Learning the Submissive Life

This one is rough...I found someone on Tinder who has experience in the lifestyle. We got along great. We were planning on meeting and then my BPD kicked in. I started to like him which means I got nervous. I'm not enough. He doesn't like me anymore. He just talks to me when he's bored. Of course I brought these up with him and he was kind enough to correct my thoughts but my BPD needed more reassurance. His response times became longer. Further and further apart. I stopped checking my phone waiting for a response and I knew I became too much. I worried too much, my fear of abandonment showed its ugly head. I tested him to see if he would leave. He did. We only talked for a week but I got attached. My heart hurts. He seemed like everything I wanted and I scared him away. I just need to take a minute to regroup and learn.