Good enough.

SchrodingersDinosaur​(switch female){N/a} - Your rambling isn't silly, Panda. Use this space as you need, if spewing, prattling, or rambling helps you work things out in your head, like it does for me and many others, then don't worry your pretty little head about what anyone else thinks. You ramble on!

I heard something that really hit me the other day that might be helpful for you...

'Sometimes when you think everything is falling apart, it's really falling together.'

I'm going to try hard to remember that, so when things look like a giant mess maybe it's just that way because the Universe isn't done putting the outcome together. Like a giant pile of Legos (that are lethal when stepped on in the middle of the night barefoot!) sitting there and then somebody comes in and builds a Taj Mahal, ooh, or better yet the Death Star, complete with tie fighters!!!

Pandabear​(sub female) - Thank you! I needed that!

alewife​(sub female) - I am by no means an expert on the subject of, well, of anything. I can speak from personal experience when I say this though:
Even your negative thoughts are yours. You don't need to embrace them, but recognize them for what they are. Thoughts, your thoughts. They're yours. You don't need to love them; it's in your power to keep them or change them.
It sounds like you have a trained professional that your speaking with and that's great!
Keep your hope, but also keep your goals and what you already have been blessed with in mind.
Much love tonight!!

Pandabear​(sub female) - thank you

SSG{ENM-TLP} - Never apologize for reaching out. That is part of what we are all here for. Connections. HOPE! Always hope. Love is so complicated. There are so many things that can derail something really good. This is why we have to REALLY make a really good selection in the person we want to take those things on with. It is a challenge. It will require you to be uncomfortable sometimes. It may take you holding on until the other person is ready if you find him/her and the timing isn't right. That was the case for me and my MJS. In the meantime, do some of the hard work in getting to know yourself. Understand what makes you tick, so you can best prepare the next love in your life for what to expect. The better prepared you are to handle the bumps in the road, the longer your relationship can last. Also, consider what you're looking for. Is it realistic? Do you need to consider a broader location? Do you need to get out and meet people face-to-face? I get it. It's not easy, but I can tell you that it IS totally worth it. Never give up. Don't waste your time with those who are not your match. Your "perfect" may come along while you're tied up with "mr. will do." Know what you want and need and stick with it. I wish you the very best! --ssg{MJS}

Pandabear​(sub female) - Thank you!