It's been rainy off and on all day. Chilly and just kind of blah. It fits my mood. I've been up and down all day.
I had a great Mother's Day. Messages from almost everyone I wanted to hear from; a surprise lunch with my sister from another mister and the littles. Then a few rounds of Sequence and Scrabble with my youngest. He even picked out a couple of my favorite chick flicks and watched with me until I fell asleep. My sweet man-child; he loves his mama.
It's those down times, when I'm not keeping busy, that I get this pit in my stomach and come close to tears. I said I wasn't going to talk about it. I don't want to talk about it. Yet it keeps bubbling to the surface. 35 hours and 15 minutes ago...my mind is keeping time. How long before this becomes unhealthy?
5 stages of grief at the end of a relationship: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance
I don't deny he made a mistake (she said facetiously), but as much as I want him back, I'm not holding my breathe or dreaming about it.
I have plenty of anger (thus the desire to go to the batting cages at this moment).
I'm not the bargaining kind; I wouldn't do anything I wasn't open to doing when we were...whatever we were.
Depression- yep, we've become close friends, and if I hadn't had company today, I might have even stayed in my pjs all day.
Acceptance. I'll know I'm there when I stop looking at my phone to see if he text to check up on me.
35 hours and 40 minutes...