Online now
Online now

The Eroticist

I have written a blog on line for many years at TheEroticist.Com. (Lucky to get that Domain.) It is currently going through housekeeping with a new Theme, but it is still available for viewing.

As an introduction, I thought, over the next few days I might port over some of my earlier posts from my main. When I do get inspired to add a new one, I will probably post there and copy here. Please feel free to comment.
1 year ago. May 7, 2021 at 8:44 PM

“What is it? Why am I so dissatisfied?  My life is pretty good by what everyone tells me, so why am I so unhappy?”

Does this sound familiar?  I am making a huge leap here, but that certainly is where I came from. Well, folks, I am here to tell you that inside, whether or not we acknowledge them, there are flitting little thoughts about things we want to experience that drive us hard, no matter how hidden we may think they are.

The problem is that in MOST cases, the people who are telling you your life is good are ALSO commenting on those flitting little thoughts, those images that we have privately when we think of physical pleasure (even though many of them came to visit us FAR before we began to touch ourselves), The comments come rushing.  “Hey, THAT f***ing S**t is WRONG.” “It is against God’s Law.” “What would your parents think?” “If you love her, why do you want to hurt her?” “Even if they say they want it, it hurts your loved one.”

We look at ourselves from the outside in the position of some societal parent in the courtroom of an angry god.  The prosecutor comes at us, the accused, in front of a jury made up of our parents, Sunday school teachers and maiden aunts, all looking at us over their glasses with scorn and contempt.  “If THIS is what you LIKE, if THIS becomes acceptable then…”  Oh I don’t know, society in general will fall into the abyss of war and damnation and no one will ever eat ice cream again.

Well, grow up, kids. If those little flitting thoughts (images of Tinkerbell float by) are STILL THERE, then it is time that you acknowledge that they are part of you, part of what makes you who you are, and absolutely time that you come to terms with it and begin to LIKE who you are.

Now before you go jumping off the cliff into personal anarchy and uncaring concentration on narcissistic pleasure, what you want is going to be far more pleasurable if your partner wants it too. If that is not a care of yours, I advise you strongly to seek therapy.

It is time, I think, to explore ourselves. To look honestly at who we are and accept what we want.  We should enter onto the path to get those things that we have consistently thought about.  (Oooo, Tinkerbell is suddenly showing teeth and some cleavage.)  We are NOT going to get it if we cannot be ok with it.  Guilt is a killer, guys.  Think of it, there have been moments, hopefully in each of our lives when someone said, “OH, yea, me TOO!”  What a release.  Well, say it to yourselves.  Be OK with who you are.  Ask for what you want.  No other way to get it.  Wake up and smell the pixie dust.

I think it is important to emphasize that this is particularly important for submissives. While many of the "voices" I spoke of were directed at sadistic old me, the ability of a masochistic submissive to clearly communicate HER (or HIS) Sexual, Physical, Behavioral and Emotional desires is of paramount importance. How else can negotiation go on. You may wish eventually to do nothing but satisfy your Master's desires, but until that negotiation is completed, you must clearly communicate YOUR position.

The Eroticist

1 year ago. March 10, 2021 at 10:40 PM

I was in a dialog with a gentleman who mentioned some issues beginning with a quoted statement on how a slave “will always act and respond in such a way as to make the Master’s orders look ‘right.’”

That brought up conflicting views in my mind.  I will start with an example.

As I enjoy using a single tail, I often attend single tail demos.  At one convention demo I was quite impressed with the lecturer until he told me that a Master should never admit to a mistake.  This was very conflicting for me and he lost my respect.

In my opinion/view/experience humans tend to like to be right, but often aren't.  So, do we admit to the mistake, learn, improve and show respect to those who showed us a differing way, or do we refuse to admit the mistake, work to convince ourselves of the rightness of our actions, or gaslight the other into thinking it was their understanding that was incorrect?  I think if you observe the people of authority around us, both religious, legal and political, you will quickly come to the conclusion that the latter is the more common.  But I do not feel it is the more advantageous for either the observed or the observer.

Now, I will be the first to admit that the example I gave does not exactly match the question asked.  But it applies.  Do I want a close and valued partner to encourage a possibly human tendency to feel I am right no matter what, or would I wish them to respectfully express a contrary viewpoint.  What I would wish is that they respectfully ask if this moment would be the appropriate moment to ask a question and if it was, to be sure they were clear in understanding the answer I express, and then, and only then, to express their viewpoint as to a possibly better way to accomplish that goal.

