Firecracker Diaries - A combination of stories, random thoughts and an appreciation log of life with Daddy

Today I got to take a ride with him...get out and see some sights I have never seen before.

We got to drive through Pennsylvania and see some of the country side. We also drove through Philly looking for the best place for a cheesesteak.

It’s extremely interesting to me how different people live their lives...I mean if you have never been to Texas...it’s extremely different than the south side of Philly. I love to see it all!!! I’m such an observer...I like to people watch and see the way different lives and cultures strive and exist. I also like to imagine what happens inside and the secrets people walk around with.

I seriously love to watch him ...just in the little things he might me doing...talking on the phone, working, driving, making me laugh, playing his games...marveling at how he is ADD and OCD at the same time...and amazed at how he is always doing 10 things at once.

Tomorrow I get to go with him again and we are going to stay the night in a new place....I think I will treat him to my new vibrating tongue ring tomorrow night in appreciation for everything he is showing me...

Until tomorrow...

This morning he had to go to work...like every morning since I have been here. I know that was part of the deal when I came here...that he still had to work every day. But today I felt selfish and wanted him to stay with me.

As soon as I came here I was notified of a death in the family...and even though this was something we had all been prepared for for several months now...I was saddened. 

The death was actually a blessing and I am glad that the suffering for this person is over...but I will not be there with my family as they say goodbye. I’m actually not upset that I will be missing the funeral...I’m saddened that there are people in my family that think I need to be there. You see...I actually hate funerals...I don’t even want one for myself!!! But there are people that think you have to be there.

I have made my peace with how the situation played out...I hope that everyone else will as well. My place is here with him and his comforting arms that hold me tight each night.

Kiss your loved ones often...and hold them tight when you can...you never know when you can’t anymore...

Until tomorrow...

G-Spot Orgasms are so wonderful...they just throw me for a loop...body shaking and spasms...and an urge for more and harder.

Tonight he made it all about me...even commanding me to not move and let him do it. I’m sure he was trying to make me squirt...as I keep getting close...but it still has not happened. He started from behind me...I was laying on my belly in the prone position as he took me from behind. Slow and steady...in and out of me...I could feel the head of his cock teasing my hole...like a lollipop urging my juices to flow. I can feel every inch of him...it’s so erotic to me...feeling him move inside of me...feeling his cock complete my insides. 

He massages my ass as he moves...gently wetting my ass and massaging all around my ass with his thumb. He pushes me down with his other hand on my neck...starts moving faster and massages harder...this makes me cum hard.

He then has me turn over and takes me again...telling me not to move...just moving slowly in and out of me. He then tells me to hold my legs up and moves to suck on my clit...I could cum over and over just like this....he is sucking on me and using his fingers to massage my g-spot....he starts going harder and faster with his fingers....and then he is fucking me again and rubbing my clit harder...I start to feel that urge to pee..I try hard to relax and just let it go...but the thought of peeing is distracting....but OMG I’m cumming and it wonderful...it’s a long orgasm...the kind that makes me want to go harder and harder!!! He cums with me and I just want to suck it all in...more and more!

I know that it will come soon...the elusive squirt...I’m so close....my orgasms are changing and I can tell my body is getting ready for it...I just need my mind to cooperate!!

Until tomorrow...

I had a discussion with one of my very best friends today. She called telling me about issues that her and her husband were having. Her husband has become really insecure with himself and in their relationship...we talked about all the things that were happening and how she felt about it. This has been going on for a while now and she’s just over it. The problem lies in having small children, a combined business and multiple joined properties...do you stay and do what people want you to be or leave and be who you want to be?

I talked with her about my experience with staying in a situation that everyone else was happy with and wanted me to stay in...because it looked like what everyone wanted it to be....but I found that the longer I stayed the further away from me I got....and by the time I couldn’t even look at that person in the mirror because I didn’t even know who she was and finally decided to change my life....a whole lot of time had passed ....and I wish I could have some of that time back. That when I realized that the relationship was not what it should be...I should have left.

I learned the hard way that we have 1 life to live....so live it happy. Your happy may not be the happy that someone else has in mind or imposes on you...make sure you live YOUR happy...and nobody else’s.

Until tomorrow...

Doing some reading today and was wondering if some of you could help me out.

If you have followed my blog you know that I just recently had my first experience with anal sex....and before it all happened I did all the preparation that I knew to do which included cleansing my system if you know what I mean and utilizing a butt plug prior. We also used some desensitizing lube which I’m not sure if it made any difference or not. But also during my experience I came close to squirting....so here are my questions...

What are the best preparations methods you use? Best types of lube? What time frame should you give yourself to prepare? 

How is the best way to get yourself to squirt? How do you know if you do??? The reason for this question is...I had the same feeling last night, but there wasn’t any huge squirt or large amount of liquid... but it felt amazing!

I know that it may sound crazy...but I really want to know!!! Tell me some good even some bad experiences you have had...what to do and what to avoid!

Thanks in advance!!

Until tomorrow....

Day 5!!! I’m finally here!!!

So after a very long day of travel...4 airports on 3 hours of sleep...carrying a purse and a bag that weighted too much....but I’m finally here!!! Surprised at how busy airports were on Christmas Day...but thankful no real problems!!

