So I got asked tonight "Why i play video games like a child" My answer was because if you had said that to me 20 years ago instead of talking to you and explaining like I`m going to i would have punched you in the mouth :D
Games are my escape, My way of chilling out. If i am angry i will play a game like Doom or Street Fighter. Something to get the adrenaline pumping but to also calm me down get the anger out of me. If im stressed i will play a Role Playing game like Mass Effect or Skyrim or the one im Playing now Fire Emblem(Which is why the conversation got started in the first place). I lose myself in the story, It helps me relax.
He didn`t say anything after that for a while and then said "I play Golf to do all that" So you play a game, It`s just a different kind of game to which he agreed with me, Of course i was still annoyed and wanted to shove said Golf Clubs up his ass but thanks to gaming i didn`t :D
At the end of the day I think we all have our hobbies that help us relax and nobody should be told it`s wrong no matter what it is, Aslong as It`s legal of course lol
Well been a couple of weeks since my last update, Said i was going to do it sparingly or when something decent happened so yeah little update again for myself more than anything :)
Girl i have been dating is now officially my G/F damn been a long time since i have been able to say that lol Spent our second weekend together this past weekend, Kinda made it official i didn`t wanna rush into anything so i hadn`t asked and then she said she would like to make it official, So yeah thats defo working out well. Doing the whole meet the parents thing on Friday, Not done that in a very long time 😄 Her dad`s a bit of a computer nerd like me though apparently so she thinks we will get on well, fingers crossed n all that lol
We talked about my kinky side as it were and she was fine with it all said not something she had ever tried or been into but as mine doesn`t really involve any form of pain she might be willing to give it a go, So thats good and took quite a bit of pressure from my brain probably the reason i didn`t wanna rush into anything subconsciously. But yeah we good :)
Health wise lost half a stone since i started to eat a little healthier even if i did eat a full can of squirty cream this weekend 😄 Sometimes dessert can be really really good for ya lol
So yeah life is good right now, I have zero complaints and coming from me thats a miracle in itself cos i can usually find something to moan about lol
Fave song of the moment even if all i have seen the past 2 weeks is the rain lol
Well my first date went really well 😄 We got on great had a laugh and already had our second date 😄 3rd one already set for next week.So yeah very happy right now :)
Never would have believed It, the turn around in a month is unbelievable. So this might be my last blog post for a while they are really only for myself anyways but unless something happens that i need to talk about/write down then i think im good :)
Big thanks to anyone thats read or left comments its always appreciated, I will still be around so if anyone ever wants to talk about anything just drop me a message.
So yeah life is good right now and forever may it continue :)
So i have a date tomorrow, Been talking to someone for a few days online(12 hours straight yesterday lol), She doesn`t know about my kinky side we haven`t spoken about sex at all, I don`t really have those conversations online its more of a face to face conversation to me, Might have been different if i had met her on here but a straight forward dating site pretty much a no-no lol
But she seems really nice we have a few things in common which is always good, a little bit younger than me but thats not an issue. Smart and funny and a wrestling fan so always a bonus 😄 Punching above my weight to be fair but then thats always the case i may be some things but pretty aint one of em lol
My new outlook on life is definitely paying dividends and my diet started yesterday too actually had my first salad in about 30 years lol So all in all things are going really well for me at the moment. Touch wood, fingers crossed all that jazz :D
Being positive has always given me this extra confidence boost and i have zero need or want to go back to how i was, felt crap looked like crap and ate crap so life was crap, Don`t spiral like i did if you start to feel or do feel like that talk to someone even if that person is yourself online all it takes is that little kickstart and im sure anyone can do it, Trust me i know how hard it is i was like it for a long time i was a mess but im through it now and im pretty sure its permanant 😄 Yes i have my wobbly moments but i just push past, Stop and close your eyes and just breath :)
