Hello Cage friends,
How goes the going? I must say life is busy and interesting. Work has been a bit hectic but such is the case when the world freezes and then warms up. At least when you deal with water.
As for my personal life, things have taken a turn for the better. Just recently I managed to overcome the halfway point for the massive amount of debt that had been piling over my head. There is still a very long way to go, but significant progress has been made which is truly wonderful and amazing.
I have wonderful people in my life that help challenge and inspire growth within myself. I have also been making a few new friends and getting to know acquaintances better.
Not only that, but a decision has been made!!!! Faith and I have now figured out that yes in fact we know where we plan to visit together on my very first trip abroad. Once the world stops exploding, and I have a greater handle on my finances we have determined that we are both going to fly to Japan on our first trip together. This may or may not be our first time meeting in person, depending on what happens with Covid, finances, time off, and so many other factors that will eventually impact this decision. A fair few of those factors won't be determined until months down the road.
Butt!!!!
Now that we have a destination we also have intentional work to do. Currently, we are both attempting to learn some aspects of the Japanese language such that we will be able to maybe have a conversation, understand signs, and have an idea of what's on the menu when we show up. We have been doing a fair amount of research, checking places, looking at sites to visit, things to do, areas we want to explore. Watching videos, signing up for online suggested packing lists and all manner of things.
Honestly, one of the things I'm most grateful to Faith is her ability to inspire my joy for learning again. Whether it be through friendly competition (seeing who can top the other one in 😜 in our Duolingo app) or challenges perspectives and ideas that force new thought patterns. But learning a new language is a challenge, but very exciting. I hadn't been excited to learn new things and she constantly inspires me to grow and move forward. Whether in D/s matters, or personal goals, or mentality, or this way or that way. I mean we both inspire each other to try our best to accomplish as much as we can. It's just been so very reinvigorating to have someone beside me who has lit a fire inside of me. She truly helps me burn brighter.
You know, lots of people speak about the thrill of the chase. About searching and playing the game of seeing how you match up, and whether or not you can convince someone to trust you to let you in. While that's all fine and dandy, the thing that REALLY makes me smile is that moment when you understand someone and then all of a sudden because of your influence, questions, thought process, or just general conversation there is a lightbulb flash of "Holy crap, I did not realize this *thing* before".
My Delilah had one such moment mere minutes ago. Her few sentences of realization inspired this whole idea of needing to write and express something of importance to me.
While we were talking, I discussed the idea of now that we are learning a new language we will get the chance to spend X amount of minutes trying to communicate in new language. Months down the road mind you, once we have a much better grasp of the dialect and how to actually hold a conversation. But, it will be a new way for us to spend part of our time. I mean we have a million ways we love to interact, whether it's reading one of the books we are currently working our way through, or watching a show or movie together. Whether we are working out, or even just taking a nap on the couch at the same time. Playing a board game, or just interacting in all the ways that matter to us. We will have a new way for us to begin to spend part of our time, and as I was describing this idea to her the light bulb moment of panic set in.
She recognized from her history an aspect of an area she needs to work on. She was teased and made fun of for her pronunciation and the thought of communicating in a new language that isn't well understood kind of terrifies her. But this realization made my heart smile, because it is an area that we will be able to navigate together. It's a space that **I** get to hold for her. It honestly kind of made me giddy thinking about being able to do my utmost to assist her in moving through this triggered area. It's a new discovery of something she didn't even realize was a problem. Until I started discussing how in the future we will have the chance to communicate in this new language. But I am honoured that I get to help her, I am even more excited for when we get to talk because it will become as area that we get to grow. That our dynamic can be further cemented and solidified. It's a place where opportunity exists, and if handled correctly it will build trust. It will ensure personal growth. It will ensure collective growth. It will be something that strengthens us further and brings us closer together.
I am excited for new discoveries. I am excited for learning new things. I am excited for my life and the potential that is shifting and evolving in front of me. I am excited that I am able to help identify these areas that may be struggles, and I am excited that I will be able to do my best to help navigate them.
Part of who I am needs to help and heal. Part of who I am requires being able to identify these triggered spaces, and finding a new one to work through is like opening a gift on Christmas. There is so much potential, every moment is filled with the chance to build trust, and further growth. If handled with the right intention, with the right attitude. With the right action.
I am confident that I am capable of managing this space with her. I am confident she will allow me the opportunity to improve her space, her existence and work through some of the struggles and challenges she has. I am deeply excited for the places we are going, metaphorically and literally. There is an abundance of what we can be capable of, and it takes the right person to help you discover that. I am grateful I have found one such individual that helps me fulfill my purpose, and has chosen me.
I hope you are all well, and thank you for taking the time to read my words today. Have a wonderful evening.
