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master disaster​(dom male)
1 year ago • Jun 14, 2023
master disaster​(dom male) • Jun 14, 2023
I'mME wrote:
master disaster wrote:
TopekaDom wrote:


Well that is certainly horrible. But it should be noted that is about a single serial killer who happened to be into bdsm. Considering that the other 99.99999999% of us are not in fact killers, you may be at just as much of a risk inviting in the plumber or tv repairman.

But I always say it’s a good idea to go on a no expectations date first just like in any other kind of hookup.


99.9% may not be killers but how many are abusive people?


Who knows?.. too vague, and probably the same exact percentage as the populace at large.
I'mME
1 year ago • Jun 15, 2023
I'mME • Jun 15, 2023
YourBatedBreath wrote:
The answer is.... YES. Whether it fits a traditional and rigid Dom/Sub label... is debatable. It's certainly not a relationship so it's more in the "flash Dom/Sub role encounter" category.



Flash Dom/sub role?
Hookups are huge that . 2 people hooking up. You used the word rigid. There are as many different D/s relationships as there are different Doms and subs.

The one thing they aren't are hookups. There is no dynamic in a hookup , or it isn't a hookup.

Topping/bottoming describes hookup activity if BDSM activities are involved.
NkdBrent
1 year ago • Jun 15, 2023
NkdBrent • Jun 15, 2023
Very nice to meet you
Little Vixie​(sub female){Mgh30}
1 year ago • Jun 17, 2023
If I want a bdsm hookup, I got to my local bdsm club. I have a hard time trusting people who claim to be doms online. They say they can dominate, but it ends up being some hair pulling, choking, and them telling you to call them Daddy. My club is hit or miss with doms, but I have a couple of people that I know I can go to the club and play with.
Chalybe​(dom male)
1 year ago • Jun 17, 2023
Chalybe​(dom male) • Jun 17, 2023
There are a lot of wannabe "Doms" out there that don't know what they are doing. Not serial killers, but could still mess you up, example, nerve damage from someone that doesn't know how to tie. I see a lot of them "don't have any limits".... great, so I can cut your fingers off? Idiots.

I'm a member of a local group. They have play parties every month or so. Pick-up play is fine and encouraged, but the first top that does not honor a safe word is going to have road rash from the sidewalk when they get booted. People look out for each other.

Since I am a member of this group, people know me and new people can ask those folks if I am safe. I'm doing "Service top" for one young lady right now. Since I am a member, I can get references on subs before I agree to play.

I am strongly suggesting you get on Fet, find the local munch, and start attending, Introduce yourself to people, make friends. It takes a little bit for the group to accept you, but that;s good, they just wanna watch you a while to make sure you're sane. Go to play parties and do pick up play. You might meet a regular play partner or three.
Emofcker
1 year ago • Jun 17, 2023
Emofcker • Jun 17, 2023
Anyone in Florida looking to hookup haven't had sex in a while and have been wanting to have some fun
CapnRick​(dom male)
1 year ago • Jun 17, 2023
CapnRick​(dom male) • Jun 17, 2023
So a true story, happened two years ago to me...

I messaged a new sub, in an executive position, middle aged --my fave kind of smart capable woman. BUT she hadn't been in the cage long at all, and must not have read the assorted warnings to new subs sprinkle through the Cage.
Anyway, she was traveling past where live, and next thing I knew she showed up on my doorstep ready for a scene. I could have been ANYBODY EVIL or otherwise dangerous.!

Thank the gods it was me instead. I had her Present for me, and explained what I would do, then why the blindfold and restraints, and the toys I used.
She was ecstatic when it was over, tears of relief and joy, etc., and stayed overnight before heading home.

BUT this was exactly the sort of one time scene you are asking about... I thought she was a superb natural sub, but we never met again, though we almost did several times.. Distance and her increasingly visible executive status got in the way.

So my experience tells me that sometimes--certainly not always-- a quicky kinky meeting between near total strangers CAN work well., and produce spectacular sensations.

But yes, Miki, dangers abound doing this sort of meeting...
SmilesEight​(dom male)
1 year ago • Aug 10, 2023
SmilesEight​(dom male) • Aug 10, 2023
I agree with the original poster. Life is always busy. Just like in a vanilla relationship, finding a good partner could be as hard as finding the unicorn. Maybe a good BDSM partner is even harder to find than an unicorn. Maybe a "safe" hookup is not such a bad idea.

I double-quoted "safe" meaning you set-up the logistics to be as safe as possible, however you do it. Honestly, it's rather very similar to a vanilla hookup for even first date.

Utilizing hookups, you may actually be able to find your unicorn. But anyway, I'm open to the idea of hookups. I'm in the Los Angeles / Inland Empire area in California. If anyone want to give it a try, feel free to vet me and my profile, etc.
Sincorrigible​(sub female)
1 year ago • Aug 10, 2023
Sincorrigible​(sub female) • Aug 10, 2023
If you are in an area where it exists, and have the time, getting to know your local scene might be of use. I haven't done that here in Australia, but was on the scene in the UK. Enough to meet new people, and get to know reputations. Loads of opportunities to play at clubs and parties. And to meet new people, safely. Of course you have to make up your own mind about them. I certainly played with people who others said 'ooh no, avoid, abusive', when what they really meant was a foot stomp that the dom in question didn't give them what they fantasised about. It cuts both ways. There are mysoginists aplenty masquerading as dominant/top. But there are neurotic needy insecure women masquerading as submissive/bottom. But the scene is a great way to get a one off experience, safely.