Cage Chat Room Munch

Sounds great ! Help with time please.

Misdee​(dom female) • Feb 22, 2018

This sounds wonderful! I will try to be there.
I need a little help with the time zone I think. I am not sure that I am understanding it correctly. 7 pm GMT. and 2 pm EST. ?
Thank you, Ms Dee

Taramafor​(sub male) • Feb 24, 2018

Both a good idea and a bad idea. As someone that is experienced with posting/roleplaying and hanging out in various online chat rooms I can detect a number of flaws yet also good ideas.

Let's start with flaws. Multiple time zones. I'm in the UK so your X time could be my Y. BIG problem if you got a 6+ hour time difference. Instead of doing only a few hours why not have a permanent room open at all hours for everyone to hang out in?

Now I want to discuss the "roleplay" that was mentioned. It's a little too directed for my taste. And not everyone is going to want to eat. The purpose of a "chat room" is to have people to hang out in. But there's going to be people that also want to do their own things. To relax in the environment in their own ways. Some of these ways might even be "weird" for many. I know mine can be to most that aren't "in the area". You say all are welcome but what about a anthro/feral hellhound that shifts between forms? Yes I know how strange that sounds. No that doesn't mean I don't want to talk about BDSM/related topics of conversation and get to know people. But that doesn't mean I don't enjoy a good time either like everyone else.

There's also posting in general. Example: "Taramafor (a /me command could be used) wraps his tail lightly around Xs waist." With such simple posts it can bring people closer. Maybe those people get to talking about things. So on and so forth. The post itself is just a very rough (and for my part short) example. What I am attempting to express is "expressing an interest" when using posts. I can speak from firsthand experience that it can go very well.

In short the environment is needed. And the community is needed. A place where people can go without being looked at as "odd" because of what they're into/how they are and be able to talk about both fun and serious matters. And I might know just the place strangely enough. I used to spend a lot of time in a chatroom on F-chat known as "the gold ring". It's a nice place for the most part. Sometimes people can rub each other the wrong way but no one ever let it bother them. We all had fun with posts and talking. In conjuration. Neither being "IC only" or "only talking". Actions as well as words in a way. Even got an online owner there. Lot of furries but "humans" are very much welcome as well. That said I'll be disappointed if such a room is made and either one isn't "allowed in the club" just because of what they are (just because it's not physical doesn't mean it's not important).

So why not make a room on F-chat? It's free and easy to do and with the number of people on that site alone it might attract interest provided the room made is interesting enough. I might even be able to think of a more "fun" room/location if there's enough interest. It's also kink focused but people go on the site for more then sex despite what the site is about. Open up a custom room, bring people in and hope the community talks about things and makes posts.

Course it's always a gamble making a chat room. Toxic people can kill it. Especially when they're judgemental. The room I mentioned earlier "the gold ring" has pretty much zero staff yet everyone gets on. In the end it's what the community makes of it. Which won't be known until it's made and people are brought in. I'm basically saying this could as easily result in heading nowhere as much as somewhere.

DrT​(dom male){NotLooking} • Feb 27, 2018

@Taramafor

Thank you for the reply.

The Cage Chat Room Munch is for the Cage, so setting up anywhere else isn't of interest to me or any of the other room moderators. The munch is held in its own room so folks who want to do their own thing are welcome to do it in the Lobby, or a room they wish to create.

The restriction on role play mirrors the real world Munch ideals of munches in my part of the world (and yes I am aware there are play munches) there being no play or overt BDSM/Fetish activity at those, thus creating a neutral non threatening place for seasoned and newbie to meet and chat, enjoy food, a drink or not. The Cage Chat Room Munch follows a similar model and while not perfect the first was successful enough for myself and the other moderators to run another, and the prohibition of role playing did not cause any issues. A friendly enjoyable time was had by all, those who wish to role play can do so elsewhere.

I concede the time thing is an issue, and not one I can do anything about, the times match points in the day when some of the worlds population are eating, so was selected to provide a point where some could indeed eat together and in some parts of the world munches happen at lunchtime, not in the evening.

The reason for creating the munch is discussed earlier in the thread, but in a nut shell it was put together to try and create a bit more community in the chat room, allow people to get to know each other, and help kick start the chat room use for those who haven't used it before. Chat room use has been dropping off in recent times, so hopefully this might encourage more to use it. That desire is for the Cage, not another site.

Anyway I hope you might attend the next Munch.

Taramafor​(sub male) • Feb 27, 2018

posting towards others (none IC posting. I refuse to call it roleplay as I keep IC roleplay separate and "rollplay" often implies "IC only") is how I get to know people. The things I do might not be "real" but I do keep things as immersive as possible. I don't get overpowered or silly with it for example. Sometimes I talk to people first, other times I talk about things after "online actions". Sometimes it's both at once. Which while sometimes not "real" will still carry "meaning". I use both my words and my actions. Both real and immersive. But it's my choice. If there's a restriction about making a post of my own choosing (my own "actions") that doesn't threaten anyone then I have no interest. If I offer someone a marshmallow then it means "I like you". As does playfully puffing smoke into someones face as we cosy up with each other (One could also use a cigarette for this. But it can both have the same context). Which might even lead to said marshmallow offering. If there's a restriction about the things I do, about how I am even, then I have no interest. This goes for my "online species" as much as how I communicate with others. I feel like I wouldn't be welcome because I feel like I wouldn't be able to express myself or even be myself. I don't expect others to post with me of course but if they happen too and feel comfortable doing that I see no harm in it.