After arriving we make it back to his hotel where he prepared our dinner...which was amazing!!! I unpacked and enjoyed a shower and then crawled in bed with him. 

He was playing a game with some of his buddies so I read my book for a bit...catching kisses and lovies from each other. Then I decide that I need to change the pace. One of my rules is to always worship is cock especially when it is hard...so I did!

I started touching him and asked him to remove his shorts. Once he did it wasn’t long until I was laying in between his legs with his cock in my mouth. I gave him a long blowjob....slow and detailed at first and switching to eager and fast and changing back. Enjoying every inch of him...I love the way he tastes....and I love the way he looks at me while I am doing it.

This eventually has him remove himself from the game...even though I think part of the turn on is knowing he is getting the blow job while being on with his buddies....but he removes himself and focuses on the pleasure. He pulls me up to him and I straddle him while holding on to the head board...we are moving together and building up my climax...he allowed me to cum and then tells me to stop. I don’t want to...and my body is screaming for me not too...I start again and he places his hands around my neck....and this just makes me cum harder...I’m riding him hard with his hands around my neck....I can’t get enough....he pushes me off and then pushes his face in my pussy and sucks my clit...I’m literally shaking so hard ....the pleasure is tremendous...he’s sucking my clit pushing fingers inside of me....I feel like I want to consume him....tell him I’m about to explode and he pushes himself inside me....tells me to cover my mouth and fucks me hard. Orgasm after orgasm....and feeling him explode inside of me pushes my pleasure beyond comprehension....

I lay there while convulsions work through my body...he holds me but I can’t stop....I beg him to stay inside me for a while longer so I can get control of myself...

OMG...Merry Christmas!!!

Until tomorrow 

Day 4....I’m only hours away from getting to him. I will be boarding a plane in 5 hours!!! I have had no sleep and had a crazy day of family functions!!! But....I AM SO EXCITED!!! I don’t know if I can sleep!!!

It has been so crazy...I have way to much stuff to be away for 15 days...I seriously need to learn some packing skills or I am way to high maintenance and need to tone it down! 2 suitcases, a carry on and my purse!!! Holy smokes!!!

I promise I will give everyone the juicy reunion details soon...as I’m sure it will be interesting since I have already incurred a punishment since he has been gone.

Here’s to great travel, no delays and a super hot reunion!!

Until tomorrow!!! Merry Christmas everyone!

Day 3 means it’s now less than 48 hours until I’m back with him. I can’t wait to be back with him. It’s hard to sleep, eat, concentrate....even my blogging is random and depressing. It will change soon...I promise!

It’s interesting to me how there are so many people who have reached out to me in this space...people that relate to the feelings I have for my Master. This is the first time in my life I have ever felt to drawn to someone...so much so that it physically hurts to be without him. I didn’t even know it was possible to feel this way about someone until now.

Maybe its my submission and how it opens everything up to him...maybe it’s just that I finally found the one for me...maybe it’s both of them. Either way...I can’t help be to think how this could be beneficial to so many people. I know of so many couples that I have encountered or know...that don’t show they feel that deep about their partners.....I want to tell them how to make is better...how opening yourselves up to truths of yourself and each other and finding where you are in your own skin (or kink) just how much better not only your life but the amazing relationship you could have.

There is a weird part of me that is thankful for everything before this....as it all lead me to him....but how wonderful it would have been to have been so open and free with yourself so many years ago.

Thank you my love for finding me....for opening me...for giving me life. For I am yours....

Until tomorrow...

Day 2 is still not easier...but it wasn’t as horrible. 

I’m still feeling lost...not really even knowing what I’m doing throughout the day. Currently I’m surrounded by family...without even a moment alone...and even though I enjoy the time with them...I’m constantly thinking of him. Wanting to be with him....to be in our world together.

Is it sad that I would rather be with him than with anyone else. Does that make me a horrible person? Maybe...but the way I see it is that I love a whole lot of people....my mother, my son, my grandchildren....but I am a part of their lives and they are apart of mine...but I feel like he is my life. I would never trade any of them for anything...but being with him is food for my soul and the only way my life is complete and functioning.

My need to submit and give to him is insatiable. All of me...my body and mind. I want to serve his every need...his everything. Even at my strongest...I want to give it all to him.  Knowing that I will be with him soon helps to keep me putting one foot in front of the other.

Soon my love...soon

Until tomorrow....

Day 1 of him gone is still not any easier...even knowing that I will be with him again in 3.5 days. It’s hard...and it makes your mind go crazy... jealousy and doubt sneek in for no reason.

These days at the beginning of him being gone are the hardest for me. It’s like the evil parts of my mind boil up....make me doubt myself, makes me doubt how he feels about me, jealous thoughts and selfishness arise. I try hard to not show any of this to him because it’s not real...none of it...it’s ghosts coming to haunt my mind. Sometimes I even think it’s my subconscious trying to sabotage my happiness...you know how your mind tries to play tricks on you to protect you from what it’s use to happening...and take away what your loving the most at the moment and take you back to loneliness.

I just want to be back with him....and have a normal brain. Lol

But for now my mind is racing and I need to get some sleep and turn it off.

Until tomorrow...