Need some advice

Crow​(dom male) - Tell the sub to anticipate their needs and wants before the session begins. If you prefer the element of surprise, don't share what you plan to do for the session but assure them you will allow them to express their needs and wants. I prefer to ask after the session has begun, 10 minutes in, 15, 30, doesn't matter, but ask them. Once they have listed what they want, grant it at your leisure or don't. It's about constant give and take rather than only give or take.

slaveMikayla​(sub female){MstrJ } - What you are describing is a bottom, and they are looking for a service Top. That is completely acceptable if that is what you are comfortable being. If it isnt what you want to be, then communicate and negotiate for what you do want/are comfortable with.

OraclePollon​(sub female){NotYours} - That is called "Topping from Bottom" my friend. IMHO, as a 24/7 dynamic, that is never allowed. I have a time and place to bring up my preferences, I have space to speak up if something can't wait. That time or place is NEVER in the immediate moment unless specifically asked. The entire point of being a submissive is to get what I need from making sure my Sir has what he needs. That means humbling myself by pushing my mental and physical state while giving it all to his discretion. Unless I need to safe word, because there is something wrong, that he is completely missing. The entire point is coming out on the other side of it, being unsure if I even wanted to go into it, and the complete feeling that he guided me through.

The other side of that, is if I ever had the audacity to deny that, or him; there would be punishment involved. Perhaps that is what needs to happen... but I would have that conversation outside of the dynamic first, as there is something missing. Yes, the point is a submissive does not make decisions, when they do, the household clashes and is not in sync. The leader of the home takes the subs wants and needs into account in every factor, but there is no debate, especially when something is already in motion. It is not the right way to ever deny your Sir something they are expecting, it is damaging to the dynamic ( Yes, Doms can get damaged too) conversation and stating expectation on both sides, can fix many things.

Mama Bear JJ​(dom female){koa} - Without getting into the right and wrong on either side, my suggestion would be for the two of you to sit down and define a list of what each of you wants and needs sexually, ranked by importance if necessary ... what you are both into and what you are not. If it truly doesn't match up, walk away. If it is something you can both work with, then narrow it down and make an agreement that the list defines the options that are and aren't on the table for play sessions and that YOU will be the one to decide what is selected from that list when you engage in them. If they can't be okay with that, walk away.

As for ending sessions. My stance on that is if I'm not comfortable or there is some reason I can't go through with it, then a safe word is used, a discussion is had, and decision made by my D about whether things should proceed or not. If there truly is a legitimate reason for stopping or continuing could cause harm, then it should end there because continuing crosses into non-consent. If that is not the case, your decision and how you choose to move forward with the the rest of the session should be trusted and respected. If they are arbitrarily ending sessions with no reason given and no discussion had, then like a above a discussion needs to be had and agreement made about it that works for both of you. If you can't, walk away.

These kind of issues are the reason these kind of discussions and mutual agreements are necessary before entering into a dynamic and engaging sexually. You can't meet each other's needs or wants, or meet each others expectations, if you don't know what they are, and trying to figure that out after the collar is already on or mid-session is a recipe for disaster.

I'm speaking as both a submissive and a former Domme, not to mention a mentor, so forgive me if my alpha showing lol