So yeah looking forward to tomorrow its been a while and my last date was a disaster as previously mentioned in my Blog, So yeah fingers crossed and wish me luck :D
So back at work after my nice little long weekend, Flew by so quickly GGrrrrrrrrrrrr 😄 And I`m doing the exact same thing i have done for the past few days only i have my laptop with me lol Sat up all night played on my switch, watched some TV no comfy bed though lol
So anyways still feeling good and positive 😄 Longest I have felt this good In a long time, Other than the awful noodles i just ate making me feel Ugh of course. Eating all the bad for me crappy foods i have in the house right now cos once they are gone no more crappy foods i should not be eating. And as when i quit smoking If i have none to hand i wont be able to have one and the same will apply for the food too 😄 So fingers crossed i last more than a week :D
So yeah still super positive not much else to say really just a quick update for myself, I wanna read these back in a years time and still be feeling the same way or better :)
So since my reawakening as it were, Today has been the hardest one so far, I almost curled back into my ball and said Fuck It. But thankfully positivity won through :)
Another shopping day with my mother and I swear If I had a gun close to hand I may have ended It, So frustrating. I should point out my mother is in her mid to late 60`s and won`t leave the house on her own, Hence why I take her shopping twice a week, I have never had a problem with this, and as i work night`s It`s easier for me to do things during the day. But from the second I saw her it was NAG NAG NAG NAG lol.
Constant all the way around the Supermarket and I hate shopping in those places as It Is, Full of inconsiderate and selfish people, just walking down the aisles and they will be stood their side by side chatting and you say "excuse me please" and they look at ya like Shit of course after the 3rd or 4th time i don`t speak i just growl basically and give em the either ya move or I`m gonna move ya look lol I wouldn`t but damn i am close sometimes 😄 I think all shopping Karts/Trollys should have horns on em or at least
this song lol (The opening at least never heard the rest of it lol)
But yes today my mother really seriously pushed all my buttons at one point i shouted at her that if she didn`t shut up moaning and whining i was just gonna leave her and frack off home, Luckily she did she can tell when im seriously pissed but damn It was hard, Its also the reason i dont really open up to family cos they are all the same, It`s all me me me me Ggrrrrr. So i dont talk about my own problems hence why i bottled it up for so long.
Now I`m getting out there I`m talking again either via this blog or with friends, Trip to the pub last night and me and my friends just talked for hours about life in general was really good to just open up 😄 I even talked about my kinky side as it were lol First time ever but i explained what im wanting out of life and how i want to embrace all sides of my life. And i wasn`t drunk im still in shock lol.
Actually drinking now 2 days In a row don`t think thats happened more than a handful of times in 10 years lol Only because i got my hands on a bottle of Pedro Ximenez Sherry It`s fracking devine :D
So ye i stayed positive and overcame my first really big hurdle, For me anyways and I`m happy 😄 Watched a few of my Favourite Youtuber`s Videos kept me sane and brought a smile to my face 😄 Little bit of Gaming and im good again thats how i dealt with my stress growing up and I`m using it again now would never truly hurt anyone in real life but on a game on a TV screen ya ass is mine lol
So yesterday i talked about my Daddy Date that i was asked to go on, Had a few messages with differing views but was brought to my attention that just because i don`t and she doesn`t see it as cheating becuase their is no sexual side to the play, Her Husband might not see it that way.
So i contacted her today and told her that unless her husband knew what we were doing then It would have to be a Big Fat NOOOO :D
To be fair even if she wasn`t married it was still all a bit wierd lol
Still on a better note still feeling positive going to a pub with a couple of my friends tomorrow. First time I have done that in well over 2 years, so will be nice to get out and about again. Never been into the whole pub and club scene though to be fair i don`t really drink alcohol so its never been an important aspect of my life, of course never gonna find anyone sat on my ass at home on my own now am I lol.
