a post off site entitled.....The awesome-awkward anal hook conversation.
Heres a thing - there's a factory somewhere that actually makes the anal hooks we see in the kinkypics around here. {RIGHT HERE RED FLAG....THE KINKYPICS AROUND HERE means that this person is not a fan of anal hooks which translates to...if you are into anal and want to play with anal hooks this guy is not the guy for you}.
a bunch of people come into work every day, put on their work overalls, head out to the factory, and start up the machines that bend, weld and polish up anal hooks.
they have meetings about adjusting the machines for a wider bend (to accomodate different shaped asses) and for larger knobs at the tip ( to accomodate different shaped assholes) {no factory worker has that kind of design modification power. everyone has a split in their ass no matter how big their ass cheeks are. those of us with smaller butt cheeks just end up with the hook sticking out some and makes it fun for the Dominant to hold it and play with it.....and the reason why the balls are different sizes is the same reason why there are different size butt plugs.....everyone's nerves are in different places different size butt plugs give different sensations and higher levels of sensations according to where the nerves are and which nerves they are stimulating. same thing about the balls on anal hooks...depends on where your nerves are and how much stimulation you work up to being able to accept and which part of the taboo you can get past in your mind}
the rest of the post was redundant.
what is important here is the fact that if you pay attention to things that people say about the lifestyle you can discern a lot before you invest too much time in them.
now in this case if you are 100% sure you dont want to play with an anal hook then this person would be the one to play with.
But like with all the other kinks you might have...if experiencing a anal hook is something on your BDSM wish list ...dont be shy about talking about it. and try to get the picture about the other person and how they feel about it. there will be nothing worse down the road then not getting an experience you want regardless of what it is especially if you are going to experience BDSM in real life.
The difference in the case of a spanking between cyber play and real life play is that someone is typing smack, smack, smack....and someone else is typing...ow, ow , ow or maybe 1 may i have another....2 may i have another...and thats great .....the mind can think up all kinds of things and imagine what it must feel like. But a real life spanking ....for one you will feel the strikes, and you will feel your body react, and you will feel the resulting sensations, and you will feel your body's responses ...and eventually you will hit sub space. there is a great big difference. And be sure that when someone is spanking there are techniques. It has to do with covering the complete ass with strikes and with frequency and how much pressure is used and which implements is used on any individual person.
Being the Dominant in real life is a way different animal from cyberland. And being a submissive, a bottom or a slave is also way way different.
When you are talking to someone who is a prospect pay attention to the things they say especially if you are yearning for real life play. question them extensively about their kinks, about their needs and wants and make sure you discuss your kinks, needs and wants until you feel that you have been heard and validated . If it doesnt feel right then back off. There is nothing worse than investing time when you had an idea it wasnt good for you.