A Dom's Tale ~ The journey there and back again

Somedays are diamonds ..... Today isn't one of them .... a musical journey

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Have you seen the cars whizzing past?

 

 

I am not entirely certain what the hell is going on lately, but for reason or another, blog after blog is apparently being reported for violations here at the cage. Now, before a mob forms and the torches get lit, let me be perfectly clear!!!

I SUPPORT THE CAGE,  AND THEM MONITORING THE POSTS FOR VIOLATIONS!!

The policies are here for our protection, each and every one of us.!!!

 

That being said, if you are not PERFECTLY clear on what (if any) violation has actually transpired,  please do not go around just seeing how many you can get taken down because you personally do not agree with the author (because in alot of cases, they are reviewed by The Cage and reposted anyway.) Take the time to READ the rules, and understand them...  they are at the bottom of every page om this entire site! One of the things I DEARLY love about this site is the tolerance we have for each other,  the common respect of "my kink is not your kink, but I won't shame it! The way we maturely debate points and learn from each other in all aspects, not just BDSM. 

 

If you have an issue with something said, speak your mind or send a PM to the author if it has offended you somehow! I think you'll find most all members here want to be productive, contributing, supportive people, and are damn reasonable when reasonably approached. You see, every time a voice or opinion is silenced amoung us, you weaken us all.

 

Now .. that being said, I have a soapbox I'll let go cheap!  :)

 

No super list would be complete without the infamous S-U-P-E-R BRAT!  But unlike her cousins from planet kink-ton, SUPER Brat is just generally misunderstood... and with good reason, she seems to speak her own language, with her own meanings. Recently a team of scientists at the Kink-Torium Research center were able to decode the true meaning of some of her more simple statements. Contrary to popular belief, she is not being "bitchy" - she just has a different way of telling you her needs, and forget submissions being "offered" ... this ain't trick or treat cowboy! Ya can't EARN IT if ya don't LEARN IT!

So what makes a so called normal Dom engage with this creature? What tasks him to undertake it? She is definitely not for the weak minded, she will test your very core until you LEARN AND UNDERSTAND her!! So I hope this helps you if you wind up in a dynamic with one of her sisters!

 

 

 

I am so sorry! I Didn't mean to sound bratty Sir!
(No way that was good Sas, my ass isn't red yet...damnit!)

 

What does it mean by "Alpha" sub Sir?
(just wait till I get ahold of that thing, I'll show YOU control)

Whats that? I broke another rule! I am sooo sorry sir!
(do I have to drop trou and spank myself b4 u get the hint?)

 

No sir, this is as submissive as I can be!
(if thats all you can make me give in! Where's my stuffy?)

 

Yes sir, I'll certainly submit to you if you do THAT!
(but only after I play your hot buttons like whack-a-mole)

 

No sir! I would never tease you on purpose!
(yup.. just like the rodeo, let's see if you can hang on for 8 seconds)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We gotta be fair! If theres a SUPER DOM! There has to be a SUPER SUB!

 

A strange being from another planet!
(cause she sure as hell ain't like any I met on this one!)

 

I have no needs you don't give me!
(well, except ... got any $$?)

 

I am DROP DEAD gorgeous!
(Really? There's a actress that's using my pictures? I'll SUE!)

 

We met 5 minutes ago, but I want come visit you right now!
(as soon as I get my car fixed ... sigh)

 

I want to talk to you all night long!
(except my phone is getting shut off ... sigh)

 

I need to start very slow, but you're hot!
(how about you buy some videos to start?)

 

My favorite color is GREEN!
(you know, grass, baby yoda, American Express)

 

Being strong like I am .. of course I am a domme!
(well .. Findomme to be exact .  whats you acct number again?)

 

 

Today began much like any other day. I woke up, and headed to my desk for my morning coffee and the ever so depressing news broadcasts.

 

As usual, Claws the cat jumped up next to me on the desk,

and Dexter the cat sat at my feet,

 

both of them simply staring at me, waiting for the morning ritual to begin. So I made my coffee, turned on the TV, and gave them both a sold head rub. After their morning head rub was complete, they headed off into their separate directions in the house to find a suitable sunbeam location to bask in, and begin their day.

 

What is it that drives these two furry roommates behaviors? There is definitely a daily routine. Wait by the door until I get up, follow me to the desk, Head Rub time!,  stand at the top of the stairs when I leave for work, headrub!, wait by the front door unitil I get home at night, follow me to the desk again, and then hangout until bedtime. 

 

Now take into consideration that these, despite how they act, are natures most efficient killing machines,  They like to sleep high up for safety, they are keenly aware of any noise in the house, they will hang out in boxes to reduce their blindside areas.  Yet with me, they are 100% trusting and loving. They roll over for bellyrubs (supposedly a sign of ultimate trust, exposing their most vulnerable area), all they want is my attention, and they trust me implcitly to provide and care for them, and are seemingly 1000% certain I will bring them no harm.