I don't know if I'd be unwelcome or not because of "how I am". This makes me sad.

DrT​(dom male){NotLooking} • Feb 27, 2018

@Taramafor

The no roll play rule stands for all taking part, if you can't or are unwilling to respect the Munch rules regarding such then sadly you are excluding yourself from the Munch.

Taramafor​(sub male) • Feb 27, 2018

Ohh, that makes more sense. I misunderstood. I was worried you was putting "real" over "immersive" (in a way I do too but I think you know what I mean). However, one can not force interest and being interested in the people there won't be known or not until one is actually there. Not because of not wanting to take part but because one might want to try and take part yet simply struggle with it. Perhaps due to different "posting styles" for example. While I can understand that rule is trying to encourage activity it also feels a little like trying to force activity to happen.

I actually have some "posting struggles" with an online owner (she's the one that struggles in this case). No one wants to be inactive yet it can happen. I'm also picky about who I engage with. If I am interested in someone I post with them. I'm not one to just do something for the sake of doing it.

I also think most people attending will not be able to share my post style without talking a lot about how to do that. For that reason alone I'll opt out. More trouble for others then for me I think. But it's nice to know I was wrong about my assumption of the rule. Apologies about the mix up. Am I accurate in my assumption of people using stars and a few sentences or is that too a mix up? I only have my observations on Second Life to base this on and it tends to be the case with the less roleplay focused crowds (often, but not always). I always once had someone tell me to "change my skin". So I hope you understand why I had cause for concern.

Fudbar​(dom male){❤️❤️❤️} • Feb 28, 2018

Let me take a stab at this...

@Taramafor, perhaps it might be useful to speak about my experience with the last munch and give some background.

Dr T. held the last one on Superbowl Sunday amidst the same concerns about time zones and people being busy. Despite the concerns, the munch was well attended and most folks stuck around longer than the scheduled two hours.

I don't think T is going for 'real' or 'immersive' because those are descriptors than only apply to roleplaying. I think he intends the standard of conversation and interaction be one of everyday etiquette; nothing more, nothing less. You have a great deal of concerns about actions, who they might be emoted *does this* vs X does this, vs the non existent '/me does this'. Bottom line, it doesn't matter much, as long as your behavior matches that with which you would comport yourself with in a public restaurant with casual acquaintances.

Yes, there is some pressure to contribute. The event is intended to be interactive, so you'll need to speak up at some point. If you have difficulties there, T and the rest of the folks last time were very accommodating of different communications styles at the last event. Everyone was very polite, supportive and had a chance to share and ask questions at their own comfort level.

If you're worried about the ultimate offense, 'getting booted', well.. it happened to me last time. I went idle for almost an hour when I was distracted by a phone call, and Dr. T. booted me from the room for inactivity. I came back in, apologized, and rejoined the conversation with no hard feelings. T isn't a tyrannical mod with a constant grip on the banhammer, he's a polite and welcoming host.

I'd say despite everything, you should consider showing up for a bit, saying hello, and seeing if the conversation interests you. If it doesn't, a polite 'goodbye' (or *tips is hat and says his farewells* as you may prefer) will suffice with no hard feelings.

It really is an excellent opportunity to get to know other members a little better with gentle moderation without the chaos that the lobby sometimes brings.

Taramafor​(sub male) • Feb 28, 2018

@Fudbar: Ahh, but it does matter. if one posts in third person to me I am more likely to engage with them. Therefor if everyone is posting in first person and stars I am less likely to respond because my "language" isn't the same as theirs. And it's the same if everyone is posting one liners while I might be posting a few sentences. If I put in effort I want effort back after all, the very reason that rule is in place. I might take an interest in only one or two people yet not post because I know we can't "Communicate with actions" (I personally find 3rd person less limiting then stars). If I get only a one liner I find it difficult to make a post at all. Would talking alone be considered contributing enough? Where actions fail speech tends to go better. I suppose my concern is in "Communicating with posts". Be it actions alone or combined with words.

I might look into it. But I promise nothing.

Kal Foster​(dom male){felicia} • Mar 1, 2018

Hoping to be there at least for part... we have a busy weekend ahead!

Lucia​(sub female){not lookin} • Mar 1, 2018

This is in no way a complaint and I don't need the poor mods to repeat for the millionth time that it's impossible to accommodate everyone's needs- y'all seem to be doing a GREAT job- but I am simply never free on weekends (non-profit worker and bartender here). I know I'm not the only one with "non-traditional" hours so starting a Tues/Wed group has begun to vaguely occur to me (assuming this group never changes, which is perfectly understandable). So I'm curious for a headcount to gauge interest?

Again, not complaining, I understand Sunday is the obvious choice and maybe fits the average Cage user, but obviously like attracts like because of when we're online, and for me the majority of folks I have connected with individually on this site also have non-traditional hours/jobs- there's definitely a lot of us here for whom the concept of "weekend" is the opposite. Now the question is, how many of those folks are interested in a munch?

Hope this weekend goes well again, have fun everyone!