Zolar: Dude, Francine gave me some insane tentacle last week.
Blorg: Are you serious? She never did that for me!
Zolar: Yeah, what can I say man, it’s crazy. She did this thing with her thorax...
Blorg: Bruh! I don’t want to hear any of this shit.
Zolar: Sorry duder, it was just so...
Blorg: Dude!? Enough already!
Zolar: Right. Sorry. So what’s the name of this planet we’re invading again?
Blorg: The locals call it Earth.
Zolar: Earth? Really. They actually named their planet “Dirt?”
Blorg: Yeah, insane right?
Zolar: Fucking humans. No imagination. Hey yo, pass the blunt.
Blorg: Oh yeah, here dude.
Zolar: *long toke* So, are we gonna, like, abduct their leader or what?
Blorg: Which one?
Zolar: Planet Dirt. What we’ve been talking about...are we snatching their leader or just vaporizing him?
Blorg: Dude, I’m saying WHICH leader?
Zolar: There’s more than one?
Blorg: Yeah bruh, like 194 or some shit.
Zolar: WHAT THE FUCK??? How does that work??
Blorg: Dude, I’m still kinda fuzzy on that myself. So like, they divided their tiny planet into 194 different sectors and each sector has its own leader.
Zolar: So it’s like a collective?
Blorg: Nah bruh, they’re all constantly competing with each other over limited resources and lame ass ideas. Pass the doobie man.
Zolar: Sorry, here. Lame ideas?
Blorg: Yeah, so like, 2/3 of the planet think that some all powerful Deity made the universe and their little planet in like 7 days or some such shit and the rest still think smart phones are a really good idea.
Zolar: Smart phones?!! Really? Geez...what kinda idiots would...?
Blorg: I know right?!!! It’s crazy.
Zolar: So what’s the plan?
Blorg: Well, I was talking to my partner, Yorn, over on Marexx 2 last night and he told me about this fucking ridiculously good weed at a bowling alley in a place called “South Bronx” so we’re gonna head over there to see this dude named Mickey.
Zolar: No dipshit...I mean with the invasion?
Blorg: Oh...that...I dunno man. I thought we’d just get fucked up and see what happens.
Zolar: Seriously? That’s all you’ve got??
Blorg: *shrugs shoulders*
Zolar: Fuck it. I’m in.
Blorg: Fuckin’ A man...so you and Francine? That getting serious or...?
Zolar: I don’t know man. You know what they say? Once you go insectoid...