Obviously, all of this is context sensitive.  If necessary, I would rather they fuck all of that BS and pull me out of the way of the damn bus.

Please understand, I make mistakes.  I believe being a MASTER means I know who and what I am, and know my limitations.  I cannot tell you the number of fuck ups I have accomplished by being RIGHT.  I would rather be better.

I believe firmly that I gain more respect and admiration by working to be better and  respecting the viewpoint of my partner than I would by continuing the sham of playing "right" no matter what.

As for being right in my communication, I continually encourage the most outstanding question, "My Master, what did you mean by that?"

The gentleman with whom I was conversing replied at length and then said, “I am focusing on situations where she is needlessly snide, sarcastic and caustic.”  This was important to me and I wrote back.

I asked him to keep in mind that I did not know the particulars of their relationship, neither the constructed protocols they both had created together nor the more "humanesque" immediate responses he had experienced.  (Though I did say that what he described seemed to fall more into the latter.)  But all I could speak on were my own particularly heart felt desires.

"Respect is to be greatly valued.  I try to continually express my respect of my partner by valuing her opinion and seeking her views on all subjects.  As I repeatedly tell her, I want her opinion on all things so I can make the most informed choice.  But the choice is mine.  She is the supporter, I am the leader.

But in her expression, I remind her that respect is due from her as well....Does she want to be in a relationship with someone she admires and respects?  Then treat me that way.  If she feels I am acting disrespectfully, then respectfully express that opinion.  Returning disrespect only creates a disrespectful relationship.  She absolutely has the right to call me out when I treat her disrespectfully. (Unless it is in a negotiated aspect of our relationship or scene, but that's a whole different kettle.)"

I am reminded of a lecture from Master Obsidian and Namaste.  They describe a serf approaching Royalty and saying, "Hey, you really messed up here."  To which the appropriate response is that of the Queen of Hearts.  However, if the serf has a legitimate complaint, and informs their Master with increased respect and deference, they are, in fact, reminding their Master of his responsibility for the maintenance and well being of the relationship.  A point I have remembered for many years.

"Another thing I mention to her is Mindfullness.  That is a common term in Buddhist practice and other forms involving meditation.  It speaks to how immediate responses are usually not our most affirming and respectful ones.  (Just look at the most public tweets we see today.)  This goes to both of you.  Think about what you do and the intent of it.  Is it to promote a more joyous and mutually affirming and respectful relationship, or is it to spew out your immediate grumbleness?

I catch myself here with a smile because there is little I might enjoy more than "disrespectful banter" between my partner and I.  But there is always a clear consciousness of the love and respect behind it.  (If not, I do have a large paddle.  She, unfortunately has no such resource.)

Now, I tend to be an immediately confrontational person.  If my partner expresses herself disrespectfully, as she can do after a stressful day at work or if I hit a historical stress button inadvertently, my first questions might be, firmly "Why are you here?"  "Why are you in this relationship?"  You see, the thing I most enjoy about the D/s or M/s relationship is that We think about it.  All parties are required to work to bring that relationship to what we define as best for us.  Why else are we here?  If that is so, then respect is necessary."

OK, enough pontification for this day.  But I can not leave without a comment on his last substantive paragraph.  He had told me, “We've only been together for about 7 months now. While she considers herself to be well versed in being a slave after having been in such relationships for the past decade or so (albeit they have all been unhealthy and abusive), I am relatively new to the role of being a master.”

Time does not equate to valuable experience, unless it is learning from your own unproductive choices.  But it can confuse one into thinking they have authority.  Informing, talking about previous situations can be good, and I would definitely ask what aspects of her previous relationship were valuable and affirming to her and what were not, but remember, she informs, you decide.  Do not give her authority just because she has a longer time for experience.  The relationship you create and maintain is the one between you and her, no one else.

[3/10/21 - The above was an edited post from possibly a year ago.  But I had occasion to talk this morning with my much loved wife, with whom I am separated.  We talked for a long time about entitlement and the current restructuring of male-female relationships in the US.  My views have a lot to do with being a mature gentleman (read-Old Fuck) as well as being White, well spoken, tall, and raised in an affluent suburb of Chicago in the 50s and 60s.  I was entitled to use my body and words to touch, in a way now accepted as inappropriate (though not abusive) a woman in whom I had interest.  The reason I was entitled was that No One Told Me Different.  It was the way things were done.  I mention this because it is one of the reasons I enjoy this lifestyle.  I want to be told.  I want to learn.  I want to be able to act differently.  But I want, also, to have the ability to find a partner with whom I can negotiate a relationship affirming to the Horny Old Fuck that is Me.]

