It's very simple. You talk to people. Even if they find it stressful. They might not want to hear it. But at any point they can choose to walk away. Put hurt feelings aside. You WILL have to hurt people when they're close minded and stubborn. But that aren't stopping me. It's never stopped me. I thrive on it actually.
Here's an example. At first someone told me they're not interested in a sub scene. They were stuck on the sub label. The "common" meaning of it. This actually pissed me off quite a bit. I'm anything but common. I'm not like "most others". In fact, I'd go as far as to say I'm a freak among freaks. And I'm ok with that. I'm ok with standing out. With being different. I even pride myself on it.
We had a few stressful talks. Misunderstnadings do that. But we also focused on doing some general things too. At first they said they found me stressful. BUT they also stated I was comical. I didn't fixate on the negatives. I focused on the positives. Comical=amusement. I take that fuel.
More misunderstanding talks. They just kept using the "general label". Sub this, sub that. I put a stop to it. I HAD to put a stop to it. It's not me. It's not what I'm like. I have to separate myself from the heard. I have to stand out.
So I said the following. And I'm quoting this. Word for word. Keep in mind I said it after a number of other talks (therefor proving we both have a logical mindset).
Quote: Most people won't be worth it. I know I am. And deep down I think you know that. I have to separate myself from the rest of the heard. I aim to impress, I aim to please. I don't just say it, I show it. I have a brain and know how to use it. I aim to make you laugh and smile. I've done it with others, I'll do it with you. I am confident. I am certain. I have a backbone. I have a spine. And above all else... I am loyal. No matter how hard the times. It's never been about D/s. It's always been about control. Of paying attention when someone has a bad day. Of making it about you when you want to play. Or when you lash out and need a firm wall to hold you up. That is my character. That is my person. Accept it or don't. But you get the whole. And in turn, the whole of you. I want it all. The good. The bad. The flaws and imperfections. It can't always be about my preferences alone. It has to be about you too.
They were going on about their preferences a lot. They started taking note of mine. "Both ways", you know.
At THAT point they said they're willing to try things out. At THAT point they said "Just to be clear, this isn't me giving up." Putting me in my place.
At THAT point they started treating me like a sub.
At THAT point I proved my worth.
It also helps to remind people that they want to have their way. That they enjoy getting what they want. "Little reminders" like that go a long way.