences and what may have occured, and how we overcame it. Or maybe the fact that we didn't and are still working through it. It doesn't really matter though, it's about looking inside of yourself and realizing your natural state. I did a little digging into myself last night trying to come to terms with who I am. We all have somewhere we want to end up, a goal for ourself. Mentally, physically, emotionally. It doesn't matter which one it is because truth be told we should be setting emotional goals for ourselves. For me, it's controlling the anger that can swell up and appear out of nowhere. It's about being aware of my situation and alert to the triggers I know I have. Making sure that in my awareness I am cognizant of what might spike an outburst and doing everything to mitigate that. My physical goals are easy, right now I'm trying to achieve a free standing hand stand push up and I'm making progress. Mentally I want to know myself intimately. I need to continue to understand this person that has flaws, and has made mistakes. But can bring joy and silliness and laughter. We all have so much potential, every single one of us. We just need to attune to our natural state to help achieve our potential. That takes reflection. It takes introspection. These aren't easy. They take time and patience. You must begin the path to understanding and accepting yourself. We all want to live our best lives, but how can we possibly do that if we are lying to ourselves about what we want??? Be honest about your desires because they are how you define yourself. We are all of our emotions, all of our physical self, all of the mistakes we have made. We are our desires. Until we accept and can express who we are, we must keep struggling to find out.
So I want those that end up reading this to take some time today. Think about yourself and your natural state. Where are you happiest? What brings the most joy to *you*? What desires do you want to see fulfilled? Take some time to sit with yourself, no distractions. Just sit in a chair, on the floor. Kneel if you like, find some space that you feel comfortable and natural being in. Take a moment and look at your actions, your choices in life. Some may be challenging, maybe you are dealing with some bovine fecal matter at work, or perhaps in a personal relationship in your life. Maybe you are just struggling with your body image, or some action that ended poorly. Maybe you are celebrating a success! Take some time and look at who you are, what you want and take one small step to achieving one goal in your life. Whether thats emotionally, physically or mentally. We need to be balanced in our lives, and it takes equal work in all aspects of who we are to achieve that. I am making progress towards my natural state, and I will continue on my path. No one else may walk it for me, and realizing that we are in control of our potential is a truly freeing thought. So take control of your potential today and do something good for you!!
I hope everyone is well, and that we all find that peace we are looking for. Have a great day everyone!!