1 year ago. March 3, 2021 at 11:21 PM

I wanted to talk a bit about myself.  You must understand that what I am about to say about myself, to the extent that I can possibly manage at this time of my life, is absolutely the truth.

Within the context of the lifestyle, I am very much a Dominant.  Now I do not know what that means to you, but to me that means I care deeply about the health and well being of anyone who negotiates and agrees to give me some type of authority over their lives and behavior.  I enjoy giving pleasure and self-centeredly, I greatly enjoy the attention and admiration of those who appreciate the pleasure I give them.  Some call me “set in my ways.”  But that is one of the pleasures one gets as a Dominant, people who wish to please you by doing things your way.

I am also a sadist.  To me, that means that I study and educate myself in how to apply extreme sensation play to willing partners who enjoy the stimulation that gives them, and specially to those who can easily transform that sensation into erotic excitement.  I do this for our mutual enjoyment.  I want to know what it does to you, and if my actions carry you to a place where it is unpleasant or you feel it is damaging, I want you to tell me.  If mistakes are made, I will definitely apologize and do what I can to make things right.  But I try to find out what excites my partner, and explore ways to make that excitement greater.

As I have said many times before, I seek a deeply bonded long term relationship with sexually open, highly responsive women who profoundly appreciate what I can do for them.

Now that I have said this, you need to know that I do not want you to believe a word of it.

I am a sadistic Dominant, and all Dominants are manipulators.  Just because I said it, and I truly believe that it is true, doesn’t mean it is.  Anyone can say it.  It is YOUR responsibility to watch, observe, and see if they are consistent in their actions with what they say. People enter into this lifestyle for a VAST number of reasons. I am here because I feel it is a place where levels of bonding between people can be very deep and intense, and that is what I want. But there are others here because they think people are sexually loose and they hope they can get a quick easy fuck without putting in the time to develop a good relationship. Still others are here because they have serious problems forming a relationship, or even have issues with anger towards certain people or possibly groups, men or women as a whole.  Others believe that the only way they can feel good, is to make others feel bad.

People do get hurt in this lifestyle and I am not talking about physical injuries.  I believe there are less injuries and deaths per capita in the lifestyle than certainly extreme sports or things like football even outside of the profession.  But emotional injury is a far different issue.  People lie here.  Go to any on line BDSM oriented dating or community site (I fear that it is true on any community site, but my experience is here) and there are a large number of people there who portray themselves as someone far different than who they are.  Some are just desperately hungry and want what they can’t get in their marriage, so they lie.  Some truly wish they were someone other than who they were, more beautiful, handsome, rich, talented, whatever, so they lie.  Some don’t think that someone else would truly enjoy what they enjoy, so they lie.  Some feel so poorly about themselves that they can not accept that someone else could enjoy their company, so they lie.  Some few are truly violent predators, and they lie.

Offline and in person there are also many who wish to portray themselves as something they might wish to be, a highly trained bondage expert, a medical expert or a knowledgeable presenter.  I personally have seen presenters who had tied and flogged people and did not watch as they passed out and fell off a stage sustaining a concussion, or a certified Phlebotomist who was so flagrantly unhygienic with the equipment she used that her demo bottom had 15 infected wounds a week after the demo.  Or simply public players who pay far more attention to their audience than their partner.  And if you hear some rumor that a highly respected and recognized community active Dominant has been accused of abuse, do not toss it out of hand.  If it affects you, talk to the accuser and see for yourself what the situation was.  Perhaps nothing, perhaps just assumptions gone wrong, but perhaps there is truth there.  We sometimes allow truly horrid behavior to go on far too long, simply because it is someone who is respected in the community.  We were all so incredibly surprised on hearing about Mr. Sandusky.  Need I remind anyone of some few members of the highly respected Catholic Church?

Remember, I can say anything about myself, particularly in text communication.  And for another hungry person, even an honest caring one who might be taking those first frightening steps into a world they feel is magic, but oh, so different, it is easy to believe, because they want to so much.  Well, Don’t.  Don’t believe what you are told.  Look to see for yourself. Take the time to see if their actions follow their words.  Talk to others in their community and see if they are known and accepted.  Talk to people who have had relationships with them.  Take baby steps before you dive off the cliff.  Be safe, stay happy.