 

How wonderful would it be if we could bring that kind of trust into a dynamic? The answer is, we can. But it did not happen overnight with my 2 furry roomies,  It took time to earn that trust with them.  And, I never violated that trust either. I never smacked them around, verbally abused them, starved them, or mistreated them in any manner. Have I ever corrected them? Of course, especially when training them or stopping bad behavior. But even that corrective action was normally more showing displeasure than anything physical.

 

Do they get the occasional "Good kitty" and a whole bunch of pets ... of course!!! I also give them freedom and accept them as they are, without reservation, as they do me. And call me crazy if you want to, but BOTH of them seem to know if I have had a rough day when I get home, because they will INSIST on taking turns laying on my chest and purring and pawing. 

In short, I earned their trust, and they see me as the "alpha" in the group, the established leader if you will. Now I am NOT advocating treating your Sub like a pet, but I am saying there are ALOT of commonalities in earning their trust, and by extension their submission ....

 

And so ends my kittie comparison! Hope you enjoyed it!

 

There has been a rash of recent sightings of the masked wonder recently, so for those who do not recall or were not here when I introduced him last time, here he is again!

S-U-P-E-R    D-O-M

I am one in a million Baby!
(I'm harder to find than a covid mask at a Trump Rally)

(hee hee -- had to)

 

I am ALL POWERFUL,

(resistance is futile Earth-Sub!)

 

I know how to act in a restaurant

(You heard me order your submission... right? )

 

I have eyes more powerful than dracula!

(You are getting sleepy! So take off your clothes and run to me .. blah blah!)

 

I am MASTER of every kink there is

(And a few I keep safe from the world!)

 

I can read your mind

(So stop arguing about what you think you think!)

 

I know exactly what you need to hear!

(Now if I could only add some truth to it)

 

I never make a mistake

(I mean, we both know YOUR always in the wrong, so make it up to me sugar lips!)

 

I am cool, I am classy, I am debonair!

(So bow down baby, help me comb this hair!)

 

I attract subs because I am made of catnip for subs!

(Don't make me send another "pic" of lil' super-dom!)
(or at least give me time to google another that looks the same)

 

I have but one weakness ....REALITY.

(as long as we avoid that, you will be mine forever!)

 

 

Sooo.... call it Covid boredom, call it practical use of space, or just a desire to expand and make it better!  At any rate, I moved the playroom to my second master bedroom. Now it has has a kinky shower and full bath facilities attached to it, and lots of new mods .. And yes, All the main toys I hand built, and are capable of supporting 1,200 pounds! So without further Ado .... THE NEW PLAYROOM!!!! WARNING: Some descriptions are graphic in nature!

 

Pick a color.... any color! Alexa controlled lighting

 

The main toy! 14 differant positions available, 14 rope points, and a st andrews and kneeling 
Bench on the backside! Fuck machine and vibrator mounts included.  Tall side poles
also have clips to chain your sub to! Oh and if you are curious, yes, bench area is "Just"
the right height  :)

 

Big toy numnber 2 - full tilt operation, AND adjustable positions for arm and leg
placement, PLUS, mounting attachment for the fuck machine, and high speed
Vibrator to hold it in place automatically. So basically she's getting fucked Hard,
her clit is getting lots of attention, and I am free to stimulate everything else. 
Basically - 100% body stimulation all at the same time!

 

Same toy, showing dif positions (in the old playroom)

 

Big toy number 3 - good for spanking, flogging, or imagine laying down on the bench,
and your legs are brought up and tethered to the "T". 

 

"The Wall" - redone with real chain for arms / legs, and 4 center mounting points to tie you to the wall. Naturally,
power is located between your legs for vibrators and or the fuck machine! Adding to this soon, 3 Shibari
celling mounts

 

The paddle toys for those that prefer a little sting in their life!

 

Floggers, Crops, Canes, and other assorted items from 6whips and canemaster!

 

The Fuck machine with assorted heads, self explanatory!

 

Misc assorted toys, candles, thrusting and vibrating dildos,  and breast suction toys! Just added as well,
a micro high speed vibrator with nipple or clit attachments. Just learned a woman can have
an orgasm JUST with breast / nipple stimulation, can't wait to try that!

 

Here kitty kitty kitty!!

 

A general room overview

 

No playroom is complete without a true St Andrews and 500 ft of rope!! 

 

Collars, wax, and aftercare lotion. Also keep water based lube and toy cleaner there!

 

Misc leashes, straps, and bindings. Also Entrance to Kinky Bathroom!

 

 

 

Hey! Pick one! We all have them. some more than others. Some of us spend our lives hiding from them. But not most of us. Most of us do however share a common fear. Vanilla or Kinky it does not matter. it starts with us at a VERY young age, you know .. it was one of those "check yes or no" notes from early on. In our mind, and in our hearts, we had PUT IT ALL OUT THERE on the line! We took the plunge, we exposed ourselves to possible humiliation and worse yet ........ the possibility of .... dare I say it! ..

