Screenshots publishing

SirsBabyDoll​(sub female){Pizza+☕} • Feb 14, 2023

There is a HUGE difference between writing about how you want to be approached and your perspective about the mindset of the "insta-Doms", and taking a screenshot of the exact wording used by someone and posting it on THIS site.

THIS site does not condone the practice. It doesn't matter if it's legal or what other sites do. Let other sites police themselves.

HERE, it's not allowed, period.

TopekaDom​(dom male) • Feb 14, 2023

The problem is people will write shit to someone because they know they can get away with it and the worst thing will happen is a wrist slap.

I never got this idea that once you hit send, that message becomes the personal private property of the messenger. Why is it not the property of the recipient? Why can't they do with it as they see fit?

If you don't want stuff published, don't send it.

Let me repeat that:

IF YOU DON'T WANT STUFF PUBLISHED, DON'T SEND IT

MissBonnie​(dom female){oz} • Feb 15, 2023

Not saying this to get in argument (and actually not aiming at you) because I do understand what your saying. I agree THINK before you send, if you couldn't say it in PUBLIC should you really say those things to a ..maybe..almost...stranger that you've had no conversation with previously. I also think it sucks they get away with it. I use a lot of sites and rampart everywhere. I won't even get into dick pics!

But in the same vein, a line in the preverbal netiquette sand needs to be drawn (for site users and website owners) its no longer the wild west of the nineties online. The sad thing is, it needed to be done and rules needed to be created where you can't do as you please. Now some BDSM sites are banning attached images due to fear of legal recourse (some countries it illegal to send nudes without consent) but that's a whole other issue

I'm digressing ....For EG: Your image is attached to your post, fine to re publish? Your dressed, decent looking, you liked the image or you wouldn't share it. It seems harmless? Right?
But is it free to use as the another person sees fit. ? Is it ok to put a narrative with it, maybe taken out of context of your own words?
Isn't that really the same thing, words and images are identifying. Where do we draw that line? (again this isn't aimed at the OP or the quoted TopekaDom. I'm generalizing here)
You didn't give permission for it to be used. I've had my images taken and used along with my words on other sites. Some even made money off them. It sucks and can be damaging when you have no control over it.
Art works? posts? Blogs of thoughts and feelings? stories? music? etc, etc are they free to repost? Copyright in any form, left or right, free, cc share, bene or other wise comes with not only netiquette RULES but also LEGAL rules (as do your own words in private) Granted some sites do allow this<republishing of others words>(the cage does not so the point here is mute) other sites NOTHING YOU POST IS YOUR OWN as you sign a disclaimer on entry and then every time you enter, you are doing so digitally saying you agree to the rules of entry. It's why I always tell newbies READ WHAT YOU SIGN even on BDSM websites or you might have no recourse.

Sorry for the mini rant LOL

missusK​(sub female) • Feb 16, 2023

A twitter account has done this and received mixed results. She posts all sorts of things, but mostly confessions and bad tweets and has been reported more times than she can count. Mostly for bullying. While I understand that you want to create a black list, and I have quite a few I could add, and a part of me thinks it is a good idea, it is unethical to share another's account info. PERIOD.
If it is all anonymous, I think it could work but you have to be sure to not give out personal info.

HOWEVER:::
If you were to create an educational forum, where these messages are used to show what not to do, or what red flags to watch our for, signs of abuse, etc., then it could be beneficial.

But to simply call out douchebags. I wouldn't waste your time. There will always be more.

reticent​(sub female) • Feb 17, 2023

Funny I am dealing with this issue on a similar site. The difference being that I screen shotted and posted public comments on a photograph in my album. I blacked out his username but not photos, as far as I'm concerned those comments were made publicly, and there was 0 information that he had not made readily available and public, there was actually less information than he had advertised on my profile, so I was ADDING protections to him and his misogyny. The site also decided to ban my blog post for 'hate' despite the fact that the only direct hate was posted by him in a public forum with his very public profile. These sites are out to protect their target/paid membership base - which is men. We don't rate when it comes to speaking up for ourselves or trying to protect other women/spread the word about predators in our midst.

Solace​(dom male) • Feb 17, 2023

reticent I sincerely apologize for any mistreatment you've suffered. I also don't condone further actions or the verbal abuse many girls have suffered here. However, just as you have kindly pointed out the sin of misogyny, I too will take the time to warn you your post is rather misandrist in nature.

Yes, websites like these do need to make a profit. Yes the majority of the paid subscribers are men. However the nature of online dating sites and the cage as well are financially predatory to men. While ladies here enjoy (or do not ) the benefit of men paying for the existence of this website it is not an honor to pay for a service that someone else gets freely and have those same individuals generically complain about you. Men must have premium memberships to give or receive attention on these sites, its a very easy test to verify for yourself. Women do not have this requirement. You and any other lady are certainly welcome to pay for these dubious protections and privileges at any time. As an experienced person, I'll helpfully enlighten you that its a very low cost to be paid only every month for several years on any platform you wish to speak on. A man tax if you will which certainly does not discriminate against women, you are welcome to it and I invite you to be a part of it.

TranquilStorm • Feb 17, 2023

Your point gives some solace. However for me it boils down to two different things and while there is always some overlap and grey-zones, in this case i feel we can separate the two.

One is the motivation to be on (kink, dating, pokemon) sites. With men being more easily attracted to these sites there is an abvious supply/demand imbalance. Not gonna go into details, but this has all sorts of consequences for a community and deserves its own discussion.

As for the screenshot publishing, what you think is anonymous might actually be pretty revealing to others (e.g. just check those geo location wizzards). And i can think of several scenarios tops of my head how to frame someone a creep. So better to nip this ugly can of worms in the bud.

If not criminally relevant, just move on (or block or report)? Btw, that also goes for outraged guys akin to "oh woe me, how can she ignore my totally sincere message or change her mind". Happens.

Slavehandler​(dom male) • Feb 17, 2023

It depends entirely on country though. If someone post something private even without the information the person can just prove it is their personal message willingly and therefore get you in trouble willingly. And the laws are different from country to country too. So, I would generally not bother doing it unless it provides some value.

For example, it could be educational to share the general story/text and suggest how the person should approach her rather than just shaming using original screenshot. At the very least someone will learn or get some value out of it.

reticent​(sub female) • Feb 17, 2023

Maybe if these sites weren't so full of mansplaining 'doms' some women would pay for the extra features/being able to message anybody we want. Paying a monthly subscription for a vaguely meaningful connection with somebody in another country once every 9 months, and to be harassed and talked down to 1,000 times in between? No thank you.

reticent​(sub female) • Feb 17, 2023

Also why are you on here crying about a 'man tax' on a website you don't subscribe to?