But after all of this, please remember there is, truly a magical world out there for those who want it.  It can be mind expandingly wonderful.  But it is a world of extremes, and to every extreme, there are two sides.

The Eroticist

1 year ago. March 2, 2021 at 5:32 AM

This was written a while back, shortly before Covid.  A difficult time for me.  

But I try to observe what goes on around me and those observations do seem to bring me to some unusual conclusions.  I hope the links still work.

I am an artist, as many of you know, and today I was buying thread for my next construct.  One aspect of this one is a progression of threads going from light to dark.  In the store, to the consternation of a few women with children, I sat on the floor with a large number of spools, trying to get the right progression.  An issue seemed to be that some colors darkened with a more yellowish cast, and some with a more blueish.  No problem, just pick the right ones and go home.

Out in the car I put on my sunglasses for the drive and noticed the colors again.  Changes, many changes.  But not enough to go through the shopping experience again.  Once home, I looked at the colors once more.  This time without glasses under daylight coming in through the window rather than direct through polarized glasses or the bright store lights.  Here, as I am sure you would all expect, the colors were again not exactly the same.  This, as you would also expect, put me in mind of Cilantro and green peppers.


My good friend and former wife hates green peppers.  I do not.  I hate Cilantro.  She does not.  But it does not have anything to do with our taste in food, more in the cause of that taste or how we taste our food.  (Here is a short rather simplistic article on it.  Here is a short one specific to my differences with Cilantro.)  How I taste things may not be how you taste them.  Think of that next time you ask, "What do you mean you don't like....?"

(There is an interesting article in the Business Insider on biological and behavioral differences between Liberals and Conservatives that goes far beyond political differences.  Particularly interesting in these current times.)

The point of all of this is that what you received from the world, what you perceive, those elements which move in and around you to make up your day, differ and change depending on where you are, where you receive it, and the nerves, genes, sensing organs and the brain that interprets it. This is why you should look around you.  There is beauty there that is given just for you.  Truly, No one else can see it.

But this is a blog about my views on relationships within a Daddy/lg, SM, D/s, and M/s relationship.  It involves how one takes responsibility for the Trust and Care of another human being who has given you a certain authority over them.  Please understand, They are not you!  What is easy for you may not be easy for them.  They may perceive the world in vastly different ways that are profoundly different than how you do.  Give them room to be who they are.  First, it is the differences that give the joy in this lifestyle, but also it is exactly those differences that open a window for you to see how the world can be perceived in ways that are new and exciting for you.

So, I suppose what I am saying is that when conflicts arise, perhaps the very first thing that should be done is...breath, ask, "What do you mean by that?", understand that they are differences between you and them that may go far beyond your current understanding, and let them love Cilantro.

1 year ago. March 1, 2021 at 5:27 PM

By request, this is an older post from my General Blog.  I will edit a bit with my current outlook


I often think about questions and the responses they engender in my mind.  What questions are important in a relationship, particularly at the beginning, particularly in this strange lifestyle we call BDSM.  So before I move on, I want to ask you, my readers, what questions you would ask or want answered within yourself and by your prospective partner when beginning a relationship.  Seriously, I want to know what is necessary for you, what is important.  Send them as comments or write me directly.  I want to know.

I recently saw a post from a young submissive (not on The Cager) who said she needed help.  The question she gave me was, “How can i better serve?”

That is a very open ended question and has a large number of possible answers.

I would say, look at what you are good at. What was the original attraction between you?  Was it your beauty, your sensuality, your willingness to throw yourself into his direction, your enjoyment of extreme sensation, your knowledge and expertise?  What was it that attracted you to him?  What do you want to encourage in him?

Is your relationship based in a sexual relationship, service relationship, play or SM? Is it a 24/7 live in relationship, a long distance, primarily text or phone relationship?

Have you asked your Dominant/Master what it is that He wants most?

I suppose what I am saying is that the first step to any form of service is communication. You should work towards clear, transparent channels between you.

This means that the first efforts should be within yourself. What is it that you want? I do not mean that in a demanding, get what you want kind of mode, but that you have to know what you want so you can tell your Dom/Master clearly. Inform him. Only that will allow him to make the right decisions. Obviously, he has to do the same. He has to know what he wants, so as to clearly inform you in how to please him. So communication comes first.

