Reasonable Limits and Ruined Orgasms

Reasonable Limits and Ruined Orgasms

TheLittlePrincess​(sub female){SSG} • Feb 8, 2020

Okay, so I asked these questions in my blog and would like to see more answers. These don't relate to each other but have been stuck in my head since seeing something about them. I am looking for genuine answers. Maybe there is something I misunderstood or completely missed? I don't know. You tell me. Thanks in advance for any replies.



1. Reasonable Limits

I have seen on quite a few profiles that the person will respect all reasonable limits.

What makes a limit unreasonable? If someone has a limit, even if it seems ridiculous to the other person, shouldn't it be respected? If the limit is that important to the person, then why can a Dom/me decide if it is reasonable or not? Is there something I may be missing here?



2. Ruined Orgasms

So I have seen it defined as either right before the orgasm, the stimulation is taken away or right as you start to orgasm then the stimulation is taken away and doesn't give as much pleasure from it.

Which is it? And isn't the first description just edging? Is it different? Also, if it is the second definition, what's the point in that??? Why would you want to get your sub to orgasm only to make it completely unsatisfying? Is it just to show control or what? I mean I understand why you would have your sub edge a bunch of times but not really understanding why you would want to ruin an orgasm you allowed them to have. Anyone have any experience with this?

IowaDom​(dom male) • Feb 8, 2020

Why RUIN the orgasm, you take her to the brink of orgasm, before it actually starts, then pause and restart, a few rounds of this will usually produce a mind altering, fireworks imagining orgasm when finally done all the way.

And reasonable limits are just that, we talked about our limits, we respect them, regardless of what they are, they are the "no fly zone"

Misterasmodai​(dom male) • Feb 8, 2020

Reasonable limit is a term used in the knowledge that before engaging in any play (and therefore having the option to cross limits), a conversation will be had that covers each of your individual limits, defining them as is necessary. It is a place filler term that is probably not the best term to use, but that is what it is for now.

Ruined orgasms are orgasms that have begun and are then ruined in some manner, maybe with pain or by otherwise breaking the sub’s concentration. They are oftentimes meant as a punishment, but like every other conceivable punishment, there is a community that considers them a desirable form of play.

Erick​(sub male) • Feb 8, 2020

Talking about "reasonable limits" is like talking about "usual limits," a phrase you use in your own profile. If a person has particular limits that are not reasonable or usual, it is reasonable and usual for them to mention them.

But otherwise, it is a shorthand way of saying: Terms and conditions apply, void where prohibited, one per customer, while supplies last, keep out of reach of children, not intended to treat or cure any disease, sold as a novelty only, not responsible for damages or injuries or lost or stolen property, always consult your doctor, investments carry the risk of loss, lea todas las instrucciones antes de usar, your actual mileage may vary.

As for ruined orgasms, causing sexual excitement and then ruining the pleasure of the release is a way of causing frustration and unhappiness, which is oftentimes appealing to sadists and masochists.

Reasonable Limits

JD Dom​(dom male) • Feb 8, 2020

You are correct, a Dom should respect ANY limit you have. I think what is meant by saying, "I will respect any reasonable limits." is that the Dom is interested in you and desires to start something with you unless you have unreasonable limits. What is "unreasonable" will differ from Dom to Dom. For myself, I would consider a sub refusing anal sex as unreasonable and I would choose not to start something with her. I am a sadist, so if I was told a sub would accept no activities stronger than a hand spanking, I would consider that unreasonable. She is entitled to set any limit she wants, don't get me wrong. But I won't get involved with someone who limits activities most common to this lifestyle.