It can happen to anyone, even me, a long time sub.
Take your time, don't reveal too much until you feel comfortable. It's not a sprint it's a marathon, a long steady process getting to know a Dom with the potential of something. I have said this hundreds of times as a mentor.
i carefully followed all my own rules, it was going very well, my endorphins were coursing through me and I felt giddy. Bearing in mind that I have been on my own for quite some time, it was a really nervous excitement, craving messages and little snippets, talking about art and books and flirting. Talking about me....the me that I am now. Talking about Him, listening to Him set out his style and dynamic. It was like stepping outside on the first sunny day of the year, taking a good lungful of fresh air after being cooped up all winter. Gentle warmth on your face as the sun gains its strength.
I left the gate open, metaphorically speaking that is. Invited him into my secret garden. I opened up, shared my mind in the direction of submission, even considered that I might give it to him at some point. Like trying on a new dress or shoes....is it a good fit?
An afternoon, an evening passed, then a day. No messages, no contact.
I understand that things happen, 24 hours is the benefit of doubt. 48 hours is slightly worrying, after all who would tell me if something had happened, other than him.
Five days passed and I realised I had been 'ghosted'. No explanation, no apology, just silence. I felt like one of those blow up dolls when the seam splits. Sudden and irreversible deflation. Dropped to the floor and left in a heap. So, I picked myself up, brushed myself off and carried on, Older and wiser.
Its about six weeks now.
I saw his profile online yesterday, and again this morning, still nothing.
Just a note would do, a thanks but no thanks, even 'it's not you, it's me'. Surely I deserve that? But silence, that's the killer, like a slap across the face, foolishly embarrassed.
At at least I have my friends here, this stuff is hard to explain to vanilla friends
Naya x