The next thing, in my mind, is to spend a lot of time examining your assumptions. The most valuable question to ask is, “What do you mean by that?” I have said many times that there is no rule book here. You both have to discover what the other means. An amazing amount of stress cam come from assuming you know what a word means to the other. What does “Service” mean to you? What does it mean to him? ASK! Be clear!

Do you want to serve him in any way possible, even if it is incredibly uncomfortable to you, painful, just because you are tremendously affirmed just by serving him? That works for some people, but do not assume it is what he wants, nor what service means. If it is not something that truly affirms you, but it is something that he wants, that dynamic will work against your long term relationship.

Conversely, if you assume that is what he wants, and so do things that are truly difficult for you when what he wants is to excite and astound you, then when he finds out you are suffering, he will be hurt and disappointed. He may not wish to be hurting his toy.  Do not assume. Find out.

My last partner, would not argue one bit with the thought that I am a strong sadist. But many sadists would argue with that term because I love a classical masochist, a pain puppy who wants me to hurt them until the only thing they want to do is fuck me. The observer told me, “You’re not a sadist, you’re a very nice guy.” But that is because sadism to him was making his partner suffer, for him.

Every term we use in the lifestyle is open to personal interpretation. So ask, “What do you mean by that.” It is a very valuable discussion.

There is nothing wrong with questioning the orders or directions of your Dominant.  (I assure you, if he is a good Dominant, he is doing that all the time.)  It shows you wish to understand.  Questioning yourself is also a worthy exercise.  Even in the deepest Master/slave relationship, where obedience is the only requirement, to obey, you need to understand.

I would say it is even appropriate to question the relationship.  If you hear, inside yourself, questions about the care and intentions of your Dominant.  You should listen hard.  For if doubt comes in, it should be questioned and respected, answered and discussed.  But THAT discussion is for another time.

The Eroticist

1 year ago. February 28, 2021 at 5:05 PM

This is a follow-up to the previous post, so do not think I am referring to commands given to someone who has given you authority.  Nope.  Tiz about Dinner.

Oft it seems that The Book of BDSM says a Dominant must eventually order all meals for those in their charge, this is but one step in "Path to Ownership" where the DOMINANT controls all things submissive: behavior; protocols; dress; meals; bathroom use; career; friends; relationship with family.  (Those wise will notice the flags of abuse.)  Ok, that was a rant.  Probably took it to far.

Now beyond the aspect of turning a person into an animated piece of meat, I am reminded of a college lecture on people who are suffering from a series of failed relationships.  If you listen, you might find the first descriptions of their partner to be eerily similar to the early description of their previous relationship and to the beginning description of their next.  The problem comes when it becomes obvious that the person they are dealing with is not the fantasy person they are describing.

SOLUTION!  Become their Dominant.  Then you can make them act exactly the way you fantasize.  The trouble is, all of that is coming from you. STOP!  (Whew, do I need a rest?)

Look at this person, this being that has the possibility of giving you everything that they are.  Did you hear that?  Everything that they are.  To do that, they need room.  Room to be, and room to show you who they are.  It is the glorious discovery.

OK, let us wind this whole thing back to Dinner, and ordering.  What would happen if you handed HER (OK, yea I am a Cis Het Male.  Use the pronouns you want) HER the menu and said, "Order for me."  What is she going to do and what can you learn from it?  In a very short and incredibly informative moment you will see how well she knows you. Of course, you can always say, "Thank you, but the shrimp scampi looks really good."  Then, obviously, because she is an intelligent and incredibly loving woman, she asks, "Is that a 'now' or an 'always'?"  But think how delightful it would be if she gets it Spot On.  When she shows how well she takes care of you.  Damn, that is a fine feeling.

See the point is, it is impossible to know her completely, nor is it possible for her to completely know you.  We talk about how submission is a gift.  Give her the room to show you what that gift could be, the discovery.  Let her surprise you.  She has gifts you know nothing about.  Let her give them.  Glorious Discovery.

The Eroticist


1 year ago. February 28, 2021 at 4:05 PM

Next time you go out to dinner with someone you love, as you pull out their chair and move them in, gently run your hands down each arm and softly move their hands either behind them, or if that is uncomfortable, into their lap, and whisper into their ear, “Do not move.”  They will probably respond with, “What?”  Just repeat, “Do not move” as you pat her hands.  Perhaps cover them with their napkin.

