So since my reawakening as it were, Today has been the hardest one so far, I almost curled back into my ball and said Fuck It. But thankfully positivity won through :)
Another shopping day with my mother and I swear If I had a gun close to hand I may have ended It, So frustrating. I should point out my mother is in her mid to late 60`s and won`t leave the house on her own, Hence why I take her shopping twice a week, I have never had a problem with this, and as i work night`s It`s easier for me to do things during the day. But from the second I saw her it was NAG NAG NAG NAG lol.
Constant all the way around the Supermarket and I hate shopping in those places as It Is, Full of inconsiderate and selfish people, just walking down the aisles and they will be stood their side by side chatting and you say "excuse me please" and they look at ya like Shit of course after the 3rd or 4th time i don`t speak i just growl basically and give em the either ya move or I`m gonna move ya look lol I wouldn`t but damn i am close sometimes 😄 I think all shopping Karts/Trollys should have horns on em or at least
this song lol (The opening at least never heard the rest of it lol)But yes today my mother really seriously pushed all my buttons at one point i shouted at her that if she didn`t shut up moaning and whining i was just gonna leave her and frack off home, Luckily she did she can tell when im seriously pissed but damn It was hard, Its also the reason i dont really open up to family cos they are all the same, It`s all me me me me Ggrrrrr. So i dont talk about my own problems hence why i bottled it up for so long.
Now I`m getting out there I`m talking again either via this blog or with friends, Trip to the pub last night and me and my friends just talked for hours about life in general was really good to just open up 😄 I even talked about my kinky side as it were lol First time ever but i explained what im wanting out of life and how i want to embrace all sides of my life. And i wasn`t drunk im still in shock lol.
Actually drinking now 2 days In a row don`t think thats happened more than a handful of times in 10 years lol Only because i got my hands on a bottle of Pedro Ximenez Sherry It`s fracking devine :D
So ye i stayed positive and overcame my first really big hurdle, For me anyways and I`m happy 😄 Watched a few of my Favourite Youtuber`s Videos kept me sane and brought a smile to my face 😄 Little bit of Gaming and im good again thats how i dealt with my stress growing up and I`m using it again now would never truly hurt anyone in real life but on a game on a TV screen ya ass is mine lol
