3 years ago. February 25, 2021 at 4:47 PM
Dirty talk is like...
When you see a new sub and think "Ah yes, an opportunity to make a positive first impression."
So you oil up, slide into your tight Mr. Creepy pants, straighten the sleeves of your snappy blue blazer, comb your hair, check your breath, and prepare to fire off an irresistible opening message - then you remember that nowhere on her profile did it actually say "looking for a Dom who can rock a pair of tight Mr. Creepy pants."
So you adjust your tactics and instead send a message that reads:
"It's ok, don't be alarmed! See - I took my pants off!"
Guaranteed to never work every time.
(Author's note: no pants were injured during the writing of this story.)