Defining my role as a dominant

moll​(other female){owned slav} - It all depends on the infraction when it comes to my Master. Most of the time just knowing I disappointed him is punishment enough and there have been times I've gotten a few strikes with a cane to my ass. But ultimately you have to decide what type of dominant you want to be...you already seem to understand that.

SirsBabyDoll​(sub female){Pizza+☕} - You also need to understand your submissive. For instance, Moll mentioned the cane. For me, that's beyond my hard limit. Insolation is also a limit for me but there is also the difference between punishment and funishment. Personally, I dislike the word punishment. Kids are punished. Adults suffer the consequences of their actions.

Now I'm a Brat and that puts a whole different spin on things because what would seem disrespectful from an outsider's view and deserving of sever punishments, could be allowed and/or encouraged in my dynamic.

So, I'd say, define what the term punishment means for YOU. What are your limits, what are your requirements, and what is your intended lesson? What's the goal you hope to reach? What imperfections are you able to accept in another person?

Satindragon - Dynamic's are as diverse as the stars in the sky. That makes punishment just as diverse. What works for one might not work for another. As was mentioned, know your sub. If she likes pain then corporal punishment is out. Some don't do isolation or ignoring well. Writing sentences or corner time can be effective. If she is used to sleeping in your bed a night on the floor can be more devastating than anything physical.

fluffypoppet​(sub female){Protected} - Punishments for me are generally unnecessary:
- I am inclined to be obedient.
- If I am disobedient it would usually benefit more from investigation than punishment.
- Generally, communicating about an issue is enough to alter my behavior.
- Most of the time I am my own harshest critic, so you’d have to be borderline abusive to do more to me than I’d do to myself.
- All of that said, I am open to most punishments- the one exception is isolation/no contact. ✨Abandonment Issues✨

fluffypoppet​(sub female){Protected} - I only have one experience with punishment. I was threatened with no contact.
- the punishment was never executed
- the behavior changed as desired
- the cost was too high… my chest still hurts thinking about it

No contact is a hard boundary for me. Never again.

Satindragon - No contact is a hard limit for me as well.

I'mME - Fluffy Poppet,
My thoughts on this are as follows.
Whether you have abandonment issues or not, to ignore a sub is never okay, right, or, or, or . It should not be threatened either. It would be an end to the dynamic for me. To do so could cause abandonment issues in itself.
There may be some subs who don't mind and/or it may be part of some negotiated play but for the most part its not a respectful or helpful way to treat a sub.

ButterfliesAndCuffs​(sub female) - Everyone has already made excellent points so far.
I’ll just add one little thing. You can still use pain as a punishment even with those of us that enjoy pain. There’s a difference when my Sir is using pain as punishment versus pain for enjoyment of both of us.
Still as I’ve said before the worst punishments for me are the ones that are uncomfortable, take a long time, and make me reflect on my fuck up.
No contact is also a hard limit for me. Make absolutely sure your sub is okay with that in negotiations before just giving that punishment.

Max Heathen​(other male) - It sounds like punishment isn't gonna be as necessary as it would be in Slave training. Funishment, however can keep things spicey without crossing thresholds while giving an under tone of: this could turn into punishment if it becomes necessary. Your Sub/slave can then determine, under trial of pleasure or experimentation, what may be a limitation or new found pleasure. Paddle, cane, rope, gages or nearly anything depending on your Sub/slave... I chase my ^AngelBunny^ through the house, swatting her ass over a clearly fictitious infraction... the swats are well inside her tolerance but the high anxiety while I bark at her, brings her fear up to levels I enjoy. It usually ends in pinning her to the wall, rough kisses and a tease of the clit or nipples before I bark at her "now get it fukn done!" And walk away laughing. We both enjoy the play and it's nearly daily. May wanna look at that route.

I'mME - The first thing I would say is that discipline and punishment are 2 different things, though you may already know this. You speak of behind in a long term dynamic. So this is something you and your sub have talked about? They are on board? If they are then start from there.
Since you two have been together for a long time, you already have the answers within you. Many people are quick to talk about pain. Have you read any studies of how physical punishment usually does not produce the desired result?
Be forward thinking, since you know your partner, make the punishment fit the crime. You should know absolutely what they detest doing? That is a more fitting punishment then beating someone. This should be discussed with your sub.
The silent treatment is not appropriate and should never be used for punishment. What does that teach or reinforce? This is a question you should ask yourself. You are not domming anyone if you are imposing no contact or silence. It's damaging, it's arrogant, and just wrong.

Time to cook off because of tempers for an hour or two is not a silent treatment. (I can't believe I even believe I need to write this, 🙄)

I like to add for any subs reading this that do online, threats of silence, or actual silence punishments tear down the relationship. It may nor be the first time , but it is going to be there when you turn around and then the damage is done.....put those people back. Give them all the silence that the world without you haa to offer.

Your sub is your best reference for this information bc y'all have a long term dynamic. Be creative and they will remember and improve.

I don't want to overstep but punishment that is sexual is odd the table. I'm not referring to a scene involving something like that. I am referring to something outside the bedroom and it's punishment happens within the sexual aspect.

If you choose to use a impact anything , don't use it ifor bringing pleasure and then for punishment or vice versa. Lastly punishment and funishment are two different things. See paragraph above this one. I see the words interchanged and they are not the same. They are opposites.

Enough of me.

Really look to the history of being together for a long while....