You know that feeling when you see something that just makes your stomach drop? When you are excited about something and then see that it isn't going to happen? I hate that feeling.
I was starting to really look forward to talking to him. I was hoping to start off on a new path with him. My first "true" experience that I've been looking for since joining this community. I went to message him good morning only to find...his account no longer exists.
That shit kinda hurt. I don't know if something happened, if it was an accident, or if it was intentional but...I miss him. I liked how inviting he was and how he would answer all my questions. How he would give me advice or tips. Most of all, I liked how he would ask about me too. It wasn't just about what BDSM was to us or what we enjoyed when it came to kinks. True, it is nice to discuss those things but I am looking for more than just playtime. I am looking for a potential partner that I can spend the rest of my life with. With everything being so new, I don't want to be jumping from one to the next.
I get emotionally attached very quickly and when I do, it gets intense. Waking up one morning to find they are suddenly gone...I've been there before way too many times in my life.
It hurts every time.