So for anyone who is not a regular reader of the Rambling Randoms News( Or In other words my blog 😄 )Even if your not a regular im still gonna say the same thing lol
As you may or may not know i am currently have a resurgence in my life, Fighting fit and very very single and ready to mingle, Healthy mind not so healthy body but im working on it :D
Even though shopping day with my mother today, I swear that woman when she is out shopping would make the pope question his life choices and be in full on blasphemous mode lol If i wasn`t already grey, I would have been after today lol
Anyways back to where i was going before my mini tangent lol
So anyways back on Facebook, Heck even set up an instagram page for well just me and my solitary picture lol But wanted to follow a few people like a not so crazy stalker but still lol (Had a real stalker a few years back i assure ya not fun lol)
So anyways got messaged from one of my Ex partners today totally out of the blue she had heard that I was back in the land of the living and starting to get out in the world as it were, for me thats the local village about 1 mile away from my house(Where the shops are that I took me mother to lol), So not really the world as such lol She heard it from my sister they are friends lol So the contact not totally as random as it may seem lol
So we chatted for a while she is married now,I didn`t even know thats how in touch i have been recently lol and out of the blue she asked me if i would take her on a Daddy Date, When we were dating we used to go out for the day, And she would act like a brat and throw tantrums in shops and i would scold her, And she would just act like a kid for the day this is all in public by the way. Nothing sexual at all(My sister doesn`t know this side of our relationship by the way lol) She says she misses it her Husband is totally Vanilla.
Damn when i read that back to myself im like WTF am i thinking, When we dated we could pull it off but I think Im too old for it now lol Be like some fracked up version of the Krankies lol
for those who don`t know who the Krankies are by the way thats his wife and she is about 50 lol
So after 2 years i have finally had a shave 😄 Before and after pics are on my profile and still not sure which is scarier lol
Never had my picture on any kind of social media site, Dating sites once or twice yes but never a site like this or facebook heck even Myspace back in the day lol
Had a good trip to the Doctor`s today very positive, especially to say It`s been Xmas and the New Year I did overdo it with the sugar lol Still a Stobne down in weight since my last visit, and my bloods etc were looking good so im pleased with myself.
It`s just nice to put things down onto paper/screen lol So i may do these kind of updates on a daily basis or at least every few days. The more i talk about things the less i think about them in a negative way. I dont expect people to read them, Never have with any of my post`s really but its nice when people do and hopefully if they see themselves in the thing`s im saying then maybe it can inspire them to do the same 😄 Getting things off your chest and out into the world while it can be scary is never a bad thing :)
I know its not exactly BDSM relates as such but its all about the community and apart from one or 2 people that i have seen in here, You guys are always nice and friendly and always willing to give advice or encourage and that`s what a good community should be like in my opinion.
So yes as the title state`s I`m still in a positive mood, Actually going to the doctor`s for the first time in months this morning straight after work, I`m almost as shocked as my family was, I hate going and never make appointment`s unless i really really have, Usually in serious pain or half dead is the norm for me 😄 But i need to get myself sorted and back on track so needs must and all that :D
As i see it if i can`t look after myself I ain`t gonna find anyone else that will do the job for me lol. So yes body first then i can continue to sort my brain out :D
Need to get out of the house more too, I haven`t took any time off work since April last year so just booked 2 weeks off all at once haven`t took that much time off in one go in my entire working life, Aprils holiday was only 3 days long lol I`m a workaholic i swear. Not that i actually do much work watched a few TV shows tonight and a few of my new favourite video`s on Youtube 😄 And thats only because i didn`t want to set my Playstation up, Yes i have my Playstation at work, tell ya best job ever lol
Big day aswell going to shave off my beard 2 years now i have been growing it, pretty much ever since i started taking those pills for my Diabetes, Its matched my state of mind I just stopped caring, and people wonder why I`m still single lol
So yes once all this is out of the way I`m actually going to start getting back into the dating process, Might even join a couple of dating apps, I know what i want and im not looking to settle, I want to be in the BDSM lifestyle with a partner but im not looking for a sub to just be a sub im actually looking for more than that.
So yeah any good recommendations for good sites i could try would be more than welcome 😄 I tried POF years ago, More bloody Catfish in there than the entire USA river system lol So that ones a no go. Im kind of useless with such things and don`t just want to try every site going lol