Eating this way makes the accustomed task unusual, something physical that you share together. It makes it a time of play, of closeness, of sensuality, of one taking charge, control, and using that control to serve the one you love.  It is a dance.

Order for both of you.  If they are wise, they will accept whatever you decide.  It is only one meal, after all.  Then, as you continue conversation as you normally would.  You must feed them.  You must convey each fork or spoonful to their mouth - Serve.  They must open for you - Receive.  Your timing must match - The Dance.

On the practical side, it is easier if you sit at a small table and face your partner, be careful with the beverages and don't dress in your best.  It can be tricky.  Enjoy.

The Eroticist

1 year ago. February 26, 2021 at 4:54 PM

I am not sure the cause of this writing. Perhaps my 73 years, perhaps it's being alone, perhaps being stuck in my house with no water and fear of power loss for the last 3 frozen days.

I enjoy strong sadistic play. I enjoy deep submission. I enjoy beauty. I enjoy pretty girls doing dirty things, particularly when they enjoy doing them with me. But what gives me the most pleasure by far is the overwhelming passion of my partner.

Some have suggested that I am a service top. I reject that. The deep submission of a young lady dedicated to me and our mutual pleasure is a goal for which I will fervently work.

Some tell me that stating the importance of sex in any relationship with me will convince prospective partners that I am just the usual dirty old man looking for a good deep throat and little else. I reject that as well. The power and reward of a deeply bonded relationship of negotiated imbalance and equal value and respect is not to be diminished.

But within all of this, what I really want to say is that my partner's physical responsiveness and sensitivity is far more important than my own. I truly love large well formed breasts, but if the good lady can cum from stimulation, gentle or severe, of her nipples alone it is an overwhelming plus. If she can cum to a huge degree once, that is lovely, but 50 times through the day, that fills my heart. Knowing that I have created an overwhelming climax in my partner as much more important than cumming myself. I do not mean to say that I do not want a partner who dedicates herself to giving me pleasure, working to increase her ability and learn more techniques to cause me to cum often. But having her stand naked in front of me, legs spread and hands behind her head while I sit, fully dressed and slowly caress, toy, and enter, encouraging her fluids until she cums over and over, until she seriously can not stand it further (lol, though it is not her choice) is one of my greatest pleasures.

So if you feel that makes me just another dirty old man, Peace be with you. Find what brings you joy. Conversations welcome.

1 year ago. February 26, 2021 at 4:46 PM

I want to talk about a kiss.

As I am a heterosexual man, I will talk from my point of view but it can be between any two people.  Understanding that, close your eyes, quiet your mind, breath, and let your mind remember.  Remember the smell of her, her breath, the warmth as you approach her mouth, how her body feels and moves within your arms, the first touch of her lips, how those tiny muscles move as you lightly touch her lips with yours.  All your attention is right here, right at the point of touch.  All your senses are alive at this moment, at this point of touch, the warmth of her, the smell of her, the taste, movement, sounds and REALITY of her.

I want you to remember how she reacts to your movements; does she open at the touch of your tongue?  Is there a deeper breath or a sound as you move into her?  How does she RECEIVE your kiss?  Does she confirm your actions, does she submit to them.  Because that is what it is all about.  You are kissing her.  She is receiving your kiss.  You are acting upon her and she is showing you by her sounds, breath, and movement that she is accepting your kiss.

Now obviously, this action, this acting upon and receiving acceptance can go both ways and can even change back and forth in the midst of a kiss, but my point is that this kiss, and in my opinion all human sexual activity comes in this form, one person acting upon the other and the other accepting that action.    I will go a step further and say it is my belief that all forms of human sexual activity have this element of one person dominating the activity and another allowing it or submitting to that dominance.  It is play, back and forth, tumbling above and below, taking action, being acted upon, taking control, giving up control.

OK, OK, I can hear all the chairs suddenly move back as the human rights activists rise to their feet in indignation.  “HA, the male Dominant forcing women into SUBMISSION.”   Ah, well, I kinda like that, but what I need comes when it is NOT forced, when my partners willingly allow it, choose it, and desires it from me, for my Dominance can go only as far as the woman is willing to submit.  Ever try to French kiss a girl who does not want it?  It is a good way to get your tongue bit and a great way to end a relationship.

Dominance can only go as far as the submission allows, no further.  LOL, so who has the power, Buckie?

The Eroticist