 

If it went well, we got a little confidence out of it for next time, but lets be real.. it probably did not go well.. did it? But .. It set an example, taught us the wrong lesson to be certain, and began to build a foundation for disaster for the future. So life goes on, our relationships become more complex,  sometimes we even stay in them just  to not be alone, or for fear of what leaving may cause to happen. But each and every time we have a relationship die, we tend to bring a little "wisdom" with us into the future.

 

 

"Wisdom" huh? More like a virtual land mine, and we bury that bugger close to us too!  We set warnings up for the future, "if X happens with another relationship, I am outta there! I know the warning signs!" Get enough of them around you and you're gonna be pretty damn safe from getting hurt.  You are also going to be alone. You see, you know they are there, but the poor fool who is trying to care for you, get to know you, take a chance on  a future with you, they don't know they are there. All they know is they keep getting blown up. And there is a limited number of times that can happen before they run for the hills (of course then you can say they just were not serious about you)

 

So what's the point here? the point is PLEASE don't judge your new flame by your old ashes! Let the past die, don't make somebody new pay for crimes in your past committed by people you yourself have even decided to get rid of! Give the poor bastard (or lady!) a chance, they stepped out there, wrote the note, just check yes or no, and if you check yes, do it with an open mind. And if you check no, just say so, most won't take offense, but rather be glad to get an answer.

 

 

Now I am not saying go into it blind, or not to use common sense, I am also not saying I myself am innocent, because I am not, what I am saying is feel from your heart, not your history. IMHO, to define a person, one could say a person is "the sum total of their life experiences"  - so no two can be alike, like snowflakes. Therefore not all actions share the same root motivation in people, we're all human, we all make mistakes,  just don't pass by a potential partner for the sins of a former.......

 

here -- give this a listen,  it may help put a fine finish on my rambling  :)

 

 

 

 

 

"    The hardest thing to do in the world is deciding to let go of one you love, when all you really want to do is hold them forever. "

 

 

      Relationships, imho, exist, thrive, and endure on three basic needs being met. The need to be loved, the need to be wanted, and the need to be needed. Yes there are many other facets and even more details that have to combine to create a lasting dynamic, but I feel eventually, they all support one of these three fundamental cornerstones that make up the basic structure of a dynamic, 

 

"The need to be loved"

    Simply put, to find somebody you can truly love, and they truly love you in return, the ying to your yang, your "Zing", your hearts desire. That person who ignites those long forgotten fires buried deep within your soul, at the innermost core of your basic existence. It is she (or he) that life's future would seem empty and barren without.

 

"The need to be wanted"

    In a physical sense, certainly, but that is a physical need, the true cornerstone lies in being wanted FOR YOU, for being the person that you are, and as some would say, and most would disagree, "to feel deserving of being wanted", but more accurately described imho as discovering somebody who wants to share their life with you, as you wish to share theirs, wholly and completely.

 

"The need to be needed"

    I cannot, do not, and will not attempt to speak for any living being other than myself on this one.  But in a dynamic, it is critical that I feel needed by my partner, and likewise, that I let them know I need them as well. Call it Dom weakness if you will, but I consider sharing that most primitive emotional need with my partner, and filling it for them as well, to be one of the most basic and binding threads two people can share. It is beyond D/s, beyond love, reaching far and deep into the most primitive areas of the heart, and consequently, one of the most fragile.

 

 

    It was for the last that I parted ways with my cherished friend this day.  Everything was there, and it was there from the moment we started talking. It blossomed and grew into a young, vibrant, and exciting dynamic whose future seemed to have possibilities beyond the dreams of avarice. A feeling she, in time, had awoken in me that I have not felt in many, many years.

    And it ended today for all the same reasons it began. Out of love. She was too much a lady to ever tell me herself, She loved me too much to ever hurt me in that manner. Had I let it be, it would have easily continued on, and she would have allowed it to continue, meanwhile making a sacrifice I could never willingly allow. But in my heart I knew the unspoken truth, I had felt it for some time, yet selfishly ignored it to be able to keep holding on to a rare treasure I had found, if only to continue to feel my soul holding hers and no other. 

 

     But today I approached the issue head on, and discovered the simple truth that she did not need me, not really.  She loved me, and I her, she wanted me, and I her, and I needed her, but this was the one part of the dynamic that could not be reciprocated.  You cannot fabricate this, you cannot fake it, it either is or it is not.  And yet, this beautiful creature would have remained with me, had I allowed it, or even simply requested it.  But without that missing thread, I would be denying her the chance she deserves, I would prevent her from finding the one she will love, want, and need.  So in my best stoic, iron man Dom impression, I set her free to find her future....

 

       So, I begin my quest again, but I do so with no regrets, and my honor intact. But mostly, I once again leave behind a small part of me with her, and I hope it somehow guides her to the happiness she deserves...

 

~ID~